Abm0raz's Journal: for Em

Today has been the worst day of the year and it's not even 9:30 yet. I have a tendancy to show up late for work everyday by 5-15 minutes. This is ok cause I only take a 30 min lunch and usually am the last to leave as well. Well, I went to bed early last night and woke up early. Took my time getting ready (rather than my normal rush like hell). Got out to my car with 20 minutes till 8 (takes me 10 min to get to work) and there was a 1/4" frost build-up on all the windows. I got my new scraper out (a nice one, $30 for a solid metal with grips, big snow brush on one side and nice big plastic ice scraper on the other. The old one broke in the last freezing rain storm). Scraped off the driver's window, walked around back, slipped on the ice and did a full split. Tore my slacks and boxers from front to back. Lemme tell you, nothing wakes you up like your nuts hitting ice first thing in the morning. During the fall, my scraper hit the ground bearing most of my weight. The actual scraper part shattered and the metal handle bent. I got up, tucked me jubblees in as best I could and started the car up. Set all the defrosters on high and went back inside to change clothes. Went to the closet and realized I had no other clean slacks. Found a pair of worn ones, Fabreezed them and ironed the wrinkles. Called into work to let them know I'd be a few minutes late, but there was no answer. Got back to the car and the defroster hadn't even made a dent. My Cell phone goes off. It's a secretery for another department saying that there was an emergency and they needed me ASAP. I told her I was already in my car, but it'd be 15-20 minutes yet. Once I got the little "half moon" spots defrosted, I drove in hunched over looking through those. Got caught at every light on the way, sometimes it took 2 lights for me to make it through the intersection (damn left turns and timid drivers). The way the day is going, I know I'm gonna get pulled over ont he way home cause my emissions sticker is out of date. Why the hell should I have to pay $75 just for them to put a sticker on my car that says "no emissions testing needed" because my car is that old?

I hate life.

-Ab

this here is the truth:

[Em Emalb]

Lemme tell you, nothing wakes you up like your nuts hitting ice first thing in the morning.

Speak it brother, speak it.

Sounds like you've had a fun morning so far. Hope it gets better.

Made me laugh though, thanks.

Schadenfreude

[Ethelred Unraed]

Made me laugh though, thanks.

And you have now understood the meaning of the German word Schadenfreude. Well, not exactly...if you were secretly happy all this happened to Ab, then...

Something about the fact that the Germans have a word for this bothers me.

Cheers,

Ethelred

Re:Schadenfreude

[SolemnDragon]

just don't try stapling your boxers the way i had to for my suit trousers... Let me tell ya, that was a treat. Is it contagious or something?

just be glad that you didn't 'rip' anything else.

so

Re:Schadenfreude

[Abm0raz]

Being a hockey player helped in the fact that I CAN do a split, it just doesn't feel good. That and my dress shoes don't work remotely as well on ice as skates do, especially parking lot ice. I'm sure I'll be sore tomorrow morning.

-Ab