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It's funny.  Laugh.

OSI vs Taco Bell 94

This one isn't worded for the easily offended, but I laughed my (strong word) off. Kent Dahlgren sent us a bit from his page that rips the OSI network model apart, and proceeds to compare the 7 level OSI network model to a Taco Bell 7 Layer Burrito. It's funny- laugh. I did.
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OSI vs Taco Bell

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  • by chkdsk ( 145 )
    That's one of the original ideas that I thought up for [] with Scott and Leonard. "Great minds think alike"? (or somesuch...) Cool. (^:
  • Hey, don't forget Simula 67, the first language with the class concept. It was developed in Norway by Dahl and Nygaard.
  • C.A.R. Hoare

    I'm surprised no one's commented on this yet. That's a great name if parents want to torture their kid (especially a daughter). Sure seems fun idea to be in that family.

  • Hmm. So taking pot shots at other parts of the globe is amusing... I'll have to remember that.

    The European contingent in the comments section here on slashdot seems to have no trouble remembering it with regards to people in the States.


    "One World, One Web, One Program" - Microsoft Promotional Ad

  • ml

    This time from a 'net visionary'...

    Heh heh.
  • L. Torvalds developed an OS called Linux which is based on Unix while a graduate student in Finland.

    And where exactly do you think UNIX was developed? Couldn't be the US, could it?
  • I'd call that a strike *against* Europeans, not for. All that C++ does is mess up a perfectly good language (which, incidentally, was created by americans :P)
  • I know both C and C++, although I'll admit I've used C a lot more than C++, so perhaps I'm biased. I can see the usefulness of classes and data-hiding with large multi-programmer projects, where you want the AI team to be able to program without having to know anything about the graphics programming, and vice-versa, but for a one-programmer project (such as most of the stuff I do), having classes and data-hiding is pretty much useless. Plus "pass by reference" in C++ is just a crutch for people who don't know how to use pointers. I could name other things, such as how damn slow multiple inheritence and polymorphism makes your program. Also, the string class really encourages inefficient programming. In C, if you wanted to keep changing the length of a string (char array), you knew you were doing so. In C++, it does it for you, so you could be constantly allocating and deallocating char arrays without being as aware of it. Basically, C++ makes it easier to write inefficient code, and to write said code faster.

    Anyway, my point is that I can see a limited use for it, but for most programs, it introduces unneeded complexity, as well as providing various crutches that keep programmers from having to write efficient programs.
  • Posted by tdibble:

    The tortilla is layer 0, which in OSI is the floor upon which the physical network stands.
  • Maybe you can read something into his "joke" resume; or maybe _you_ are "retarded" as you put it. In other words I am saying you might be wrong.

    Are you kidding? What in the following excerpt could possibly be written in any serious fashion by someone intelligent enough to properly format html (not a great feat, but certianly a benchmark) and obviously computer literate:


    I am very handy with a hammer, but I think my calling is in sales or customer relations. I'm a people person. I spent a week with my step dad in Arizona and he taught me how to weld. I've become very interested lately in pyrotechnics. Maybe a job starting fires would be cool. Hey, I'm flexible. I just need a goddammed job. If I don't get a job soon, I'll be forced to take up that offer that recruiter from the ARMY gave me.

  • "Get a grip. IT'S A FREAKING JOKE!!!"

    Hmm. So taking pot shots at other parts of the globe is amusing... I'll have to remember that.

    FYI. There are probably more Pascal developers than Linux developers full stop... Borland Delphi for one has over 1 million developers...and unlike VB and C++ it doesn't suck.
  • He was obviously using invective and hyperbole to create an effect: this is not uncommon in writing. Satire and irony can also be used. Sure, some of the comments were gross and unfair, but that's the point of the style - his resume seems to follow along with this attempt at cynical toughness.

    "No wonder we booger eating Yanks think the Europeans are sissies."

    Pokes fun at Americans as well. Oh, well, just my $0.02.
  • No, man, it has other meanings.

    In fact, he mentions the meaning he's using... "sissy". If I say people are gay, that can also mean they're joyful. If I say people are "faggy", that can also mean they're sissies. Learn to properly interpret connotations.

    Mark Twain called black people niggers because that's what everyone called them. It was common speak for "negroid", which was the politically correct term then. Because people today can't interpret what he was saying then, Huckleberry Finn is sometimes banned. Because you can't interpret what this author is saying now, you're upset and calling him names.

    Try to understand what people mean before you slander them.
  • Well, OSI as a protocol definition is dead, and has been for a while. As a model for networking layers, I think it does a good job of separating functionality into distinct sections. TCP/IP actually fits into the OSI model. IP is at the network layer, and TCP/UDP are at the transport layer.

    --Phil (I first learned the OSI model from W. Richard Stevens' UNIX Network Programming. I thik he know's what he's doing.)
  • Interestingly enough, the guy bashes Europeans as unable to come up with a decent computer (um, CERN, Linux, hello?) and his domain is

  • My guess is that the napkin serves as a garbage collector, cleaning up after the network stack's memory allocations.
  • Don't go confusing Turing Machines with the Turing Test.
    One is a conceptual machine involving a tape moving back and forth... The Turing Machine has been proven to be equivalent to a Von Neumann Machine, which is the model that *all* modern computers follow. (hey, why has nobody mentioned Von Neumann yet?) The simplicity of the Turing Machine means it can be used to prove deep things about computability and so forth. You can get Turing Machine emulators if you want to play about with one... apparently the estate of Alan Turing isn't suing anyone over it ;)
    The Turing Test is an attempt at an answer to the question "How would be know if we'd managed to develop machine intelligence?".
    Two different things.
    As to the idiot who said "Turing was a faggot who killed himself"...
    Well, Turing was gay, and he killed himself as
    a result of the intolerance of society at the time (so their fault, not his)
    and the pressure of his work at Bletchley Park, you know, winning World War II....
  • There's no confusion. You're just wrong.

    BTW the Turing Test was a nice idea, but clearly
    flawed, since many machines have passed the test
    which quite clearly do not display *any form* of
  • Find out about Turing Machines
    here []
    Find out about the Turing Test
    here []

    They may not be the best resources on the matter,
    but they seem to be OK, and will link to other places...

    As you will see, the Turing Test and the Turing Machine are only related by the fact that the same clever geezer thought them up, and they have something to do with computing.
  • The sad thing is that this is true.. jeeze i didn't realize how close a burrito is to this model....

    that's why I add jolepenios!
  • First comment, it seems!

    Anyway, this was a very refreshing article. I actually worked on the OSI/Communications System for MVS and VM/CMS during a brief (6 endless months) stint at IBM. I had to deal with FTAM, ASN-1, and loads of other useless garbage.

    Had I had the Taco Bell Reference Model back then, I might have lasted 7 months working for IBM.

  • Good point. I guess I got carried away. In any case, I can re-type some of the gory details for establishing and monitoring an FTAM session.

    I also have a (never completed) ASN-1 parser. It's interesting seeing that SGML/XML do the same thing, without all the blabber.


  • Damn, where's this guy live? $.99 for a seven layer burrito? They're a buck thirty nine around here...

    Hmph... no cable modems, no DSL, expensive taco bell... why do I live here?
  • It was named after some Greek goddess or other. And while Europa was not named after Europe, I guess they could both have been named after the same mythical figure.


  • You need to be a bit more niggardly with your posts. This is Slashdot, not English class ;-)

    Ever thought that the guy didn't care about offending people. I mean, I thought he went out of his way to offend quite a number of people, including Americans, Hispanics (who, after all, had nothing to do with burritos as we gringos know them), Europeans....etc, etc. Alot of people use the terms "gay" and "queer" not even in the context of homosexuality or questioning of one's manhood. When I was growing up (which wasn't that long ago), I used "queer" to mean something odd or strange, and I'm only 20 so there were plenty of people who used "queer" to mean homosexual.

    I'm not saying that some people shouldn't be offended by what he said, but sometimes you need to put things in context. The post was a rambling outrage, on par with Dennis Leary's tyrades, and I thought it was rather humorous. At no point did I think he was making fun of homosexuals; and for anyone that did, I'm sorry for them. Sometimes things are put the wrong way and sometimes they are taken the wrong way; and they aren't always meant to offend (remember the Seinfeld office incident). I think alot of times, people are on the lookout to be outraged, and so they find ways not to disappoint themselves. Over-sensitive political correctness is a bane on society.
    Aaron Gaudio
    "The fool finds ignorance all around him.
  • On the larger level, I would suppose this was not meant to offend anyone in particular, just an author adopting a dubious choice of voice. On the other hand, if it had been done well, it might have been funny.

    I wasn't happy about the fags remark on two levels. First, it's offensive. However words are just words, and I can let it slide in most cases. Second, though, is that it wasn't funny. It was beyond cliched, it just made no sense. What do "fags" dress like? Try watching a gay pride parade. You will see every fashion in creation, from conservative blue suits to polo shirts to t-shirt and jeans, to lovely chiffon floor length gowns.

    What do "fags" dress like? They dress like you.

    Moving on, TCP/IP doesn't replace the OSI model, it fits in it. I wonder if Kent understands the model. Here's an explanation of the model as it works around the dinner table.

    1. Physical. Humans or other creatures, with physical bodies. "Have a seat"
    2. Data Link. He have Aural/Oral information (talking) and physical information (food). Physical information is moved with attendee intervention, and Aural/Oral, by talking and listening. We will use Collision Detection to decide who gets to communicate. "Sorry, You go first." "No, you go, you have the jam."
    3. Network. How do you get a packet from any thing in the network to anything else. "George, would you pass this jam to Lynn?"
    4. Transport. Error handling and sequencing. "George, you will need to hold the jam upright, the lid is off. Would you then pass this spoon, so Lynn can get the jam out? Here's the lid, hold on to that until Lynn is done spooning out the jam."
    5. Session Layer. Politeness. The end of session marker could be "Thanks, George."
    6. Presentation. "Lynn, the jam is in a jar." or "Lynn, the jam is in a bowl." or "Lynn, the jam is in a squeeze bottle."
    7. Application. "Lynn, if you want Jam, you'll need to ask for it by saying 'Could I have Jam please' or if a specific person has it, 'Hacksaw, could you pass the jam toward me?'." Also, "Tonight we have jam, bread, rolls, salad, stir fried vegetables, and an apple torte for desert."
    This could be considered a pathalogical example. On the other hand, TCP/IP as a model isn't refined enough to suggest things like IP-IP tunneling. It also doesn't break out the major areas that could be tweaked to make a set of applications even more efficient. Admittedly, you can get all these things done in TCP/IP. The OSI model is most useful for organizations that are trying to optimize their production model where it deals ith network communication.
  • * The Turing machine was developed by Alan Turing in England. */

    And how many of of THOSE have you seen running???

    None. A turing machine is a theoretical computing model that can be used to determine whether a computer can solve a problem. Basically if it can't be done on a Turing machine no computer can do it. Currently, no one has come up with a better model. By better model, I mean one that can solve more problems than a turing machine. Quantum computing may become the new model, but currently I don't think anyone has shown that it can solve previously uncomputable problems.

  • ... Could be expanded out to fit this model, easy. It's scary how well this describes TacoBell food, but for the veggie in the office, it's pretty much the Standard...
  • And the US has given us: DOS, Windows, MacOS, etc
  • Europe has descended into the most incredible immorality and filthiness. But don't feel bad about it, we're quickly coming up to speed.
  • Or maybe my connection just sucks.
  • Oh, and let's not forget: Alan Turing, one of the best and most influential theoriticians in computing the world has ever seen, was a `fag.'


  • ha! you all forgot the early arabs for arithmetic..and the greeks...
    and the monkeys that came down out of the trees..
    and the alleged comet that wiped out the aforementioned dinosaurs(or act of god or aliens, whatever works for you)
  • You know, TCP/IP fits the OSI model fairly well.

    Gee, and let's note that Charles Babbage came from Europe. CERN is in Europe. Turing was from Europe. Some guy named Linus Torvalds is from Europe.

    And one more's not really correct to say that the US military funded the Internet. Although DARPA provided initial funding for the Internet, it was by no means a military project. All this business about a nuclear war-survivable network is false. The Internet came about so that DARPA didn't have to give computers to every university that wanted was designed to save money, that's all.

    Anyway, rant mode off, yes, the page is funny. Yes, comparisons can be made to anything that has seven layers, probably including Dagwood's sandwich. But the ravings that precede it aren't exactly correct.

  • by Jose ( 15075 )
    anyone else find it ironic that he is making fun of Europeans, and his web site is
    just a thought...
  • Sorry, I hit the Submit button when I meant to hit Preview, and look where it got me...

    Your argument denies some essential and self-evident facts about language. (Okay...for the sake of disclosure, my training is in linguistics, but I'm not claiming to be an authority on language.)

    Let's look for a moment at your first assertion, i.e. that referring to somebody as gay may mean that they're joyful. However, the meanings of words change. And gay, when referring to a person, has not had the meaning "joyful" in at least two decades. When you use it that way, you are very apt to be misunderstood.

    This is not "merely semantics". (As a linguist, I hate that phrase, because semantics isn't merely anything--it's probably the most complicated and inscrutable part of language.) If you were to say you "compiled several versions of the Linux kernel today", anyone who thought that you put them all in a document with annotations and indexing would obviously be out of his or her freakin' mind.

    Pulling out the dictionary and noting that the first definition of the verb compile is "to compose into a volume" doesn't change the fact that, when dealing with programs, the verb "compile" always refers to a secondary meaning, "to run (as a program) through a compiler."

    Similarly, just because the first definition of gay given in the dictionary is "merrily excited" doesn't mean that you can refer to a person as gay in this day and age and not have your interlocutor assume you mean he is homosexual.

    This is controversial, however. There are many language purists out there who seek to preserve older meanings of older words. There's no need here and now to get into that intractable, and ridiculous, argument. I would merely point out that Slashdot is filled with words that no one would even think of reading with their "standard" meanings, e.g. broadcast, program, flame, cookie, page, site, develop, crash. Anyone who criticized the deviation from "standard usage" of one of these words in a Slashdot post would be flamed to hell, and rightly so.

    Your second assertion, however, is ridiculous. If you mean sissy, then say sissy. To use a term which is hurtful to a group of people--knowing that it is hurtful to that group of people, when there are other perfectly good words for describing exactly the same concept--is either irrational or sadistic.

    In case you're not aware of the origins of the word fag, let me enlighten you, as it may be illuminating as to why this word is unacceptable for conversational use. That it is derived from the word "faggot" is undisputed; this word first appeared in print no later than 1914 to refer to a male homosexual.

    The entymology becomes hazier beyond this point. However, it is widely believed to be a coinage from the word faggot (ME fagotfaggots is the term for the bundles of kindling used in the burning of heretics. One group of heretics that were burned were male homosexuals.

    You can see why the term is so objectionable. To use it to refer to a person (whether a homosexual person or to a, as you say, "sissy") insinuates to many that you believe that the person should be penalized for their behavior by being burned alive.

    Though I'm well aware that geeks are by and large very "anti-politically correct", they also by and large have a strong libertarian streak. I would be very suprised if even a sizable minority of the readers of Slashdot have personally homophobic opinions. But referring to a document that uses such a damaging word in its very first sentence in an off-the-wall manner as "damn funny" is very hurtful to the many of us who identify as lesbian or gay.

  • Hey, us Euros might be able to create the perfect networking standard, but at least we don't write crap like "Therefore, beans build upon the foundation that beans have built, and rightfully deserve to always be the second ingredient.".

    Um yeah. Second after beans.

    And for the humourically impaired, this is meant in the same vein as the article, i.e. don't blow a gasket reading it, it's not serious!

    Anyway Del Taco is better, Fat Tacos = yum!

    Mr Onions. No relation.
  • The article isn't even funny. If it were humorous, it would draw insightful comparisons between the OSI model and the Taco Bell product. Instead, it just describes both. Oh, that took brain work! NOT!

    The opening, however, is absolutely not funny. It says "If you aren't sterotypical macho male, you aren't worthy of respect." A lot of your most famous computer scientists are gay or bisexual... so learn your history and get some respect.


  • Aw jeez, lighten up. I'm not a bigot, and I'm not going to defend myself by showing you pictures of my token gay friends. Screw off, sissy, or I'll pick you up by your underwear. Hahahahaahahahahaha Have you seen this [] page yet? Its a cool one.
  • As the other responded stated the term "fag" is here used to mean sissy. The substance of this being used as an insult is as follows: A) Homosexuals are sissies B) You are a homosexual C) You are a sissy. Obiviously you can see how this would piss off and offend homosexuals who hear it used this way. Furthermore, this myth that gay men are weak sissies is complete bull. Some of my best friends who are gay have had to hold their own in many a bar fight and have walked away unscathed. Think twice before you though around the word "fag".
  • Hmmm i would hope that this C code is something that you worked on in your spare time outside of IBM, considering if it isn't, you're committing a very serious crime :)

    I don't think IBM would really appreciate anyone just offering up any source code someone has written while under their big blue arm...I should know, I'm working there right now...and I each his own.
  • heh, well, without c++ you'd still be working with languages like oh....cobol, pascal, etc.

    And without it you wouldn't have your lovely little ol sockets that you use more times out of a day than you probably use the toilet :)

    just my 2 measley cents :)
  • Well, if you're going to include that i'm going to throw in the Babylonians and the Summerians for whatever the hell they used again...been so long I don't even remember :)

    I know one of them just used lines.......

    BAH oh well

System restarting, wait...