James A. A. Joyce's Journal: A Comment Which Embodies My Trolling Philosophy

Some perceptive Anonymous "Coward" posted this insightful comment in response to an ignorant post.

Here it is if you can't be bothered to click the link:

'Why must we fellow trolls fight amongst each other over a silly piece of cyber real estate known as first post? If we worked together, first post may be shared by all, bringing peace and joy to all trolls, from the crapflooders and page wideners, to the crafty celebrity gay story trolls and yes, even GNAA can have it's spot in troll heaven. It's Troll Tuesday, our hallowed day. Save your insults for the infidels and Lunix zealots, for they never shall know true peace, the satisfaction of a +5 Insightful copy and paste, or the thought of hundreds of n00bs clicking on a gay porn link labeled as "In Case of Slashdotting...".'

This guy is about as right as you can get. We have to unite. Except for the GNAA, because they're lame wanabee crapflooders. Though they may follow the ideal of manual trolling detailed in my predictive manifesto, they are so immensely crap at following through that they should have their keyboard hands removed immediately.

Of equal interest to me (as an ardent anti-GNAA protestor) is the parent comment of that mentioned above:

'"Wanabee trolls?" Our organisation has been established far longer than yours. However, your organisation reached its peak with its first post, and is now a diseased mule, waiting to be shot by it's owner. Your laughable attempt at a trolling organisation has required me to have brain surgery from a cancer than developed in my mind when I was browsing your posts - the cancer spread when I looked at even more. At that point, I was placed in a coma and rushed to insensive care, where I had my organs removed in a dire struggle to save my life. Upon looking at my pus-infected bladder upon waking, I saw GNAA written on it, and my knob exploded in a foreskin of cum.'

While this is provocative and argumentative, I still agree with its core sentiments and its powerful use of imagery.