Yesterday's blog was not some of my best work. I was angry and upset at the time. What I said was true, but not the whole truth. But what is the whole truth?
Truth is a nebulous concept. I find myself constantly questioning it. To many, it is the truth that abortion is immoral, but to others it is the truth that denying the right of choice is immoral. Perspective affects truth.
So everyone has their own truth. What then, is my truth? What is love? What is hate? What is the point of living? What is the point of dying?
I think I need to go back and describe yesterday. I basically did only two things: Trimmed the tree and went to a party. Trimming the tree was... Interesting. I like Christmas, but I hate decoration. My family always gets a huge tree. 14 feet is a "Small" tree for us. Decorating it, therefore, is a hassle. If we spread it out over a couple days, it wouldn't be a problem, but the big "tree trimming celebration" bugs me. I can't stand being with my family for too long.
Then I went to my friend, RS's birthday party. He's probably the best of my friends, but he's also a bit of a misfit. I'm not sure why. We played Mario kart for a while, then went to see a movie. G2 was there, and I did flirt, but due to some weird circumstances I didn't manage to sit next to her. Funny story: There were three girls at the party. At the movie, during the trailers, some heartthrob came on the screen for literally two seconds (I didn't even know who it was. All three girls screamed, and I mean SCREAMED at the top of their lungs. The entire theater stared at the group, and all the guys were extremely embarrassed. Next trailer, though: Hitchhikers guide. It starts off with some text, then the earth explodes, and I immediately got it. Stood up, SCREAMED, Did my happy dance, and then my friends next to me pulled me back into my seat.
As I'm wtiting this, it's still early, so I may post two entries today. Probably this during lunch, and then another after school.
It's just after physics, which I have with g1. G1 is smart: Hands down, she's the smartest person I know. She's also very funny, and very deep. I see in her the same seeds of dissent that I have. However, we're both shy beyond belief. And I'm not sure... There is the EB between us. And I know there's some cultural pressure on her. I don't know if I could ever be with her. The funny part of it is one of our private jokes: The theme to "Chobits", entitled "Let me be with you".
But am I just seeing what I want to see? That's the rub. I know that people will see what they want to see. I know I'm not immune. I just wrote a biting essay for my LA class that criticized a poem for doing exactly that.
G2 is a nice person, but I wouldn't give her a second look romantically if I could be with g1. But I'm not sure. I'm not sure at all.