i starting reading your question and was wondering when i penned this question to slashdot... but i realize that there are many of us out there with similar stories.
i too have worked in IT fulltime for 12 years, and i've always been in positions which required working above and beyond the standard 40 hour work week. in the beginning i used to envy my 40 hour co-workers, but then i started putting things into perspective:
+ i don't punch a timeclock.
+ although i am consistent in my arrival and departure time, my time is flexible enough that i can come and go as i please.
+ my lunch hour can be as short as 30 minutes, or as long as a couple of hours.
+ i'm often taken out to lunch by various vendors(existing and potential) to discuss new products, services, etc.
+ the company pays for my cell phone(i know it's a leash, but i'm also not limited in my usage).
+ i get equipment refreshes with a higher frequency then most users(save owners and other bigwigs).
+ i have more technology in my cube/office than several co-workers combined.
+ i can wear what i want.
+ i usually set my own agenda for my work week.
+ i'm often involved in interesting projects, many of the involving exploratory research regarding cost, deployment, etc, stuff that actually is challenging.
+ i'm a techno-god in the eyes of my co-workers.
+ i get a regular paycheck.
+ i have ability to authorize up to $5000 purchases per P.O.(no limit on number of P.O.s... how did that happen?...)
+ i get reimbursed on work related expenses.
+ i get paid vacations and official holidays.
+ i get to go home to my family and leave work behind from time-to-time.
of course on the downside:
- i get stuck holding the bag when technology misbehave.
- i have to work long hours from time to time.
- sometimes there just isn't someone to hand things off to, so i have to see things thru to the end.
- there often isn't anyone else to blame.
- i don't always get compensated for my time appropriately.
etc...
etc...
i can go on and on with the plusses and minusses, but the bottomline for me, i'm better off workin' for the man, and not for myself. you need to run a +/- list for yourself and see how it shakes out.
work less? and you're thinking of going into business for yourself? pull your head out of your ass!
your gonna work harder and longer when you work for yourself, for a while(months, maybe even years)...
and you bring your work home with you...
and you can't take a day off 'cause your sick...
and you can't just up and quit cause your boss is an asshole...
why don't you ask for a different compensation schedule? or maybe a flex schedule? track how many hours you work(regular and overtime) and see if you qualify for overtime pay in your state/country. ask your employer to pay for your cell and home internet connection(so it's less money out of your pocket). start becoming creative about how you are compensated for your work, and maybe not just money...
sometimes i wish i was a bricklayer: only responsible for making sure that my shit is level, straight and plumb, and be able to leave all my work behind at the end of the day, but alas, that's not my lot. oh well, maybe the next reincarnation.