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User Journal

Journal Journal: Valentine's Day

This is directed at the male /.'ers looking for relationships.

What I learned about women
Just got in from my bachelor party. I'm getting married this afternoon. Like any good geek here, I decided to look at slashdot before turning in. I saw the posts about how to date women. I didn't post this there because it was a little too personal, but I still wanted to get this out.

I understand. All too well. You are sick of being lonely. Going to the arcade and seeing all the banners advertising V-day. Seeing the pop-up ads for stuff to buy your non-exsistent girlfriend. Mom calling up "Well you know your baby sister is getting married." Makes you want to shoot somebody.

Well, chum, if you are reading this, then let me give you some advice.

  • Think about where to search: Women don't hang out in EB. Nor comic book shops. The ones that do are taken nine times out of ten.
    This means you might have to go to places where Computers Are Not Present. As terrifying as it sounds, such places do exsist. Take a non-technical class. Karate in a university setting is one idea. Some laundromats have a single's night. Take a book and find a coffee shop. Read lightly and pay attention to those around you. See who else shares your favorite author.
  • But I need a line! "Hi" works. Really. If you follow it up with "So, where''s your boyfriend?" shortly thereafter (say after you exhange names and light conversation), you may be in luck. (This assusming she hasn't already told you she has one.) A remark about how a pretty woman like her not having a boyfriend should garner some points. Say it only if you mean it though!
  • Grow a thicker skin I mean thick. Yeah, you've been dissed in Counter-Strike by the best of them. That's nothing to how low you'll feel if you get rejected. It will happen. The important thing is to keep trying.
  • Don't go full-bore first timeWhen you ask your girl out, perhaps an hour lunch during the week maybe the best icebreaker. If it goes well, set a followup for the weekend. If not, well, you need to go back to work.
  • The women are just as nervous as you are When you are out on a date, both of you are trying to see what each other is about. Just remember to relax and have fun.
  • Finally...Don't forget that there's other crayons in the box. It's 2003, but even now, it still needs to be said. There's beauty in all races. I'm your average white male geek. My finance is a not-so-typical black female geek. I wasn't out on the scene looking for a black woman. However, I was open to dating outside my race. It's worked out well for us. Yes, we have had struggles, but they've been worth it.

So, if this helps one person, then I've done my job. Good night/morning as I'm off to bed.

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