Agreed, the onboard UPS is not new. I have a ~10 year old (I believe the CPU is a K6-233) device meant as a SOHO file/print/webserver from IBM that has a built-in gel-cell battery for UPS power just like this server does. Google is 5+ years too late.

Anyone want my prior art to invalidate the patent?

There's no need to wait for Apple - that technology exists today.
I finish my work/download my video on my Windows 7 desktop PC
I pick up my Harmony remote and walk to the TV
I hit the "Watch TV" button. Everything powers up and switches to the right input
The videos show up on my mediacenter machine hooked to the TV as it and my desktop PC are both in the same homegroup
I can select a DVD from my firewire-connected DVD changer
I can pause/rewind/watch previously recorded HDTV with my ATI Digital Cable Tuners

You could easily do this with one PC and a Media Center extender too. So $200 for an Xbox 360 + $100 for a Logitech Harmony remote. Available today.

Server core still has IE libraries - for instance, WinInet which basically is a standard internet connectivity library is there. Hell, even Hyper-V server (the OS that is free and can only run Hyper-V) will actually get offered some IE updates - because some IE components are still part of the OS. Iexplore.exe isn't there, but other chunks are there because substantial parts of the OS (and even third-party applications) use them.

Most long-distance calling cards do exactly this, and can be had for pennies a minute

If this is truly a "large school," basing your network on a single server is such a bad idea it is almost criminal, and implementations like this are what give Windows (and Linux for that matter) a bad name.

I question why you have separate networks for students and teachers, but that aside, why in the world are you giving your network a single point of failure like this? One of Active Directory's strengths is its ability to use multiple servers to achieve redundancy. Why are you running 2 domains with only one DC, and why would you design a new implementation with a single DC/LDAP server/whatever? What happens when that machine has a catastrophic software/hardware problem?

Also, change for the sake of change is a poor idea. If you have a legitimate reason to say that $FOSS_LDAP_SERVER is a better fit for your environment, that's one thing, but by not even considering that AD *MIGHT* be the best fit for your environment, you are doing your employer and clients a disservice.

Hire a consultant or someone that knows what they are doing - regardless of which platform is picked. From the question, it sounds like you don't.