Some 25 million years ago, humans and vervet monkeys diverged from a common ancestor. In very rough terms, perhaps one and a quarter million human generations, or five million vervet generations, have been brought forth upon the Earth since that common ancestor lived. Of course, many differences have evolved between humans and vervets in those 25 million years: among other things, human parents choose toys for their children; vervet parents do not.

But after all that time and genetic change, and despite studies attributing human children's toy preferences to adult stereotypes, a new study by Dr. Gerianne Alexander finds that vervet males, like human boys, prefer toy trucks and balls, while vervet females and human girls prefer dolls and toy cooking pots. What's more, the vervets play with the toys much as human children do: males roll trucks on the ground, females inspect dolls (apparently) for genitalia. Previously on Slashdot: Harvard president Larry Summers and his daughter's "baby truck", Gender and gaming.

[Submitted and, of course, rejected.]

I've got a number of fans, and I've never asked for anything other than that you appreciate my comments here.

But now I need your help.

A spark jumped from my finger and now my Touchstream LP keyboard is dead. Like the parrot in the Python skit. Dead.

Windows plug-and-play doesn't recognize it at all.

So I need your help.

Can anyone either

• suggest possible repairs
• or, tell me where I can get a replacement?

Neither of these are easy: the keyboard uses capacitance to track fingers, so the spark may have burnt those out, or -- since it doesn't respond at all -- the main circuit board may be fried.

And the manufacturer of the Touchstream has been bought up, and Touchstream keyboards are no longer manufactured.

Please, Obi-Wan, ^HHHH er, Slashdot fans, you're my only hope.

I'm thinking of getting a Twiddler2: the one-handed chording keyboard.

Before I do, I'd like to hear opinions of the Twiddler2 from anyone who has used one.

Anyone?

(Cross-posted to WWdN)

The final table of the 2005 World Series of Poker started at 4pm yesterday afternoon, and wasn't finished until just after 7am today. I'm not sure, but I think that's a record. I'd call Pauly to be sure, but something tells me he's crashed out until at least Sunday.

Two qualifiers from PokerStars made the final table, and one guy, who qualified using free play points, made it to the final two tables, finished in 13th place, and won $400,000. Not bad for a freeroll!

Speaking of Pauly and PokerStars, we're doing a charity tournament on Sunday in memory of Pauly's friend Charlie Tuttle:

Charlie is from Clarksville, Tennessee and he's a twenty-six year old music enthusiast who loves hanging out and playing poker with his friends. Charlie was dealt a bad hand in life when he was diagnosed with terminal cancer, which he has been battling this past year. A couple of weekends ago, he was hospitalized because two tumors in his chest pressed up against his lungs, causing him breathing problems. I don't have to tell you how serious his condition was.

Felicia Lee, who is fighting her own battle with cancer, knows several top professional poker players, so she got several of her friends to call Charlie: John Juanda, Marcel Luske, Max Pescatori, and Barry Greenstein to name a few. In fact, when Barry Greenstein won his bracelet in the $1,500 Pot-Limit Omaha event, he dedicated it to Charlie.

As Pauly wrote:

Situations like this one make you reassess what's really important in life. Las Vegas is a city built on greed. Poker is a game that often attracts some of the lowest forms of life. However, in the past two weeks, there has been a small group of professional poker players who have earned my respect and admiration. Amidst all the darkness and debauchery, I have caught a few glimpses of the bright side of humanity. The hearts of some of the biggest sharks in Las Vegas are filled with compassion.

Thank you, Charlie, for inspiring us all. We'll never forget you.

Charlie passed away on June 22 and his friends have organized a charity poker tournament this Sunday at PokerStars. It's going to be a lot of fun, and I hope to see lots of WWdN readers there.

Details:

SUNDAY, JULY 17th
18:00 EDT (15:00 CDT)
PokerStars
Buy-in is $20 — all of it goes to charity.
"WPBT Charlie Tournament" under Tourneys -> Private tab in the lobby

I'm playing around with the idea of getting a laptop and (geek warning) some sort of VR glasses instead of a screen.

Optimally, I'd like something with the form factor of a Sharp Zaurus, but with a hard drive and standard ports.

Basically, I want a "real computer" that I can put in my pocket. To use the VR glasses, I'd need standard USB ports and the ability to use a standard video card.

Is this too bleeding edge? What are my options for a really small laptop, possibly without a screen?

This is slashdot, so I know you guys have some good ideas, and a good sense of what's possible.

I'm sure this is just begging for vandalism (unless those douchebags have grown up and finally kissed a girl) . . . but there is an error on my Wikipedia page that needs to be corrected. I'd do it myself, but that's against Wikipedia editing policy.

I am not in Brother Bear. Willie Wheaton, Wil Wheaton, Jr., and Reginald Maudling (Mrs.) are all not me. I've tried to get this taken off imdb, but someone (well-intentioned, I'm sure) keeps putting it back, and Wikipedia editors (also well-intentioned) are putting Brother Bear back up . . . so we're in an infinite improbability loop, and my towel is getting dirty.

Would someone please correct that, and cite this journal entry so it doesn't get corrected back?

I've been talking to that person again. I still want to keep things at arms length, but we're talking again. I'm a bit worried that I need to set a countdown clock until the next blow up, but maybe that is what will keep me from getting to close and getting called out again.

I'm talking about my last JE. I was so pissed off when I wrote it, that I haven't been back to /. since. The only reason I'm here now is because that person wanted to me check out someone elses JE. My life seems better now. I've been able to say anything I want, to anyone who will listen, and no one gets offended. I still like that friend, but things are much more simple when we don't talk every day. Like I said in my last post, we smile as we pass, we make small talk, and we keep our daily lives from each other. Man, we haven't argued in months... 5 months to be exact.

The same researchers have previously mentioned other ways to get around Mendel. See abstract #34.

Almost as interestingly, this discovery could undercut the deleterious mutation hypothesis theory of why sexual reproduction is useful, useful despite what John Maynard Smith termed its "two-fold cost", and explain the eighty-million years of asexual reproduction without extinction in bdelloid rotifers.

Also, brought to you by the letter... 3FB? DNA gets a fake fifth letter.

(This was submitted to Slashdot and rejected, so you get to see it exclusively in my journal, or over on MetaFilter.)

Tonight, for the first time ever, I got quad Aces, and wouldn't you know it, I failed to get paid.

Here's the story...

I'm playing over at ESPN, trying to qualify for their big tournament, the winner of which gets a seat in the main event of the World Series this June.

I bust out three players in the first hand of this single table tourney, so I'm sitting at around $4000 in chips, and the remaining 6 players are around $1000 each.

I'm dealt "Big Chick," As Qs, in late position. It's raised twice before my turn to act, and I limp in, just calling.

Flop comes Ac 4c Ad, so I've got a set, and I'm sitting pretty. Everybody checks it around, and I check too, slow playing it, making sure not to scare anybody off.

The Turn comes: 8s. First guy bets at it, two guys fold, another guy raises it, and I call. Initial raiser calls as well.

The River: Ah.

I've got AAAAQ!

First guy makes a bet twice the size of the pot. The guy to my right raises him. I'm thinking they've each made boats. I raise it again.

First guy goes all in. Guy to my right goes all in.

I'm waiting for my action dialog to pop up on the screen so I can crush these guys with my Quads... And waiting... Waiting... The dialog never comes.

About 30 seconds later, my client reconnects with the server, and I see my hand auto-folded by the computer due to my delay, and the winner has AAA88, beating AAA44.

I totally owned those guys.

It would have been a great story.

I guess I'll forever be telling the even better poker story about the time I held 4 Aces and a Queen, and folded the hand.

"When you wanted me, I figured I had, or would have down the road, better prospects than you. Um, things didn't work out as bright and shiny as I hoped. Now I'd, you know, be willing to settle.

"Ok, actually, I really don't even think of you anymore, and your name doesn't still make me pause and wonder 'what if', if it ever really did, (it doesn't, even though the mere thought of me is still like a fresh punch in the gut for you after all these long withered years).

"But if it consoles you to think that you cross my mind on lonely white nights at three a.m. and I feel some sort of vague formless regret -- honestly, any regret I feel is more for my lost youth than for you per se, at this point you just kinda symbolize that lost youth for me, like an old 'Letter' sweater from highschool or a copy of the program for that play we were in together, or those pictures of guys with long sideburns that you know instantly are from the time of the Nixon Administration --, well, you always were the sentimental sort who wrote poetry and believed bathetic crap like 'true love', so keep on with what's essentially your form of mental masturbation if it makes you feel better."

"Ok, stop crying, it always annoyed me when you cried because it made me feel like I was supposed to do something and what did you want me to do, I mean, you were nice and fun and all that --- yes the sex was good, why do you always ask about that --but, come on, we never -- hell, you especially never really expected it to last, I mean we travelled in different circles and you weren't Jewish, not that that's a big deal to me, but Jesus, your family -- please stop crying, ok, so sometimes on occasion I miss you, is that what you wanted to hear?

"Ok, so sure, sometimes I think of you, but really, if I'm the 'one who got away' for you, don't you sometimes stop to think there's one who got away for me too, and it's only natural that rather than think of you when I'm lonely -- yes, yes, yes, sometimes I do think of you, and you were really nice. Yes! Yes I mean it! Why would I lie now?? Really. I do mean it.

"Yes, you were really nice. Ok?

"And it was great talking to you. Sure, sure, same time, next year, give me a call like always. No, I do like hearing from you. I do.

"Ok, you have a nice night too."

silicon.com reports that 'the US Department of Homeland Security has decided to trial RFID tags' .... 'to track both pedestrians and vehicles entering the US to automatically record when the visitors arrive and leave in the country.'

Welcome to the Land of the Free!, number 4c62c570-70c5-11d9-9669-0800200c9a66! You'll be reflecting at 2450 MHz, enjoy your stay!

The article goes on to explain that

The testing phase will continue until the spring of next year. The exact way RFID will be used with the travellers is not yet known.

. . . .

US Under Secretary for Border & Transportation Security, Asa Hutchinson, said in a statement: "Through the use of radio frequency technology, we see the potential to not only improve the security of our country, but also to make the most important infrastructure enhancements to the US land borders in more than 50 years."

What is your frequency, Kenneth?

Remind me again why the most talented foreign scientists are no longer doing research in America?

And how soon will the "success" of this program lead to tagging government employees and contractors as a prelude to tagging all citizens?

String theory is the trendy pursuit for the physicists in my field. It's untestable and, as famously put, "not even wrong." While it's done some great things for the mathematicians, it's lead entire generations of physicists to pursue it with very little to show for it. Expect more about string theory in this journal as well as related topics to physics.

On craigslist.org I see under "Computer Gigs", an ad for a "senior level web programmer" with, additionally, "exceptional Microsoft SQL 2000 administration... skill".

By "senior", the ad explains, they mean "someone with at least 5 to 6 years working experience in Microsoft Platforms. Microsoft certification is a plus."

The offer requires a minimum three month contract, with set hours of 10:30 am to 3:30 pm, Monday through Thursdays (with Fridays off). That's 20 hours a week (but without apparently the ability to time-shift or moonlight so as to accomodate another 9-5 job).

The compensation offered is $800 per month -- in other words, a "senior level web programmer" is apparently worth only ten dollars per hour.

And yes, I emailed them to confirm this, and they really do mean ten dollars per hous, twenty hours per week, minimum three month contract. And this is in the San Francisco area.

So my question is, is this what's becoming the norm, or is the job poster smoking something?

----
Addendum: As artifex2004 (766107) notes below, the job posting has been removed from craigslist.

However, another craigslist reader was er, kind enough to respond to the original listing; but I'm not sure how he calculated $12.50 an hour. (And no, I didn't make the response.)

Also, for those wondering about my email with the job poster, this is his reply to my query confirming his ad, with addresses elided:

Hi

Yea exactly we are a small start up. And that is our offer

Thanks

----- Original Message -----
From: orthogonal's address elided
To: job poster's address elided, too
Sent: Monday, January 03, 2005 2:42 PM
Subject: Wanted: SQL 2000 Admin With ASP, HTML skills

>>
>> From your ad at: http://www.craigslist.org/sby/cpg/54284856.html
>>
>> You're offering $10.00 per hour for a senior level web programmer?
>>
>> Quoted:
>> This is a senior level web programmer position. You will program and
>> manage our existing database driven community portal.
>>
>> We are looking for someone with at least 5 to 6 years working
>> experience in Microsoft Platforms. Microsoft certification is a plus.
>>
>> Working hours will be 10.30am to 3.30pm with Fridays Off. Salary is
>> $800/month. Minimum 3 months contract required.

There is a saying that goes something like "when you feel that you are the only one you know who is sane, chances are it's actually you who are insane." Likewise, my father used to tell me that the only common item in all my failed ventures was... well, me. I took this to heart, and I apply it to the world around me today. I live a happy life, with a great wife, two kiddos and a really decent job. While like most, I can spend all day complaining about things; overall I'm pretty happy with only superficial complaints.

I have my problems. I talk too much. I offend the easily offended. I sometimes piss people off with my flippant attitude and comments. I'm not the greatest husband, father, or friend, but I'm certainly not the worst. In the name of humor I get myself in trouble sometimes. The instance I'm writing about now goes something like this... A friend tells me that she only has a couple of bucks left in her bank account. We discuss the matter in my cube for around ten minutes, and I even offer to loan her some money, out of genuine concern for her wellbeing. Here is where the trouble comes in. Another friend comes over, and for some reason he and I start talking about money. He says that he's got some extra cash, and I suggested that he share a little of that cash with my buddy. I think I said something like "Well, if you've got so much money, why don't you give some to [my buddy]." In no way did I imply the financial situation of my buddy. I rattled off that sentence as an inside joke. In my eyes, there is no harm, no foul. The friend with extra cash thinks my commentary is in regards to his bragging, and my buddy gets the other side of the joke.

Only the buddy doesn't get the joke. She does, but she's offended by it. She thinks that I'm breaking her confidence and exposing her to mockery. She says that I'm "throwing her under the bus." She says "you always do that", "you do that to make yourself feel bigger", "you bring up sh*t to embarrass me." I keep telling her, "Look, I think it's funny. You enjoy it when I do the same thing to other people, but you freak out when I toss around stuff regarding you" I also told her that if she doesn't like it, she has two options... stop telling me stuff she doesn't want me to make light of, or stop talking to me. Over and over again we've had this discussion, and yesterday it happened again. I was standing at her cube and she informed me that a coworker on our floor had two bags of Halloween candy. I asked her if there was any good stuff in the bags. She said she didn't know but that she heard there was lots of tootsie rolls. She then said that she didn't like plastic chocolate. The conversation continued for two or three more lines, and then we both headed down to the candy in question. Once we got there, I noticed a bunch of starburst. I asked her if starburst was one of the plastic candies that she didn't like. Then, because I have a habit of making jokes, she assumed that I was "doing it again", and got all pissed off.

Now, I've thought about this for a while, and I'm still confused by why she got so frigg'en pissed off, but then it hits me! She has a history that demands she destroy every relationship she is in. I have a lot of dedicated friendships. Many have held together for years, and I'm constantly adding to the list. All in all, I've disjoined with only one friend in the past, oh say... 5 years. HER! She is constantly complaining about how alone she is. Yet the only common piece in all her relationship failures is... well... her.

I give up. I'm not going to me mean to her. I'll listen to her stories. I'll smile at her in the hall. But just like everybody else in her life, I'm tired of dealing with her constant freak outs. I'm done. Bye bye.