Fending for oneself... is something my generation (babyboomers) had to do simply because our parents did not have the financial means to provide us with free board and lodging. Our parents' concern was what we, their children, would do to earn a life (work, cook, wash clothes etc. rather than earn a degree.) For entertainment, babyboomers had to be creative (making our own toys), and spending most of our time outdoors (TV, especially daytime TV, was boring.) We didn't have the luxury of classifying our food to likes and dislikes... we had them, but we still had to eat what was put in front of us on the dining table or go to bed hungry.
Those of us babyboomers who succeeded in life (I think it's safe to assume most of us did succeed in life) then shielded our own children from the social pressures that we had to go through to earn a life (work, cook, wash clothes). So instead of teaching our children about the absolute need to earn a life, we shifted the attention to earn a degree. We gave them almost anything they want... food and drinks they like, cool electronic gadgets, and the like. We literally spoiled our children with the minimum of hands-on training in life. How many of us are guilty of not teaching our children to do home chores -- cleaning the toilet, washing dishes and clothes, washing windows... you name it? In the meantime, the means of entertainment changed drastically. 24-hour, full color TV programs for all kinds of interest, game consols, Internet (virtual realities, virtual friends, and even virtual jobs) were "free" for the asking. The youth could stay at home and enjoy anything for free, including free board and lodging. The problem is that all of them are enjoyed indoors.
We have taught our own children to consider work at Starbucks, bookstores, Walmart, McDonald's lowly jobs not worth doing by giving up the freebees at home. The babyboomer generation considered any kind of work as respectful, and certainly better than remaining a leech at home; but this is no longer the case with the young we have raised.
Small wonder that after graduation (high school or even university), the young think they have secured their target in life (or what we, their parents, have taught them to aim for), and never leave home where all the good things in life are free. The young can be very agressive at communcation only if it is virtual (email, texting, on-line chat), but are uterly shy and ineffective at human face-to-face communcation. Many can't look at a person eye-to-eye. They have become weak at unspoken language; they can't read body language and often take spoken language quite literally... as one normally would do with written, brief notes on social network services. They are unable to take both the good and bad of real world social life. They want only the good... something that is possible only by living virtual lives and staying at home.
Certainly, not all of the young are like what I describe them to be above. But the Hikikomori's are. We can point the fault at ourselves for creating the Hikikomori's.