This guy drinks so much, even his plants are potted!

Jack Daniels is Tennessee whiskey, not bourbon, and any drunk from Kentucky will fight you over that. Old No. 7 isn't exactly premium anyway, try Gentleman Jack or something next time. Jim Beam is probably the most common bourbon, but you'll want something more like Maker's Mark if you're going premium.

I'm sure the other guy probably misses it to. Seriously, how many women do you think go online to flick the bean while talking to strangers?

Well duh, where do they think our space plane was built?

Thats no moon... it's a battle station.

Just get them drunk, then report them for public intoxication.

Meh, a matter of opinion. Looks like finger painting to me. THERE. I SAID IT.

I doubt that the stripper will like where you are sticking your phone, though. I mean, dollar bills are intrusive enough...

..roared into space to deliver into orbit what one reconnaissance official has touted as 'the largest satellite in the world.' ?

At this point, wouldn't it cease to be the largest satellite in the world?

Not long at all...

system("tail -n 100 /var/log/apache2/access_log | cut -f1 -d' ' | sort | uniq");

This may sound like a winner now, but just wait until they start outsourcing your surgeries to sweat shops in China.

Will there be any chicks there?

Irony requires some sort of lesson learned, as the character makes a decision or some deliberate action which inadvertently brings about their own downfall. If there is no self-induced lesson involved, it isn't irony, it's just unfortunate.

In this situation, for example, it would be sort of ironic if they got addicted to blogging about getting over their addiction to Facebook. Think about the classic example of irony, Oedipus. It wouldn't have been ironic (or nearly as good a story) if he didn't know his fate and actively seek to avoid it.

I think you lost about 90% of us right there...

For every Firefox, OpenOffice, or GIMP there are 1000 Wild Tangents or FREE Animated Pony screen savers. So, yes I would call that generally sucking. I feel comfortable in the fact that my doctor makes far more money than my mechanic. I've never taken my girlfriend out to a romantic dinner at the local soup kitchen. That's my logic, where is yours?