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Comment At that speed... (Score 1) 20

If it were possible for Parker to do that record-setting speed and run right next to the ISS in its same orbit, the ISS would get lapped 14 times for each single orbit.

Parker could go from New York to Tokyo in minute and a half.

London to Athens in 22s.

Washington D.C to Boston in 6s.

It could get from Chicago to St Louis quicker than John Force can get a car from line to chutes.

Comment Jump, bounce, down, up. (Score 1) 187

I went out on a date with a girl, a bit late. She had so many friends. I brought my pogo stick just to show her a trick. She had so many friends.

Unannounced twister games, all players with no names. They lined up double quick, but just one pogo stick. Everyone gets to play, runaway, exposé. It was so exotic, but just one pogo stick.

Comment Scientists Create 'Living' Machines That Eat, Grow (Score 4, Funny) 107

So did I. It was easy. I'm not even a scientist. No 4-10 years of university, no multi-million dollar lab.

His name is James and he's been doing that eating and growing thing for 15 years now. It was touch-and-go for a while there. The AI kept trying to find inventive ways to kill itself and seemed to have a mind of its own that wasn't very accepting of the training programs. It's gotten much better at general purpose intelligence and autonomy but in the past few years has become prone to sudden illogical and inexplicable behavior. And there's some weird bug in the visual processing that causes cron to suspend when a video screen becomes active nearby. When the screen shuts off cron resumes but crontab has been wiped and you have to rebuild it. It's really frustrating.

I'm hoping that with a couple more years of training the AI will stabilize and - fingers crossed! - it'll get a job so I can start to realize a profit on my investment. Or at the very least the money hemorrhaging will stop. Wish me luck!

Comment Honest question... (Score 1) 156

I have been under the impression that the problem with solar as a power source wasn't the collection or direction of light but the conversion process itself, no? If that is the case, how do intensifiers or collectors help with this? Efficiency gains in collection are only going to be incremental and not Nobel Prize worthy paradigm shifts, right? The real prize is in conversion. Correct my thinking here.

Comment Oxygen causes Alzheimers (Score 1) 208

In a landmark study I'm totally sure exists somewhere, it was discovered that 100% of Alzheimers were life-long heavy users of the gas "oxygen". With this indisputable evidence in hand researchers say it looks like the end of Alzheimers is in sight. Preventative measures are easy to describe and implementation can happen in the next 5-10 years. Options range from complex operations like shifting to a methane based metabolism or switching to photosynthesis to as simple as preventing air intake to block the absorption of oxygen.

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