"The level of connectivity to things is what makes the difference."
I made that distinction already in the different deployments of IP cameras. They are perfectly capable of this and have been used in this way utilizing automation protocols.
"IoT is defined as internet connected things talking to eachother, without needing a human or central server to poll them"
Many automation protocols are peer-to-peer and do not require polling. Some IP cameras can be deployed along side other protocol compliant devices in this matter. Again, as I said before, IoT is just a broad term for a specific type of deployment of devices that have been around long before IoT.
"IoT is "new" because it is neither a client, nor a server"
If that's what you are saying makes IoT new, then it is not new. There are already non-client/server home automation devices that integrate in a peer-to-peer fashion using home automation protocols.
At one point you say it's distinct concept because it's being applied outside of the home. Then here you make the statement that it is new and distinct simply because of the lack of a client-server architecture.
"You are confusing the definition of the word with the use of the word."
No I'm not. I clearly demonstrated my awareness that the strict definition of the phrase versus the general usage of the word are different. We simply differ in our opinions of whether this discrepancy is bad or not. You sir, are confused on the distinction between having an understanding of something, and simply differing in the opinion of whether that distinction is potentially bad. I understand the difference, I just think the huge gap between how it is used and what it truly means will result in it being a mushy buzzword that will be misused. Even among academia, I'm sure if you asked for a strict definition of IoT, you will get vastly different answer tailored to whatever pet project that professor is working on.
The bottom line:
When there is a gap between strict technical definition, and general usage, within this gap are included things which do or do not fall within the technical definition. Thus you have parasites that are being unwittingly promoted, but which have none of the actual benefits that true IoT would have.
It will be no less cringe worthy than hearing some non-techy rambling about cloud computing, all the while lumping in things that are in no way part of that paradigm and thus carry none of the benefits.
"The IoT was first coined when someone talked about applying the home automation model to everything. Why not do that on a factory floor? In a car? For an entire city?"
Never once did I argue against the actual implementation of any of these things, not to mention that it's already been going on for awhile in some factories in the absence of talking heads rambling on about IoT. To take your approach, you are confused about the distinction between arguing the legitimacy of terminology, versus arguing the actual implementation of a pre-existing concept by a new name.
Some of your other points would merit a response, but the above is just a sample of how this discussion is bound to just go in circles. You are ignoring points I made, saying I'm confused about things I already demonstrated a distinct understanding of, and trying to introduce entirely unrelated arguments. Any more of this just looks like two people talking at each other with their hands over their ears.