If you have been in a Fry's the last several years...
The last time I went to Fry's, I swore I would never come back. It was horrible. Minimal amounts of saleable merchandise, super high prices, terrible employees. I used to love Fry's but this was a predicable fate.
Perl just works. It's just dumbed down C without pointers but with native regex and a huge add one library. If someone has trouble with regex in Perl they'll have the same trouble with regex in anything else.
If your problem involves regex in its solution, you now have two problems.
"El Capitan"? "Sierra"? Are they running MacOS on these supercomputers? Hackintosh Supercomputers?
Yes, they need the compute power because they are seeing the spinning beach ball.
Then pull their app out of the store.
That really would trigger an anti-trust lawsu... oh, wait. No it wouldn't.
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from a rigged demo. - Andy Finkel, computer guy