That is a game? Okay, here is an opera.
Just a heads up, I'm going to be a bitch for the duration. I did pay for MY ticket, you know. The fact that I'm fucking with everyone else's experience is irrelevant to my entitled behavior. The world should adapt to me, not the other way around.
Hmm. I sense a lack of imagination. I'll be more specific: I'm going to show up wearing a tank top and sweatpants that say JUICY, chain smoke, talk loudly on my phone, make faux-clever remarks (you're obviously familiar with these) about the performance/performers, get up to pee about eight times (my bladder will be empty during intermissions ofc), and for the cherry on top, complain about someone else's child in attendance at a formal, cultured, adult event.
Thanks for ensuring "flappy crush casuals" remains a valid means of identifying incompetent undesirables that no one wants at their opera. Er, deathmatch.