If anyone wondered how VIPs, rich saudis and celebrities would skip TSA scanners, this is it. The $100 bit is just icing on the indignity cake.
On somewhat related news, the TSA has, after years of hard labor in the name of scientific advancement, succesfully performed an amazing feat of entanglement between the moral misery commonly found in South American countries and the dehumanizing indignity more commonly experienced by North Korea residents. The physical distance between the two local minima of human dignity is on the order of 14,000 Km, thus proving without a trace of doubt that advances in fundamental science are the sure way to the bright future that awaits those who understand how to pull human beings down to the level of animals, thus proving that the direction in which societies have been moving in the last, oh, twenty centuries, was WRONG. As proof of our sentiment, we reproduce (with permission) two paragraphs from TFA that surely convey our proud sentiment of the scientific feat:
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TSA says Precheck members are selected randomly for regular screening to enhance security. But that unpredictability irks frequent travelers. The agency doesn't make travelers go to the end of the regular screening line, however, but instead slips them into the front of the regular queue.
"I like Precheck, but it would be much more valuable to me if I were able to know before leaving for the airport whether or not I had Precheck approval for that day's flights," said Beth Allen, a University of Minnesota economist and frequent traveler.
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With the genuine, sincere and warm feeling that accompanies a job well done, we now leave the delightful news behind us, fully expecting the new developments in the field that shall bring americans rewarding and enriching experiences at the airport, while at the same time showing the path forward to other good-willed nations of the first world where the values of freedom reigns supreme. Good night, all good men of the Earth.