Present readers/fans excluded.

Only 41 comments, but read this fucking story at negative 1.

I can't string together profanity profane enough and I'm on the profanity blacklist AND I strongly dislike to the point of hatred certain aspects of this website.

[Blasphemous phrase normally reserved for spanish curses]

God fucking damnit. Don't compare suffering! You anti-social fucktards. You don't do that seriously, it's like jacking off in a gym sock, at best useless, at worst a mortal sin. Fuck! The whole it could be worse thing is only to be used as a segue into black comedy. *sigh*

There's a death toll of over 110,000 you soulless fuckheads.

Pudge/Cliff, how the hell do you resist the urge to lay down the SQL DELETE command? You have way more tolerance/patience than I do. Props to you guys. I humbly request that you(and anyone else with mod points) mod my post into oblivion, because it deserves it. Hell, use overrated. I don't care.

God damned pig-nosed sister fucking inbred fuckers who have sheep on the side, lubricated with cow feces fresh from the pasture. There "Cha-Cham!" You happy, I just justified you sanitizing your internet experience and for a good cause. Hell your I'm a little boy dwelling in my parents basement schtick is downright sane compared to some of this shit,

I'm posting this under threat of beating.

Here's the idea. I took a screenshot of one of my desktops(gurlach[long story involving state government and odd names encountered while temping for DHHR vaguely connected to the default password first given to me for CVS]), if I had a digital camera, it would be a picture of my workplace, with self-portrait picture of me as the wallpaper... but I don't have one.

Now, I can't do this by myself. What I want you to do is set this screenshot as your wallpaper, snap a picture(or screenshot if you have no digital camera like me) of it, and post a link to it in the comments. Now, I'd like the next person to do the same thing with that image, and so on and so on. Kinda like a house of mirrors(last one is gonna be my new desktop). I'll update this as it goes on.

Feel free to copy it. This was inspired by someone(I think Ellem?) posting a picture of their monitor with the wallpaper set to a picture of Blinder's monitor displaying a picture of Ellem rocking out.

The source of the baroness picture is an old SomethingAwful contest I didn't take part in.

Series:
First picture
Panther meets Cobra

I bought a DS. I'm a consumer whore. My criteria for the purchase was the following: "Is it in stock?"(And I stacked the odds by going to the Gamestop on N. Charles). If Nintendo wanted to win this round, they should've bundled the new WarioWare with it. Yes, I'm just trying to save myself $30 and 2 months of waiting, but my advice is also helpful! Anyway, NOA are bastards. I'm looking forward to this game(and FF:CC) like I used to look forward to Christmas and Half Life 2.

I'll probably end up with a PSP too, but this largely depends upon Square-Enix. Wow, do I ever have a sick level of loyalty to the brands I got hooked on when I was younger(*puff* *puff* on a Camel filter).

Ummm... anyway also on the Video Game front, Viewtiful Joe 2 is disappointing. It's a good game... but not nearly as good as the original. It's also not nearly as hard(or as stylish, you just beat down bosses with the RH1H once you get it). Those save point complaints about the original? Completely and mercilously addressed. You now get to save about every 5-10 minutes. It also does something that really really fucking annoys me. When you go back into the Save/Joe Must Go On/Power Up menu from the Power Up menu, it displays a loading screen... on the Gamecube. Which is wrong. And it's an obvious loading screen too, with a meter on the bottom, not the stylish old-school movie looking counter. Argh! I hate load times... soooo much. I burn with hatred for them.

Anyways... not much up with me.

Terror of Mechagodzilla that is.

Many people would look at a film like Terror of Mechagodzilla and view it as a sub-B movie at worst, at best as a highly amusing B movie. How these people fail to see the all important life lessons taught by this masterwork is completely beyond me. Yes, dear readers, it's not only one of the best films ever, it also has a lot to teach.

To those of you unfamiliar with the film, it opens with scenes from the previous godzilla film; "Godzilla vs Mechagodzilla." Two godzillas square off, thunderdome style. Godzilla is fighting not Rodan(the Mighty), not King Ghidorah(uhh.. the King), not even Manda(the Terrible)... no my friends he fights himself, as we all must fight our own demons and as our egos must fight our ids.

Yet the film makers have a suprise for us, for to only fit such an obvious observation into a work, even using such high devices a metaphor, would be the act of a hack like Sigmund Freud. No, no dear readers, they go beyond, for a blast of Godzilla's nuclear fire reveals that while his opponent may resemble him, may even be his dark side, he's also mechanical, symbolizing the evil not only in ourselves but the evil our technology is capable of.

As the credits roll, Mechagodzilla's head spins, a beautiful omage to the Exorcist, further cementing that he represents both technology and the dark sides of our very souls, even if whether he is an emissary of the devil himself remains unclear. This head spinning generates a shield of darkness, which godzilla(representing our good halves and the good inherant in nuking pacific islands) flings himself against, only to be thrown backwards and pummeled by Mechagodzilla's impressive weaponry. Godzilla of course collapses into power lines and chirps plaintively. Is it mere coincidence dear readers that this mirrors just about every relationship this author has had? Or is it simply a convienant allegory I may use to describe my past failures in this arena?

Godzilla, though bloody, and even though he should be dead, stands, for good can never truly be defeated, crosses himself and rips Mechagodzilla's head off. He has defeated his dark side, he has triumphed over our demons, and he has proven that you can be brutal and still be good. An explosion ensues and we fade out to water, a classic symbol of peace. Powerful symbolism. Fire, the explosion, change, war, juxtaposed with water, tranquility, peace.

Welcome to Terror of Mechagodzilla. The opening scenes, and the monster battles throughout the film set not only the tone of the picture, but also the macrocosm against which the microcosm of individual character is drawn.

Ok, ok, cut it. I'm just to the credits and I don't think I can keep this level of sheer pretentiousness up(that's a lie, if anyone wants me to do the whole film like the above just say so and I will). In all seriousness this movie is bad, delightfully bad. Brilliantly, sublimely bad. Here's everything you can *actually* learn(as opposed to shit you can kinda link to) from this movie:

Mad Scientists typically lair like Batman, in mansions or mad science caves.

Never discount a mad scientist when his work revolves around giant killer monster control. He will seek revenge.

The typical family of a mad scientist is really supportive.

Spacemen from the third planet(what's gonna get sucked into a blackhole, yea baby, yea) have a thing for third planets

Spacemen are bullet-proof.

Godzilla don't like no one fucking up Tokyo but him.

Utility workers are like Caddyshack Gophers. Always popping their heads out of holes at the most convienant moment for the story.

True lust cares not for little facts like whether or not the girl is an evil cyborg.

A giant supersonic wave oscillator will defeat giant sea dwelling dinosaurs.

All villains laugh maniacially.

If all of your friends and coworkers think the person you're interested in is an evil spy, you've just revealed your government's supersecret plans to her, and they just got sabotaged... you should really listen to them.

Giant monsters still gesticulate. Do motions like "Aww yea," "Rockin'," "Bruce Lee bring it on," and the "Happy dance." Unless they're robotic.

Giant monsters fight using one of the following: the girly bitchslap, a superpower, weapons, wrestling or sumo.

Models are ineffective against men in rubber suits.

Ok, a number of things have unbelievably pissed me off(this is actually, really, really hard to do. I've only been in an even remotely comparable state three times before). I wasn't at all angry three days ago, disappointed, yes... but not angry. Then came Richard's entry before his latest, which wasn't perfect, but it wasn't exactly horrid either, and the responses to it. Hackles didn't go up to much. The one of my good friends screwed me fairly badly. Then a conversation with my dad. Then a forwarded e-mail from him. Then Bethanie's JE(and I'm truly sorry for letting any venom slip through[you were just the last one to tap a very minor vein of irritation that's been there for a while], it really isn't directed at anyone here or anyone or any group in particular). On top of all of this... I haven't had a cigarette in two days because I'm trying to quit(and I'm about ready to say fuck that).

I just can't be here for a while. So rather than rant and rave and slowly go into a downward spiral of increasing venom and alienation when what I'm angry about doesn't really involve anything I'd be ranting about. I'd rather take a break now, do some more worthwhile and positive things with my time(like volunteer work) for a bit, work, rant and "live" off some of this to become quasi-normal again, and hope Josh get's his thing going by about the same time I'm in a stable state.

I just can't take anything remotely political right now w/o going into a hulk like rage.

I'm going to wake up and regret the 4 comments I last posted.

So, I'm off for a bit. Before I post more things I'll regret and don't really mean. Truly sorry for any offense.

Comments are enabled for rants, well wishes and what not. BBL.

If you ever want to run this, don't buy the digium cards. They're based on an original design, which was public domained by the creator(I told this to Mekkab in brief). Here's the link to the card design.

Err... Ethelred's stunt double. He's the Air Supply of Metal. Stout *really* sticks with you, hence why it's such a good investment.

I need to say this again, our waiter sucked. I've gotten better service from the French... in paris. He also kept looking at us like we were insane and giving out free "you've been drinking too much" cokes. I thought it was really odd that he gave one to blinder. Him being a teetotaler and all.

Anyway, here's the last political thing I'm going to post in a while. My side lost. I could whine and rant and rage or be snarky and sing the canadian national anthem in french, or I can accept it. As much as I'd love to see the looks I'd get for belting out "O Canada! Terre de nos aïeux" while walking down the street, I think just accepting it is better.

We lost, big time. It happens, democracy is two wolves and a sheep deciding what's for dinner, but unlike the sheep we're not going away. We live here too, and 49% of us don't like where this country is heading.

Ok, not really, just half a decade.

Me and Blinder were quiet... except during musical conversations. In which case Blinder began to talk.... but we *WERE* plotting. Zombies were mentioned... and my baggy dark undereyes apparently were not good enough to qualify as pseudo-undead.

Sielwolf... hitler youth all grown up. Whatever image you have of him, inverse it and insert an image of the exorcist. I've never seen a head turn around 360 degrees while spouting references to japanese films before.

Mekkab and Cy Guy... Walked me to a cab, but only Mekkab bought me a beer.

GMHowell/Joe/Angie... Well now, Joe is really a dog. Secrettss....

Waiter... sucked.

Irish cop at train station... ruled. Buy a cup of coffee at McDonalds he said, right before I boarded the train... at 3am(0300 hours to you military people). I can still walk Officer McSomething. Don't crimp my style. It's a train, not a car.. ok.. it's a car, but not the kind you drive.

All in all, everyone is a good egg. I barely talked, 'cept to Mekka da B, while doing that which is forbidden by the sacred band, but I laughed alot.

Somehow I feel the need to say, "Baltimore Internet Geeks represent" and flash the sign of the devil.

G'night folks, and enjoy the dead baby milk-fed cow.

I completely agree with what Sam said... but I'm young, I must vote my heart and ideals. I am not voting for Kerry, because I don't think he's the best compromise for the executive, better than bush, yes, but even Nader is better than Bush. I fail to see, and have failed to see for over a year now, how anyone could wholeheartedly support George Bush.

In a scant few hours, here on the east coast, where I live. The polls will open, and I will cast my vote. I've been tempted to do as my mother, an early voter in WV, did and vote straigth democratic as a protest vote against the religious right.... but that sits ill with me.

I am however voting against every Republican running as a Bush sycophant(MD residents know exactly who I'm talking about) as a protest vote, abstaining a bit and voting as I will for the rest.

Once I do that... I'm hopefully done with politics for at least two years. I plan on eating, drinking and being merry at the meetup in DC, on the eve of the election, in the Capitol City.

If you spread out the wallet hits throughout the year, I would be able to buy everything I want when it's released.... but nooooo.... you got to release everything in October-December. Which means I only buy the titles I *don't* think will be available used in January-Febuary.

Bastards. And we also have the DS being released this month, which I really want to get my hands on to see if I can use my GBA flashcart with it and get full hardware access. Oh, and play with the wireless updating/access point stuff.

Why must I choose!?

Ok, yea, I'm an addict, have been since '86. Been playing PC(well, not in '86) games and console games ever since.

I try not to talk about what goes on in my day to day. It seems to demean this space somehow, anyway, I like all non-communist Americans have spent the evening drinking and watching the Bo Sox trounce the Cardinals(really buffer, you talk about dimunitive mythical creatures stealing your time as part of some vast time zone conspiracy and have, in fact, been drinking? Nooo.... we just thought you were off your meds!).

I had one hell of a friday, got into a bar fight actually, which I won(albeit with bruising, me small, me weakest link). Played much pool, and played much Ms. Pacman, got quite a few, oh what do us early 20s call it now... oh yes, digits, albeit from Hopkins girls(Haven't called, neither have they). Wierdly ran into the former bartender of Chef friend's restaurant. Got free drinks. Ended the night, outside of drunken zen, at Cobbers on Charles Street, where all of 2 other non-employees were. Played more pool, could not make a shot to save my soul. Talked to cook/bartendress about Nintendo, FF:CC to be exact, they started it. Exchanged numbers with them, because they were lamenting not having a 3rd. Bartendress took my drink in accordance to local law.

Saturday played penny poker(yea we're "girly men") with the boys. Won nearly a quarter, woo hoo!

Sunday ran out with Chef friend, had sushi. My pudgy(heh, 5' 11" 145 lbs. you got to see it to believe it[and I ironically take in only a bit more kcals a day than rdewald has shaved off....]) self got a wink, smile and nod from a few UB girls, which made me feel old. Watched the series, posted a JE. Insomnia struck, was up until well into the next day.

Fixed a few DB problems, tweaked a bit of code. Got a call from Cook/Bartendress but had to beg off. Ran into them while purchasing foodstuffs. Which brings us to today.

I rearranged furniture, did what I did yesterday, talked to my coworkers a few states away, etc. etc. Watched a good ball game, not as good as the past two, but good, and drank too much.

I'm currently figuring out what bits of Sweden would go best in my newly acquired space... I think having an Ikea receipt longer than your arm should be some kind of crime.... Anyway... That brings us to the randomness of the last JE....

They keep stealing my time! Or maybe it's the kobolds. I don't know, some mythical creature fo' sure.

See, they steal our time and they give it to other locales... They call this time zones. It's one big conspiracy.... the heart of which is in Greenwich, on the river Thames... coincidentally the production company which produced the most foul vampire Count Duckula.

Damn you Duckula! Damn you! You, like vegan, killed many of my vegetable brothers!

Anyway, the dimunitive mythical creatures, yes... they are not forgotten. Damn them for time zones. Damn them. If you live in central or mountain time zones, doubly damn them. And don't get me started on the Daylight savings langoliers, damned time eaters, or the dreaded sprites of monday.

It was like a thousand drunks cried out in joy and fell into revelry.

11-9. 5 errors total, 4 by the sox(2 concurrent). I'd go into detail, but if you cared, you would've been watching/listening to it.

If the Sox win this year, not only will there be a swath of destruction radiating out from Fenway, but next year is the Cub's turn.

Ok, I'm ashamed to admit, I was helping someone(not anyone here) with their CS homework(C++).

Basic 4 function calculator type level stuff. So they send it off to me, and I go about fixing it and commenting what I changed and why. Of course in the process I cleaned up the bracing which was, well, bad. Ok, all fixed now...

Person sends it off to the professor for input. Professor responds back good yada yada but the bracing is bad.

I use K&R, apparently a heresy within the hallowed halls of podunk academia. Bastards.

Buffer smash.

Was disappointed, I guess I was expecting something on the level of South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut, and instead got a funny version of Meet the Feebles.

There wasn't really anything in it that offended me, and that's probably part of the let down. There were quite a few good parts, but the whole was lacking I guess. I'll actually list those good parts in a comment attached to this JE.