shankar2k's Journal: The Wedding of Vasanthganesh and Preetha

Cheese. Sappy Sentiment. That's what has been missing from my peoples' weddings. I'm amazed that I experienced this is in the most "arranged" of arranged marriages.

My cousin Vas is 32, and there were many in my family who believed that he would never get married. But over a year ago, some relatives found a girl through the grapevine that they believe Vas would be interested in, and so they started communicating over the internet, and bing-bang-BOOM! They were engaged. The full details of their courtship are quite charming from what I hear.

I've long held the opinion that my people's weddings are not at all designed for enjoyment. Essentially it is just an opportunity for relatives to come and make a mental checklist of all the various rituals (called "krama"), and then complain if some krama was not followed. Even the reception is sedate. The bride and groom sit on a throne on stage while different families come up for photographs and to give gifts. There is music loud enough so no one can talk, but no one dances. So the guest sit, get their picture take with the couple, eat, and leave. Sesha knew this, and so wisely chose not to have a reception for his wedding.

Vasanth's mother, my Nirmala-auntie decided that she didn't like this status quo either, so there were many changes. The Chatra, where the wedding and reception were held, was an air-conditioned hall. That made the wedding much more palatable for us foreigners. The rituals were essentially the same as for Sesha's wedding. I wore a golden-brown kurta that my mother gave me for my birthday.

They held a reception, but unlike any "namakulu" one I've seen. There was the photo-session on the throne, and the food, but there was also a magician performing tricks, and afterwards a DJ and dancing. Of late, I've grown fond of dancing, so even though I was sober, I pranced around and shook my booty. Many of my relatives, even the stodgy ones, got on the dance floor and jumped around. At the end of the night, the DJ played this sappy 80's ballad, and Vas and Preetha danced together in the center of the dance floor. I was almost moved to tears.

But best of all, throughout the ceremony and the reception, there a grin stretched ear to ear on my cousin Vas's face. I've never seen him so happy in my life, and I'm so glad that I got to witness this joyous event of his. Especially because it was in an air-conditioned hall :-).