It must really annoy Lucas to hear people ask this even after he produced a detailed three-part instructional video on the subject.

Monster actually used to manufacture Beats.

Comma Chameleeeeon

finally some common sense! what my wife confides in her girlfriends during their weekly book club sessions is none of my beeswax. If they're meeting at our house that week, I make a point of scheduling some time at the driving range and let them have their fun. likewise, she has sense enough not to ask what exactly I'm doing hanging out at the local highway rest stop between the hours of 2 and 4 am every Saturday night.

the other side of the story: "my husband thinks he has access to all my email."

is that like the startup version of quasi modo?

They probably just couldn't be bothered.

Actually, confronting the perp is the best way to get the full CSI treatment. If you're lucky, they might even pull up your dental records to conclusively ID your remains.

In all my years as a celebrated sex therapist, I've never heard that particular bit of female anatomy referred to as a 'wiggle room' before.

Land sakes, man, sex should never be boring! Leave the light on long enough to find the hole that's already there!

You're a better man than I. After eight screwdrivers I ran out orange juice and threw my cube at the wall, shattering my lava lamp and setting fire to my shag carpeting. I managed to stomp it out, but my elevator shoes and bell bottoms were ruined in the process. The very next day I slicked back my hair, bought a pin-striped suit, and started buying up distressed companies and selling off their assets to fuel my coke addiction.

happily (adv): to mutter swears under one's breath whilst impotently shaking his fist at the the heavens and kicking the family dog

a museum buried in a landfill.

Why did they choose "Google+"? It has all the positive connotations of "HIV+" and the service is not even remotely viral.

Cut out the middleman! Pay me $1499 and I'll punch you in the face direct from the source.