Social networking sites are not designed for privacy, they are designed to do open social networking. If you don't want to do that, don't use the site, or limit what you put on the site to things you are comfortable sharing in that fashion.
Multiply.com is a cross between social networking and livejournal. It's always given users control over who can read postings. Posts can be read by everyone, or limited by relationships, such as family, friends, online buddies, professional contacts, a list of specific users, etc. This is what facebook has now added. Users can put their friends into lists based on the nature of the relationships, and control which users and lists can read what is posted.
The analogy in the real world is I can tell my best friends something and other people won't find out unless he's sloppy or someone gets him drunk or uses social engineering tricks. In facebook that means mentioning it online to others or letting other people use the computer where he's logged into facebook and they snoop.
E-mail is just as vulnerable because people leave themselves logged in or can be sloppy and mention data to others. If something is so personal there can't be a record of it but must be told, phone calls or in person are the ways to go.