Yeah yeah, I hate my job. That's not the topic of this rant though. I'm still trying to figure this out, but there are people who hate Slashdot. Hell, they even openly admit it. There are even websites promoting ways to try and "take down the evil" or whatever other bullshit they are spouting about. What I want to know is: Why? Why bother? So they don't like the site, or the mods, or Taco and his group. To quote the once-relevent-personality-turn-RIAA-shill James Hetfield, so fucking what. This is a site for geeks to read topics and post whatever inane drivel they want about this driver or that OS or the big evil beast from Redmond or whatever else they want. And yes, as a geek myself, most of it is inane drivel. Most of my stuff is observation and timing, nothing more.

Personally, I like it though. Most "normal" people think it's uninteresting. Boring. Who wants to talk about computers? I just want my MSN and my Hotmail, and that's all I need to be happy. Sadly, this is what many non-geek types think. But that's alright. They don't come here to tell us that we're all geeks and this site isn't worthy of existing. They don't say that this site is unfairly moderated. They don't even know this site exists. So we geeks are left in peace by the uninterested masses. To talk about this device or that review or why SCO execs should be hung up by their toes and placed under a wasp nest. But then the trolls came.

Why are you here? Why bother to come here and post your fanatical lunacy about Goatse Man or TubGirl, or whatever other digusting things I've accidently clicked on? The GNAA and the Yoda guy are just as bad, but thankfully don't include pictures. But why do it? What's the use? What is it about Slashdot that you hate so much. Is it just because you think you've posted some brilliant piece on why MS is a good company, or how BeOS is better then everything else, only to be modded down into oblivion? Does it hurt your ego that much that someone doesn't think you are brilliant? Why declare a "jihad", or whatever you want to call this bullshit, on a geek moderated site? Why spend so much time annoying the living fuck out of everyone? No one want to know how you insert a Yoda doll up your ass. Really, it's not as interesting as you think.

Now I understand why the site is self-moderated. And why it's best to surf at +1, and wait about 20 minutes after a story is posted. The trolls don't usually survive more then 20 minutes. Some sneak through, but they are the ones using the Anti-Slash tools to boost their karma. But most of them are caught, and I don't have to see the bullshit. I can choose to see the BS if I want. Some of it is interesting, if off-topic. Like the anti-American thing I saw yesterday, listing all the US war failures. Like I said, off-topic but interesting. Hell, even the "I for one welcome our Soviet Russian Beowolf-cluster of All Your Base Are Belong to Linux overloads" posts are interesting. At least compared to most trolls. But the trolls trying to bring down Slashdot are ridiculess. If you don't like the site, just go the fuck away. Leave the geeks who want to be here alone, and go do something worthwhile with your time. You're about as bad as the guy I saw in a hockey forum pretenting to be two people arguing with himself everynight. You add nothing to improve the so-called bad condition of this site. When you want to input something useful, come and input it. If it's not as brilliant as you think it is, go find people who will tell you it's brilliant. Just leave us to post our inane drivel in peace...

This is pretty much another rant about work. God I hate my work.

So I recent went through my anual review. Which means I've been here for three years now. Three years...my god. I remember saying once that I didn't want to look three years into my career and see myself still here. But after the whole job market drought, it's not so bad. It's still a pay check. But for what? According to them, I do a rather good job around here. My review was filled with nothing but the "Meets Expecations" or "Exceeds Expectations" marks. And here I thought all along that I was slacking as much as I could. I guess they aren't watching as closely as I thought, and really are just going on what I tell them I'm working on. Dangerous. Very dangerous. But it works in my favour for now, and I guess I'm not as close to being fired as I thought. The only bad things the boss said was that I need to improve my communication, and that I'm too focused at times. Like that is such a bad thing.

Of course this isn't what the rant is about. This rant is about compensation. Yes, I know. I don't really deserve compensation for my work, since I don't do a whole lot of it. But after working here for three years, you'd think that they would have gotten a clue and given me a promotion by now. Whether I truly deserve it or not, in their eyes I am doing a good job. I'm also the lowest ranking person here, and I wasn't even the last one in. After I was hired, they hired a few people with experience. So of course they need to be paid more, since they bring something with them. Except Twin #2...he's never had training past what Twin #1 showed him, and he makes twice as much as I do. And Twin #1 has never had formal training himself. Sorry to anyone who is a self-taught programmer. But these two are more like salesmen then programmers, so it's not comparing the same thing. But I'm still bitter. ANYWAYS, I just brought my sweet ol' self and a whole load of enthusiasm. Too bad they don't pay you for enthusiasm, even though that quickly faded. But still...in the three years I've been here, I have made about $7000 in raises. I still make less then some friends started at three years ago. The excuse..."Well we just can't afford to give out good raises, what with converting the old system to a new web-based system and all. You're not the only one getting such a small raise." Yeah, that makes me feel better. The difference is that everyone else is at least at the intermidiate level, while I'm still at the base level.

So everyone else still makes at least $7000/year more then I do. And yet, I look around and say to myself, "In the time I've been here, I've done more then that person. And that person. And WAY more then that person." The more I do that, the less I want to work. What's the point? If I've done more then some people, and the boss thinks I'm a good programmer anyways, then why push myself to do a good job? I can just keep pushing the drivel I have been for the last little while, and get paid the same as if I did more work. If one day I got a promotion, or a half decent raise, there might be more incentive. At least then I'd see a direct relation between work and pay. As it is now though, there is none. At least none that I can see. So for now, I will spend my days surfing Slashdot, and my nights surfing job sites.

This is just a rant...

I hate insurance. More specifically, I hate working for an insurance company. I don't know what it is. Maybe I'm just too much of the geeky tech type for these people. Or too much of the will-do-anything-for-fun type. Whatever it is, I do not fit in with these people. They're mostly just uptight "business" people, save for the redeemable few. And even they are a little too uptight at times.

I've gotten to the point where I've been lectured, meetinged, committeed, and motivational-speeched to the point that I just don't care any more. I am literally at that point described in Office Space. I work hard enough to just not get fired. And let me tell you, that isn't very much. On average, I might do about hours work a week. What's the point of doing any more. When I did do more, way back when I just got out of school and I was excited about "entering the work world", I enjoyed it. I worked hard at trying to give people what they wanted. But there is that point when you do all this work and you realize...no one is noticing. Sure, the boss tells me I did a great job. Then a week later, he proceeds to tell me all the reasons why I won't be getting that promotion or that raise. Yeah, that's a real motivator. In three years I've made a total of $6,000 in raises, and I had to fight for one of those raises. I'm still making less now then most of my friends from college started at 3 years ago. What's the point of trying?

Yes, yes. I know. Why don't I just get another job? Well, when you live in Waterloo, Ontario, and you only went to college and not the sanctuary of geekness that is the U of Waterloo, it's hard to get a job in a good tech company. Hell, even the mainstream businesses will take a UW grad over a college student. So job hunting is a little difficult. So I'm stuck for now doing a crappy job at my crappy job.

I sometimes worry that I will be fired eventually. But sometimes it almost seems as if that might be the best thing in the world. Fire me. Go ahead. And as soon as they do, I will let go of all this pent up rage and resentment. I will let everyone know exactly how I feel. Burn bridges you say? I'm going to make the BC forest fires look like Boy Scout test. I'm already on the edge. So go ahead. Give me that nudge. I dare you...