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Comment That one Law & Order episode (Score 1) 98

Where a service promised to email personal messages to friends and family "left behind" after the rapture. The three members who founded it would log in every day, assuming that if at least two of them failed to log in, being god-fearing Christians, the rapture has occurred. You can see where this is going.

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Comment The real worry for many people (Score 1) 478

And it's been around since at least the 1980's, is the worry that you'll be the one the ones that just misses out on the discovery of practical age reversal and effective immortality. Lying there in your hospital bed, listening to NPR, hearing that the cure for aging should be on the market within the next three years and it's for real this time and that's when you flatline. (His last words were "Oh, son of a bitch!")

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Comment Brand that shit! (Score 1) 405

You see in the pics in the article how the headphones say BOSE in letters you could read literally from across a football field? Where does it say "Surface" on the tablet? That little foam handle? Slap "Surface" on every side of those protective frames. This is the NFL! They don't do subtle.

Even better, go algorithmic. Whenever a Surface tablet appears on the screen, slap a "Surface, The Official Tablet of the NFL" graphic in the corner.

And what, no one thinks to stick an "It's not an iPad, it's a Surface" Post-It somewhere in the damn booths?

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Comment Do Everything Wrong Day (Score 3, Insightful) 441

There should be a Do Everything Wrong Day where students and teachers alike do things like play dodgeball, cops and robbers, offer pats on the back and hugs, bring copies of Mad Magazine and Guns and Ammo to school, call each other names, walk to school, say they look nice today, and so on and so on. Then everyone lodges official complaints against everyone else, so administrators now will either have to either suspend everyone and then crawl through hundreds if not thousands of hearings, or agree that a lot of the rules against these things are ludicrous if not completely anti-American.

The slogan for the day? "If everyone is in trouble, nobody is."

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Comment The oblig. quote from Snow Crash (Score 5, Insightful) 233

When it gets down to it — talking trade balances here — once we've brain-drained all our technology into other countries, once things have evened out, they're making cars in Bolivia and microwave ovens in Tadzhikistan and selling them here — once our edge in natural resources has been made irrelevant by giant Hong Kong ships and dirigibles that can ship North Dakota all the way to New Zealand for a nickel — once the Invisible Hand has taken away all those historical inequities and smeared them out into a broad global layer of what a Pakistani brickmaker would consider to be prosperity — y'know what? There's only four things we do better than anyone else:

music
movies
microcode (software)
high-speed pizza delivery

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