In our house we have two parents, two kids (ages 15 and 12) and 7 internet-capable devices (3 computers (2 Macs and 1 PC), 2 smart phones, a Wii and a DS, all served by a wireless network) so we have the following rules:
- The parents are responsible for the computers and phones as well as internet access for all devices.
- Computer-wise the kids only have access to the Macs, and only when the parents do not need them. (The PC is a work-only laptop.)
- The following Parental Controls are activated for the Macs: Time available, total time per day. Kids can't log in as admin, so if they need to install or update something they talk to us about it.
- The iMac G5 has Virtual PC running XP SP3 on it for access to certain homework-related stuff, but Windows runs so slowly on it that there is no temptation to spend any more time with it than strictly necessary. It maybe gets used once a month.
- Network access is unencumbered, but everything is logged.
- Most importantly, the desktop mac is in my office (next to the master bedroom, on a different floor from the kids' rooms) and the laptop and game consoles are only used in areas with direct parental access.
The kids know that we trust them, but they also know that we can check on what they are doing as well as what they have done at any time. They also can have their computer and/or internet access limited as necessary for disciplinary reasons. We spend time with them, we have them show us what they are interested in on the net, where they chat, what they are looking up and so on. If we see something that we don't like, we talk to them about it.
Works well so far.