As thousands of 40-year old virgins drop dead grinding in time to the naked elves dancing on their mailboxes.

Same thing goes with any article that has (insert device here) "KILLER" in it...

APACHE WAVE!!!

ENEK CHOK!!!

Damn you Microsoft!!!

Tim Berners-Lee: Vinton, you see this, all this shit?
[Holds up the list of all the registered IPv4 addresses, and drops it on his desk]
Tim Berners-Lee: It's not your fault.
Vinton: [Softly, still staring off] I know...
Tim Berners-Lee: No you don't. It's not your fault.
Vinton: [Serious] I know.
Tim Berners-Lee: No. Listen to me son. It's not your fault.
Vinton: I know that.
Tim Berners-Lee: It's not your fault.
[Vinton is silent, eyes closed]
Tim Berners-Lee: It's not your fault.
Vinton: [Vinton's eyes open, misty already] Don't fuck with me Tim. Not you.
Tim Berners-Lee: It's not your fault.
[Vinton shoves Tim Berners-Lee back, and then, hands trembling, buries his face in his hands. Vinton begins sobbing. Tim Berners-Lee puts his hands on Vinton's shoulders, and Vinton grabs him and holds him close, crying]
Vinton: Oh my God! I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry Tim!