caffeineHacker's Journal: Why Java Sucks

Well I read something about LGPL being 'viral' to Java. I say screw Java. I tried to do Java programming today, after a year of being completely away from it. I built a simple program to get random numbers and pass them between classes, and IT COMPILED the first time...BS!! Programs are supposed to be chaulked full of so many errors you spend twice as long debugging as you did writing it(Except Perl). Anywho, Java sucks...nuf' said. If anything is viral it's Java itself. Did you know it was originally made for household appliances. It's in your toaster watching you as I randomly type words. It's in your TV watching all the smut ads they have nowadays. It's even in your computer whilst your merrily typing away to convert your porn collection into ASCII art so you can view it in Lynx. It's an evil, bastardized 'language' made by Bill Gates and his borg buddies. Okay so it's Sun Microsystem's, which is supposedly in competition with Microsoft...but we all know it's a front. Microsystems and Microsoft have the first 6 letters in common, coincedence? I think not. Let's delve further into the facts that prove Sun == Microsoft(In a C++ Object pointer sense, not a copy all the variable idiocy sense). First is foo. Second is bar. This is Percent-S works at both companies, while Fred and Bar throw midgets down Bob Barker's Plinko board of sexual harassment. If you ask me it's a big conspiracy orchestrated by the government, who in turn is just a puppet, a marionate if you will, whom the evil 'God' manipulates into dancing to his chipper little tune. Damn Java, may it burn in hell with Bill Gates and the Pope!!!!!!! Anywho...I'm typing quite poorly today since I'm tired as hell, I can't sleep, or the clowns will eat me(And yes I meant sexually). So if any of this makes sense you should probably see a psychiatrist and psychologist as well as a family therapist, it'll really help you to hate the mental health care workers.