To be fair, they do have wonderful food reviews for the under-1 crowd on page 3.

I believe it's the Washington Times that they own, Not the Washington Post.

Bulls for the Bull Throne!

So when will Banach and Tarski release their phone prototype?

Erwin Schrödinger could not be reached for comment.

That's quite a delicacy to us level 5 dwar{f,ve}s, especially with ketchup. That'll sustain you through a whole night of supporting Linux users or mining.

No, no. Harvard.

Purdue's got nothing to do with this project.

(nor does Pimento University, Alma Mater to those paragons of scholarly manhood, the Dover Boys.)

You'd think that would work, but after every migration, the bird's got to run around and hunt for another p-wing before it can do another long distance flight.

Oh, great, he's going back to Galactus to report that our planet is delicious.

Time to get out my Thumb...

Grammar/Spelling/Word Choice Nazi time.

The word you want is "lobbyist". Its root is the verb "to lobby", which lobbyists are known for doing, or the noun "lobby", where lobbyists are traditionally found.
(It may also mean an adherent of Lobbyism, but only with the initial capital.)

The word "lobbiest", is the superlative form of the adjective "lobby", meaning "having qualities similar to a lob"; "lobbiest" would thus mean "most similar to a lob". It is thus an adjective, which modifies a noun, and thus should not be used as the object of a preposition or the definite article.

To sum up for you tl;dr kids with the attention span of a gnat, it's spelled lobbyist.

On an unrelated note, do any other Grammar Nazis have tips for invading Comma Splice Russia? I've been having a bit of trouble there.

Where do the Vermicious Knids fit into this metaphor?

I thought the Internet was simultaneously the Information Superhighway and a truck;
a truck which drove on that same Information Superhighway.

We could do that, but then all our technology becomes wind-up. Especially the radios.

It's most assuredly better than arguing with a writing-desk. All mine wants to do is whine about people comparing it to a raven.

Curses! It's Captain Delicious!
My plot to make everything taste like pork is thwarted!