Why not fund openSSL developers to do the same with the OpenSSL code, but including much of the cross platform options that has made it so ubiquitous. And without the silly name,
Because all those cross-platform hacks directly contribute to its bugginess. The Heartbleed bug was facilitated by a cross-platform reimplementation of malloc that was written for speed rather than security.
And also because the OpenSSL developers have been demonstrated to sit on patches for years instead of fixing bugs.
For a morbidly good time, go look at OpenSSL Valhalla Rampage, a blog highlighting some of the insanity that the OpenBSD devs are encountering as they rewrite OpenSSL into LibreSSL. It becomes clear that Theo de Raadt was right, and the OpenSSL devs are not responsible people.