It is true I am generalizing the issue. It is impossible to address any sort of sociological issue without generalizing to some extent. Not all "feminists" do the things I say. Enough do, though, and the ones who aren't do not exactly make much effort to address the problems I stated. They simply prefer to shrug and act like it is the local color.
Okay, I can't disagree with this point. I really dislike PETA and the NRA because of their public extremism and tend to view the whole organization in a negative way. But I try to be careful not to extrapolate from too small a sample size. I know a member of PETA personally who does not espouse such extreme views, and since I haven't personally talked to a large percentage of members, I'm unwilling to assume they all match the profile painted mostly by the media (not blaming the media, they just tend to report the more extreme actions and beliefs of the group). On the flip side, I'm not willing to give the organization as a whole the benefit of the doubt, either.
There is a very real problem and it is not the fact we have a patriarchal or matriarchal society: it is that we have double standards and guilt. We have feminists (not just women, men as well) who believe women should be treated better but equal, and then we have men who feel somehow that they make atone for some sin by repeating it. I say no. If you want equality, you need to pony up for equality. If I have to deal with bullshit, so do you. Sorry, but that's equality. If you do not want that, then what you want is re-arranged inequality.
I don't really understand why you think women, in order to be treated equally, have to put up with sexist bullshit. You back up that supposition with the false argument that you have to put up with bullshit, so they should also. You *don't* have to put up with bullshit any more than I do. You have the same recourse they do if you feel like the environment you are in is unreasonably abusive in any way. For example, if I was in a group of all non-blacks and some or many of the members were openly racist, I would not tolerate that. In your view I should just suck it up and quit my job because I don't agree with the majority. I hope you can see how wrong that view is.
The really difficult thing in this discussion is where to draw the line between acceptable and non-acceptable behavior. There are those (like you) who would rather not have a line at all and make all behavior acceptable, which I think is a response to the belief (real or perceived) that there are those who want the line so tightly draw that almost all behavior is unacceptable. Neither is correct, there has to be a reasonable middle ground. Unfortunately, there's far too little actual reason these days, so perhaps I'm asking way too much.
"How many interviews have you been on where the interviewer explained that all your potential coworkers like to make raunchy jokes and talk about female body parts, and if you don't like that kind of environment then you should quit the interview process? I more than positively sure you've never had such an interview. So how is this hypothetical interviewee supposed to know what the environment is like when they accept a position (ignoring the fact that the company would almost surely be sued for intimidating/offending/harassing a job applicant)?"
I would say asking is a good start. It is in fact quite easy to ask a number of questions which would smoothly express the situation, if you are likely to be easily bothered by it. Further, there are a number of ways to dance around the topic on the employer's part, too; but I do believe it ought to be considered the interviewee's responsibility here. If they are the ones who are going to be easily offended, it falls upon them to decide if the situation is for them. Not everyone else to adapt to shield them from all possible offense.
That's not the world we live in. If I were interviewing a woman (or anyone, for that matter) and she asked me if the environment was sexually charged ("like a frat house"), I would politely decline to answer and immediately talk with HR after the interview. Sure, maybe she's just trying to get an idea of whether she would feel comfortable or not, or maybe she's looking for an opportunity to sue and get a small settlement. The question itself is inappropriate given the legal environment that exists right now, and no answer I could give would be the right answer.