Journal: Vaccination

Every morning, I vaccinate myself against the media.

I give myself a little bit of the bacteria so that I
won't catch the full-blown disease.

Is it right? No. Not right. Necessary.

It is very risky. I am exposing myself an epidemic.
A horrible plague that has enveloped most of the
world. A little too much, and I could catch the
virus. Too little, and I won't be immune. I push the
envelope.

Newspapers and radio won't really do the job. It has
to be TV.

Yes. I'm talking about the Today Show, with Katie
Fucking Couric and Matt Lauer. It is the most popular
morning show by far, and Katie Fucking Couric is the
highest paid woman in television history. It has to
be the Today Show.

Every morning, I let some of this insipid, evil, slimy
SHIT into my body.

I watch the part of the show where they interview
"Betty" the woman who just lost a son, daughter or
husband the day before:

Katie Fucking Couric: Betty, welcome to the show.

Betty: Thank you Katie.

Katie Fucking Couric: Betty, you have known your
husband since you both were eleven years old. You
were best friends growing up, you were married when
you were twenty, and you had nine children together.
Yesterday, he was melted in a chemical explosion that
may have been caused by Osama Bin Laden. How does
that make you feel?

Betty: *sob*

Katie Fucking Couric: You now have to raise nine
children on your own. Will this be difficult?

Betty: *sob*

Katie Fucking Couric: Do you miss your husband?

Betty: *sob*

Katie Fucking Couric: Do you consider your husband to
be a hero in the War Against Terror?

Betty: *sob*

Katie Fucking Couric: Thank you for being on our
show. We take you now to the weather with that big
fat humorous black guy.

This very television show is the single most
disgusting thing in the entire world. Bar none. I
honestly can think of nothing that even comes close.

Watching it is like trying to stay afloat in a
coursing river of vomit.

I highly recommend watching it.