FirstNoel's Journal: A bittersweet anniversary...

Today, Veterans Day, is Amy and my's 5th wedding Anniversary. Uptil this past August I'd say that the time flew by. I can still remember the day like it was yesterday. I woke up around 11, went and got some lunch, came home, got dressed and was at the church by 1.

Trying to get that ring on her finger was the biggest problem of the whole day.

I'd amazing to think how innocent we were then. No idea of things to come.

I can definitely say we are doing better. We still go to support groups and stuff, and we're getting to the point where we wonder "Why are we here with these people?". Even though we are going through the same type thing as the other people, our emotions seem really distant from theirs. It's really hard to explain how. We tend to have a Buddist/Taoist philosophy, others are still very angry and bitter. One woman in group seemed actually put off by the fact we were going to Disney for our anniversary. Like we aren't suppose to be living.

I still get emotional at times, but those times are spreading out. I get a little teary eyed when I here, "Wish you were here" by Pink Floyd. Most people get upset over Tears in Heaven. Me, it's Floyd and Green Day. Bizarre.

There's a building confidence though, and growing anticipation for the future. Maybe some time in December we'll start trying again. Life for now though is returning to the new normal.

We don't have our son, but we do have each other. And today I'm going to celebrate the fact that our marriage brought him to us, even if we only had him for a short time.

Sean D.

"Were just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl..." - Pink Floyd

anniversary

[blinder]

yeah, i know about anniversaries. i have more bad ones than good ones. but it doesn't really bother me, its just the way things are.

i still haven't figured out how to deal with the bad ones properly yet. going to disney world sounds perfect... and yeah, i don't get the bitterness of that woman in your group. sounds to me like she's projecting... she is miserable and can't see how anyone could possibly be anything but miserable. its painful.

i believe your attitude is fundamentally healthy and rather inspirin

Congrats

[FortKnox]

One woman in group seemed actually put off by the fact we were going to Disney for our anniversary.

That's we went on our honeymoon. Was an absolutely fantastic time. Best vacation I had, even though its usually marked as a 'kiddie place,' it has a lot to offer adults. Hope you enjoy it there :)

Re:Congrats

[Ethelred Unraed]

I disagree. I went there when I was 4, and Goofy stole my hat.

I'm still out to get that bastard.

So be warned, FirstNoel. Goofy is a cagey one. I'd cut to the chase and give him one right in the kisser.

But otherwise have fun.

Cheers,

Ethelred

Have a good Anniversary

[elmegil]

(I have a hard time saying "happy")

Most people get upset over Tears in Heaven. Me, it's Floyd and Green Day. Bizarre.

Hardly. I think the first time I listened to NIN after losing our son I stopped very quickly. And it wasn't even the album with "Hurt" on it. I can't remember the other stuff that made me cry, but since I simply don't listen to the "typical" sappy stuff, it couldn't have been any of that.

We don't have our son, but we do have each other. And today I'm going to celebrate the fact that our

My Boss

[baldass_newbie]

my boss goes every year after Thanksgiving. Says it's awesome.
Enjoy.

(And thoughts and prayers are with you guys.)