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I Believe You Have My Stapler 583

yack0 writes "After three years of demand and countless calls, emails and letters, you can finally buy a Red Swingline Stapler. Hooray! As noted in this wall street journal article and confirmed by this page at the Swingline Stapler web site you can now pick up a Red Swingline stapler for merely twice the price of a plain black stapler. However, a colleague of mine says that the online order form is reading around $16 for his right now. Now all the cubicle dwelling prairie dogs can get one step closer to burning down the building." The red stapler has become some sort of cult icon at this point.
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I Believe You Have My Stapler

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  • by RTFA Man ( 578488 ) on Wednesday July 10, 2002 @11:36PM (#3862144) Homepage
    What the fuck is this?? A goddamn story about a red fucking stapler?

    Gene Kan is dead. Got it? Dead. From a probable self-inflicted, but we're not sure, but we'll probably call it that, even though his employer says otherwise, and his family for some odd fucking reason doesn't want any details released, gunshot wound. A guy who has just about everything a young cali bro could want, a fancy car collection, respect from his peers, a PAYING job (sorry slashdork crew), you name it. Dead.

    Oh, but the red stapler story is boss.

  • Re:Whoop-dee-shit. (Score:3, Insightful)

    by Arctech ( 538041 ) on Wednesday July 10, 2002 @11:47PM (#3862199) Journal
    You were looking for actual news?
    Man, has someone ever lost his way...
  • Re:Cultural Icon (Score:2, Insightful)

    by GriffX ( 130554 ) on Wednesday July 10, 2002 @11:54PM (#3862244) Homepage
    The performances, particularly Ron Livingstone (hugely underrated actor)...

    No kidding. He was fantastic in "Band of Brothers" [] [IMDB link] as Cpt. Lew Nixon. For anyone who may have seen the show, he was the hard-drinking pal of Major Winters, the noble and heroic leader of the company.

    It was a great mini-series - hell, it was a great film - and Livingston was equally great in a second-banana role. He could easily have played it as the 'drunk heroe's buddy', but instead filled the role with humanity. He made a character who had comparatively little screen-time seem like a real person. I hope the real Lewis Nixon is toasting him with a tumbler of Vat 69, wherever he is.
  • by Art Tatum ( 6890 ) on Thursday July 11, 2002 @01:11AM (#3862544)
    Interesting is also a relative term. That's why you can turn off categories and editors. I suggest you go turn off the humor category right now and never have to see these stories anymore. Or you might want to go somewhere more serious []. Or not. But it's of little use complaining here.
  • by ipfwadm ( 12995 ) on Thursday July 11, 2002 @01:21AM (#3862566) Homepage
    Gene Kan is dead. Got it? Dead.

    And up until 5 minutes ago, I had never heard of this guy. Why not? Because from reading the Wired news article, all he did was work on Gnutella. Gnutella. Who cares. After reading your post I thought maybe this guy had invented the Internet. People die all the time. And according to the article, "Kan's suicide was not completely unexpected, according to some of his friends. They had hoped Kan was winning his hard-fought battle against depression exacerbated by personal problems." I battled depression too and I'm a programmer, should /. run an article on me now? I would be willing to bet that far more /. readers have seen Office Space and are interested in a red stapler than know who this guy was. Oh, and did I mention, he died on June 29. It is now July 11. The story has been on Wired for almost 2 days now. Isn't it a little late for you to go into this rant? And as other posters mentioned, just because he had fancy cars and respect and money doesn't mean he was happy.
  • Re:Cultural Icon (Score:5, Insightful)

    by gsfprez ( 27403 ) on Thursday July 11, 2002 @01:24AM (#3862576)
    > individuality and color can't help but improve
    > the condiditon of those who must exist in that
    > environment from day to day.


    how could this get a Score of 4? When Apple did this - they got beaten about the head and neck on slashdot.

    this place makes no sense sometimes.
  • by australopithecus ( 215774 ) on Thursday July 11, 2002 @02:01AM (#3862694)
    word....what im noticing here in Hong Kong is that any sort of questioning of your boss is viewed as sacrilege. i can understand how this practice came abuot, but il be damned if ill keep my mouth shut if my boss does something retarded.
  • by Cryptnotic ( 154382 ) on Thursday July 11, 2002 @04:34AM (#3863039)
    Dependence on individual brilliance is not necessarily a bad thing.

    When that one individual gets hit by a car and the entire company is fucked, that's a bad thing. Or when the brilliant genius gets headhunted and goes to a company that will pay him 3 times as much and give him a team of people to do all the boring stuff... of course, no one else understands the guy's system.

    Real companies try not to operate that way. They force their geniuses to document their work so if all else fails, they can hire a lesser genius to take the place of the genius who leaves. Even if you're the genius who started the company, it's better if you document things so that you can retire young.

  • by mithras the prophet ( 579978 ) on Thursday July 11, 2002 @08:46AM (#3863561) Homepage Journal

    It means something is funny and you laugh at it. You'll see it commonly on Internet forums, and occasionally in real life conversation...

    (methinks this one didn't see the movie?)
  • by The_Shadows ( 255371 ) <thelureofshadows@hotmai l . com> on Thursday July 11, 2002 @09:10AM (#3863668) Homepage
    No offense man, but grow some cajones. If they fire you, they fire you. You obviously don't care for this job too much.
  • Re:DOD version... (Score:1, Insightful)

    by Anonymous Coward on Thursday July 11, 2002 @09:59AM (#3863900)
    Do you think that if sparrows showed up on radar the operator would be able to see anything? Even small aircraft have tiny primary returns. Something with the radar crossection of a bird is for all intents and purposes invisible.
  • by MagnaMark ( 468484 ) on Thursday July 11, 2002 @10:55AM (#3864247)

    That's pretty funny. It's also pretty funny that most of us paying homage to Office Space are doing so from a cubicle somewhere in corporate IT land.

    It reminds me of a theory put forward by Tom Tomorrow [] about Dilbert.

    In this [] op-ed piece, he suggests "that fellow cartoonist Scott Adams might actually be "providing a valuable service for all those idiotic bosses" he parodies in his syndicated strip, Dilbert -- "by giving their employees a safety valve that's just edgy enough to ring true, without inspiring anyone to actually question the fundamental assumptions of corporate America."

    It's a compelling idea that could apply to Office Space just as well.

  • by LatJoor ( 464031 ) <> on Thursday July 11, 2002 @11:03AM (#3864300) Homepage
    Hey, I'm glad he made that comment so we could get that second, much better story out of you. That brightened my day.

Thus spake the master programmer: "Time for you to leave." -- Geoffrey James, "The Tao of Programming"