Because IP law is a thing of interest to nerds, and they believe that it's stuff that matters. But maybe not to you, sooooo, quick, let's bicker on the Internets now because your preferences aren't the same as everyone elses. Your whiney post has been somewhat legitimized by my humorous comment; you're welcome, no charge, it appears you could use a little bit of a sense of humor, and I have a little extra to share with the less fortunate. ^_^

Because it comes in PINTS!

What could possibly go wrong?

Click the pictures link, it's worth your time.

Wannabes. The religious hipster cool kids have been getting their media via STONE TABLET for several millenniums now.

Can I patent patenting patents? Then all you suckers gotta pay!

Thank you, China, for the excessively entertaining action!

Sudden outbreaks of common sense?? If this is forbearance to 2012, BRING ON THE FUTURE!

The best way to beat Priests in Mana Drain, obviously. No mana, no spellcasting. No Psychic Scream spamming, and certainly no healing!

I think you've confused "peak" with "optimal."

Peak = best possible output

Optimal = most satisfactory

You can tune an engine to run within optimal specs. But if you run it at peak nonstop...

Metrics. Excellent, I hate when bosses use the Imperial system.

All jokes aside: If you care about your job in this economic climate, I suggest you do what your 2 other teammates are doing - picking through the stats that make YOU look the best. The company isn't going to look out for you. IT is an expense to be cut, remember. Boosts the temporary bottom line, promotes "growth" in this fiscal quarter, gets the investors going so the CEO can shuffle another fold into his golden parachute. If non-important metrics are selected that sacrifice your job, it's a brief victory lap straight into the unemployment line.

We can't answer your question, though. In the end, I recommend you watch a clip from "Office Space" - wherein the Bobs interview the employees:

Bob: "So tell me, what is it, exactly, that you do here?"

If you can't answer that question, you probably should be job hunting already. Or should have kept a copy of the job posting from when you applied.

And it makes our women AWESOME.