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User Journal

Journal Journal: An imposter on IRC! 12 is not the real eggtroll.

That is all.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Slashdot Flowchart (as seen on K5) 4

I saw this on K5 today and felt the need to share it with the world! An extra-special shout out to LookOnMyWorksYeMortalsAndDespair whose post I got this from. An even MORE special shout-out to the Slashdot crew whose Lameness Filter guarentees that the only consequence of posting this is a little odd formatting. Taco, you do suck.


             TOP SECRET   : (GROUP SLSH-1)
             EYES ONLY    : (HARD COPY ONLY)
             NEED TO KNOW : (DIRECT DEV)



|Has the feature been implemented before|_yes_
|  on Kuro5hin or another weblog site?  |     |
+---------------------------------------+     |
                   |                          |
                   no                         V
                   V                          |
    +------------------------------+          |
    |Was the feature implemented or|______yes_|
    | suggested by a known Troll?  |          |
    +------------------------------+          |
                   |                          V
                   no                         |
                   V                          |
  +----------------------------------+        |       ___________
  | Have hundreds of users suggested |____yes_|      /           \
  |the feature to CmdrTaco via email?|        +---->< WON'T SCALE ><-------+
  +----------------------------------+        ^      \___________/         |
                   |                          no                           |
                   no                         |                            ^
                   V                          ^                            |
    +------------------------------+       +-----------------+             |
    |Will the feature make Slashdot|__yes_\|Can jamie or krow|             |
    |   even more like a game?     |      /| hack it for me? |             |
    +------------------------------+       +-----------------+             |
                   |                                  |                    |
                   no                                yes                   |
                   V                         _________v________________    |
   +---------------------------------+      /  THIS FEATURE IS PERFECT \   |
   |Can CmdrTaco use his limited Perl|_yes\/  FOR SLASHDOT. IM SO GLAD  \  |
   |    knowledge to kludge it in?   |    /\   I THOUGHT OF IT!!! TIME  /  |
   +---------------------------------+      \____FOR SAILOR MOON!______/   |
                   |                                                       ^
                   no                                                      |
                   |                                                       |


Journal Journal: Slashdot Gripes 3

- posters that spell Microsoft with a $ or spell it MicroCrap or something.
- posters that glorify a feature that Linux has that BSD or Solaris as had for years, and list this reason as the most important reason to switch over
- posters that say Slackware is better because "you have to compile all of the applications for yourself"
- Rob Malda's arrogance
- frequent spelling and grammar mistakes. I'm not talking something really obscure or a minor technicallity in English, either. I'm talking substituting "loose" for "lose" or "they're"/"their"/"there". Really easily corrected mistakes. Any halfway decent fifth grader could pick up on these errors.
- people that post a mirror to a site that has been Slashdotted, which normally would be nice, but is hosted on a cable modem that is soon Slashdotted
- page widening
- random quashing of posts that don't agree with the Slashdot mindset.
- really annoying sigs
- unhumorous jokes that have to be "explained" to the audience. If your joke has to be explained, it's not funny.
- "BOYCOTT RIAA" and "I can't wait to see Episode II!" all in the same day.
- Rob Malda's childish obsession with legos.
- the Slashdot crew doesn't have any other jobs other than Slashdot, yet it seems it was better run when Rob was running it on a Multia in college in his spare time.
- the "page limit" with the subscription.
- The expulsion of Signal 11.
- ranting, paranoid articles whenever there APPEARS to be a GPL violation, with no verification whatsoever. Just a bunch of ranting posts about freedom.
- for that matter, no verification of articles at all. I wish I could count the number of times Slashdot's been scammed on two hands, but it's been so many.
- April Fool's articles on Slashdot. THESE AREN'T FUNNY. I wasn't going to explain, but whatever. Okay, let's say you run a website. On April Fool's, you post, say, ONE or TWO fake pieces of news along with the real news. This way, some people are fooled. By posting ALL fake news and "jokes", no one falls for the prank.
- no one buys Loki's games, but there is a big mystery when they go out of business.
- no NNTP frontend to Slashdot.
- direct links to bugzilla
- continuing tightening of the "troll filters" to the point where even normal posts are rejected by some stupid criteria
- self righteous posters who want everything under the sun to be Open Source, even though they have never written a line of code in their life
- whenever an article on a new scripting language is posted, all of the C users chime in "but it's not as fast as C". shortly after, all the assembly users chime in "assembly is the fastest". predictably, right after that, someone says "why don't we all just use machine code?"
- anecdotes on your grandmother using Linux to check her email and whatnot. this ALONE proves that Linux is better than Windows for ALL uses.
- cult-like devotion to Linux. reserve your fanaticism for a church, not a kernel.
- someone is not less of a person if they don't use Unix.
- posters who think that BeOS is having "a bad moment" and will surely rise to defeat all other operating systems
- posters who think Palm will open the source to BeOS for no reason at all
- people who think that Amiga isn't dead. The new virtual Amiga doesn't count.
- people who think that OS/2 isn't dead. 'Ecomstation' doesn't count.
- people who bemoan the loss of OS/2 while thinking it was a big conspiracy, completely IGNORING the fact that IBM did not advertise. we all KNOW OS/2 was technically superior to Windows at the time. You don't have to bedazzle us with tales of "running all the latest Windows and DOS applications aside native OS/2 apps". We've heard it all before. We know it WAS better.
- people who think that this is the last year ever we'll ever have to hire C++ programmers, because as we all know, Java is going to "kill it off"
- this is a good one. Completely expositionary articles such as "Surprised by Weath" in which ESR BRAGGED about how rich he was and how he wasn't going to give us any money. NO SIR.
- bitchslapping
- benchmarks that pit, say, Linux (lastest revision) against FreeBSD 3.0 or something old and useless.
- how banner ads for the site only link to other OSDN sites
- any links to
- when someone writes a comment with ^H to signify deletions
- the moderation $rtbl
- meta moderation
- people that spell Red Hat as "RedCrap"

Journal Journal: Banned! 2

This lame site has shut me down for "trolling". Don't they realize I'm only quality testing Slashcode, something that obviously has *not* been done by the Slashdot team.

Consider this post:


There are going to be trolls on any community forum. No matter how much you try to block us out, we'll keep posting. The Slashdot editors just need to accept this and move on. By trying to clamp down, you only make us work even harder to post.

Notice all the ASCII art on here? A direct result of Taco's lame Lameness Filter. Now that links are put in brackets, people work even harder to get around it and are succeeding in ways they never had before. Previously people would look at their browser to see what the link they were clicking on lead to. Now that Slashdot is doing that for them, it makes trolling even easier.

Plus you insult everyone's intelligence by having that douchebag Jon Katz continue to post. This vapid waste of space has nothing to say and takes paragraphs to get there. He's a one-trick pony and unfortunately that pony isn't very good, like the annoying uncle who keeps playing Gotcher Nose with the children.

The more you try to keep down the trolls, the more we're going to rise up and say FUCK YOU to the bullshit editors of this site. If you wanna see a community site thats properly run, go look at Come back when you finally understand people, editors.


I point out the fallacy of trying to crush the trolls and I get bitchslapped. Well, probably because of the link in my sig. But that only proves what I said above. Trolls are like water. The tighter you try to squeeze them the more they spill out all over your hands.

Check out for a (virtually) troll-free community.

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