Heh heh. I like the line Slashcode gives me when I'm about to babble in my journal:

Entry (This will go down on your permanent record)

My permanent record? I'd better think twice about an entry THIS lame...

Ummm. Nope. Here goes anyway.

I was watching tv today, and I saw a commercial where some family was trying to dig through the earth to visit China. I know, I know, that's not special, we've ALL tried it when we were seven, but it got me to thinking:

Notwithstanding the molten core of Planet Earth, if I was able to dig a perfectly straight tunnel through the planet which came out the other side (which wouldn't be China, I don't think), what would happen if I jumped in? I think that gravity would pull me down at an increasing speed until I hit the actual centre, and then gravity would start slowing me down, because I'd be heading *away* from the centre of the planet. I might shoot out the other side a bit, but by how much? And if so, would I just reverse and keep falling one direction, then the other, until I started throwing up? And then my vomit would start flying back and forth at superspeed like deadly... well, vomit. Or would I keep on zooming into outer space like a Space Shuttle with the good quality O-Rings? Is this a revolution in Space Travel? "The Gravity Engine?" Can you patent digging? Or should I GPL it? Maybe that Warren Ellis guy can put me in a comic book. I'm HoleMan.

Anyway, that's a bit of what I think. The missus, however, thinks I'm an idiot. I don't even want to ask who you guys think is right. Hey, what else was I supposed to think about? American Idol didn't exactly tax my brainpower.

Any theories? Somebody help me, I can't sleep at night thinking about this. It's tearing me apart.

I installed Debian on my dual P400 the other day. It's SWEET. Debian rules. I had no problems with the install, and even if I did, there are idiot-proof general settings that take maybe 10 minutes to burn through without even thinking.

I've been running RedHat since version 3 or something thereabouts. My friend Keni-san and me went together on a copy. It was completely unusable, but we foolishly smoked our Windows' partitions anyway and gave it a shot. RedHat5.2 was much better, and that's the one where I struggled through the install and setting up hardware, but when I finally saw Enlightenment, my brain cooked, and since then, I've always had a version of Gnu.Linux onhand. At first I partitioned my HD, and ran a dual boot setup, then I bought a second hard drive and a HD Tray for swapping them out, so I didn't pollute my Linux with Windows.

Masq's Rule #753: It's always good to have an entirely legitimate Win98 Hard Drive for when the Feds bust down your door and start shooting up the place.

Debian's so good, and apt-get is sooo bloody sweet, (once I figured out how to get stuff from the unstable branch), I don't wanna switch back. I'm not gonna. You can't make me. Debian is like Brain Candy. I'm already turning into a moron, trying to apt-get anything and everything, just because I can. Do I really NEED the German Language Pack? Hell yeah, it's just an apt-get away. Power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. I feel like Dubya with all them shiney buttons, hyuk hyuk.

I guess you know by now, I really like my Woody. Heh heh.

I highly recommend Debian. No bloat besides what you put on there yourself. The stable branch is a little bit ancient (which bugged me with Mozilla, but besides that is okay). Some of it's so old, there's code written in Hebrew by a hacker named Moses (He parsed the red C). Ha ha. That was so bad, I should kill myself. Duhh... But he does look a lot like RMS, I should respect him or I could get Gnu-slapped by the bearded wonder.

I like the auto apting security updates. Cron them, so you're always up2date.

Next week, I'll be installing Deb at work as an LDAP server. The guys want to share their Mozilla addressbooks with each other. Yay. Debian is perfect for PHB requests like this one. AFAIK, Debian saves me time, energy, and money. More time, energy and money means Lil' Seniore Masquito has more freedom to sleep, drink coffee, and gamble on Survivor. That's why Debian rules. It lets me gamble more. Thank you free software! And they called it "UnAmerican". Bah. What's more American than gambling on Survivor?

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Well... maybe gambling on the WWF.

Looking at my user page, it seems the guys at Slashdot were foolish enough to give me blog space just for signing up. Why would anybody read this? Nobody reads my posts, nobody reads my emails, nobody's gonna read my journal. I'm the Invisible Frickin' Man, which is not as cool of a superpower as I imagined it to be when I was in highschool. But then again, the girls don't look as cool as they did in highschool either, which may have something to do with it.

Thankfully, the "security by obscurity" of my Slashdot blog will enable me to use this space to write super-secret messages to my SuperEvilFriends Saddam and Osama without fear of them ever being read by anybody on planet earth.

SuperSecretEvilMessage #1:
Saddam: Got those WMDs you fedexed me. I put them in the shed out back. I can't leave them there forever, since the missus is on a spring cleaning kick and is throwing all my crap out. When you dig yourself out from under that building, you better come get them, or we're BOTH dead meat. I mean it this time. Thanks. See you on wing night.

btw, thanks to this post, I have now hit my Karma cap of Negative five million. Goatse's pretty pissed that I bumped him to #2 troll. Get used to it loser, there's a new king in town.