spun's Journal: A black fly in your Chardonnay

So Merrel was over tonight. I don't think he would mind me using his real name, and it is less awkward than the whole "Mr. M." convention. He's not skittish and weird like Mr. Y. He and I hit it off great. In fact, that's the problem.

Jenny is jealous of our intellectual connection. There's more to it than just that, of course. She lived as a fag-hag in San Francisco for so long, and has had so many guys stolen from her by other guys, that she's a little wary when two guys she likes connect.

We were just geeking out, and I have been hit on by enough guys to know the difference, but she felt threatened. Part of it is the fact that, intelligent as she is, her main thrust of intelligence lies in areas different from those traditionally respected as such. You know. Liberal Arts. There, I said it. Get a liberal arts type in a group with science types and they are all like, "No really, my knowledge has relevance!" I tried to mollify the situation, but he's one of those guys who has obviously been hurt by women almost one too many times. So he's nervous because she is acting a little weird.

I say "almost" because if a guy has been hurt too many times by women, it really can turn him "gay." Some guys are born wanting cock. Some guys are thrust into it. Everyone is a little bi, I think, and just like in prison, if you can't get what you need from a preferred source for whatever reason, you'll get it from the next best place.

He's not gay at all. He likes the same things about Jenny that I like. She's got curves like a woman, not like a prepubescent boy. So he listens to Abba and likes musicals, he can't be the only straight guy to do so.

I have real reason to try to make all this work. I like Merrel. I don't know that many geeks who have a surfeit of other geeks in their lives and that kind of intellectual connection is as fun as sex. So I don't want to make my wife jealous of me and the 6'7", hung like a horse guy she's fucking. That's more ironic than a black fly in your chardonnay.

Gota Say

[Jeremiah Cornelius]

For all of the advantages you tout in the polyamory life, it does seem like you've unnecessarily complicated things.

Re:

[spun]

I like complication. I've been putting myself into emotionally challenging situations for as long as I can remember. But this isn't primarily about me. Jenny never dated anyone before me. She had one night stands with guys who wouldn't talk to her the next day, when she got desperate enough, but mostly she just felt like she was meant to be some kind of sexless android. This is really helping her self esteem and letting her have the kinds of dating experiences that most of us have had at least some of. Plus

Re:

[iminplaya]

I like complication. I've been putting myself into emotionally challenging situations for as long as I can remember.

It certainly gives plenty of material: Some guys are thrust into it. ?

..if you cant be with the one you love
Love the one your with

Re:

[spun]

That was one of my better one liners, wasn't it?

That's a lie!

[An Onerous Coward]

So he listens to Abba and likes musicals, he can't be the only straight guy to do so.

Can too! Can too!