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User Journal

Journal Journal: I've been lowendmacced

I've been lowendmacced. I feel good.

Nah, the fine folks at lowendmac.com have nothing to do with it.

I bought a Mac about three months ago, and now it's a low end Mac.

Between the decision to adopt Intel processors and drop PPC, and the bloat discontinuity between Panther and Tiger (yes, I did Tiger for a while), I've decided to downgrade to Panther and come out as a low-end Mac user.

I don' t really regret it. Buying a Mac -- I was one of the hordes to buy the Mac mini, and I bought the $600 model -- was the best bang-for-the-buck decision I could make, since draconian import taxes to Brazil would make a similar xing-ling white-box assembled-at-the-corner computer more expensive, and buying a black-boxed Dell would cost almost as much as buying an Apple locally.

A friend smuggled the mini in his hand package. Whoa, the Mac mini is the cheapest computer I could have bought. And it's quite an upgrade from the K6-with-Gentoo-and-ion3 I was using.

Anyway. Still in the Gentoo mentality of emerge -uD world everyday, I upgraded to Tiger as soon as it came out. It wasn' t smooth, but 10.4.1 was around the corner. 10.4.1 fixed some stuff, but the Beach Ball of Death and the general sluggishness was killing me.

Spotlight was useless from the get-go, and I disabled it the only known way, banning my entire hard drive from its scan list. Dashboard was actually pretty cool, but on the 256megs Mac, widgets wouldn' t appear the first time I invoked it, and they'd be eating memory like it was, uh, memory.

The whole thing sucked.

So now I'm a low-end mac user, like the ones who bought the iFruit and are still proud of their machines. It' s a good box, it's tiny -- and that helped me with the smuggling, and helped me once when I wanted to show a PowerPoint presentation with one of those built-in-the-conference-room overhead projectors with minimal hassle -- it was inexpensive and it does the work I need. TeXShop is the best LaTeX platform out there, and the PIM tools (iCal, Address Book, etc.) keep me in line. And, well, it does run Adobe Photoshop and Excel/PowerPoint. And it has Python!

Somehow, I feel a sense of pride in being a low end mac user. Liberated from the gentoo kiddie neurosis, I feel more like Jerry Seinfeld with his classic Mac lying there. It does his job and gets him from point A to B, right?

Maybe it' s because I started having a sex life that the trappings of the gentoo way of life don' t attract me anymore. My computer is not the reason I have to live anymore. I don't need to be able to brag about it, except in the sense I brag about not caring anymore.

I've been lowendmacced. I feel good.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Slashdotter's Guide to Karma Whoring 1

Have you just joined Slashdot? Has your karma dropped from "excellent" since you've been swimming against the groupthink? Here are a few notes on karma-whoring.

1. Post early. This is the key thing. Even Soviet Russia jokes might get a stab at +1 Insightful if you`re one of the very first posters. The other rules are potentialized by posting earlier, while applying some of these too late can lead to -1 Redundant mods.

2. Mirror. Before the site gets slashdotted, copy-and-paste it, with a cynical note like "site already semi-slashdotted, so..."

3. Criticize the author of the post. Most Slashdot front page stories are badly-written, and will often misrepresent the true meaning of the article. If you can't find such discrepancies, you can always complain about the grammar or even the spelling. If there are words such as "color", you can be an arrogant prick about british spelling.

4. Follow the groupthink, but make it seem you're not. Wholesome agreeing is boring; mostly-agreeing-with-notes make mods feel we're a vibrant, rational community not afraid of dissent, but still convergent on the Main Thing. If it's a story about RPM hell, point out that RPM has inspired other package systems even if it has turned into yadda yadda yadda. If this seems too hard, criticize Linux, but point out it's the best OS anyway.

5. Post from Wikipedia. If you find an obscure word in the story text, such as "the", "that" or "this", link to a wikipedia article.

6. Mention "karma" or "mod" in your sig. Subliminal messages do work. You can use a popular karma pun, such as "Karma: coma" or "Karma: police", invent mod categories like in "Mod -3 Drunk", or just paste an overmodded post's history into your sig. This _will_ attract moderator attention, and if you have followed the previous steps, you can't fail.

7. Blame Microsoft. The extent of the conspiracy was unforeseen, my friends, as some people suspect Microsoft was behind David Koresh yadda yadda yadda.

These seven simple steps are sure to get you posting at +2 starting score in less than a week!

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