Here in Manitoba, MTS not only gives me unlimited 12 mbps ADSL (sometimes spiking up to 32!) but (actual) unlimited 4G on my phone anywhere in the province. And free hotspot access throughout Winnipeg. Internet / Phone are about $50 each. Only downside is that they block port 25 on residential connections.

Maybe you should consider moving west.

Does Poe's Law apply to capitalists too?

I honestly can't tell if you're serious.

Nope. We're related to every living thing on this planet full stop .

After all, we all share the same ancestor if you go back far enough.

Shit, is it behind my bus pass or my food credits card?

Oh, shit, you mean the state-issued photo ID that costs money (that some folks can't afford, living paycheck to paycheck) and requires one to take the entire day off work (again, that some folks can't afford) to get on a weekday?

Check your privilege.

Oh please. Go talk to someone who has experienced slavery (plenty of people in the world) and you ask them if they'd agree.

Being taxed for services that benefit the community you are part of thereby directly or indirectly benefiting you is not slavery. You aren't working for free, you are being paid in social capital. You have a safety net. You benefit from a cooperative, helpful and happy society. You get all sorts of direct benefits like roads and schools and knowing the hamburger you're eating isn't going to contain 10% earthworms.

Nobody is forcing you to participate. If you don't like the way that a civilized society works and would rather go back to tribal times, you're free to leave. Head over to Somalia, the libertarians paradise.