Patchw0rk F0g's Journal: Yep, entering the programmers' world.

I can't see anyone reading this, so it's merely for my edification, and as a time-capsule back to this moment.

After four months of haggling, hoop-jumping, and enough red tape (albeit not carbon nanotube red tape) to produce an finite but very large number of space elevators, I have finally accomplished my goal. I have prised from the Ontario, Canada provincial government's death-grip the means of continuing on as a viable designer in the post-print techno-bubble we're living in.

Witness: one (1) paid-for web development course, in PHP, CSS, HTML, training in the associated software and other alphabet languages, Wordpress, focus on multi-device design, etc., etc. etc. And no Flash! Well, Flash animation (clients still want pretty banners!) but it's all HTML5 in the course, not Flash. Yikes, yippee and a big yes!

Witness: one (1) paid-for copy of Adobe Creative Suite 5.5. Not the wussy Design Edition... not the Web Edition.... the Master Collection. The whole she-bang. Woot, I say, WOOT!

Witness: one (1) paid-for lap-top, P6200 Dual Core, 4 GB RAM, 750 GB hard drive, 17.3" mind-blowing screen. (DVD, wireless, etc. I've got Windows 7 64-bit set up with two wireless adapters. Through-put? Pretty fucking good for a basement apartment.) My old laptop (Toshiba Satellite 1900) was chewing gravel. I was getting sick (literally) of the desk fan blowing on it to keep it from overheating. Though that popping sound it made before kicking off for the night was kind of cute.

The result? One happy Patch! Just goes to show: if you keep on keeping on, don't give up, use the system and don't abuse the system, and persevere, all shall come to you. Eventually. After you've lost most of your hair, all of your cool several times, and most of your still-functioning mind. And enjoyed many graphic fantasies about fire-bombing government workers' homes, offices and the occassional coffee-shop where they congregate to exchange stories about how they fucked the masses today.

Thanks, Mr. Government. Sorry you had to lose on this one, but it was a valiant effort on your part. I particularly liked how you lost all of my documentation, my proposal, and my follow-up answers to your questions. (Yes, this really could get me a job as a user interface designer. Yes, a UI designer needs to know web stuff. Really. I shit you not.) That's three paperwork snafus on one file: a definite pencil-in for a Wile E. Coyote Fuck-up Award.

But to be fair: keeping me going in circles and leaping at your every whim for four months is impressive. I'm sorry my sense of commitment and stamina just served to out-last you. But yes, thank you. I'll be sure to let you know when my salary exceeds yours. Should be about a month after my course finishes.

Later, and cheers!
Patchwork Fog