Comment Hobbit 2: Electric Boogaloo (Score 4, Funny) 298
... like Jar Jar Binksarrim of the water people. And Elrond will have an affair with Galadriel. That's right, as soon as we fully Americanize this story, we will have a real winner here, folks.
Sorry, that was only the first draft. Now, Bilbo is a time-traveling immortal who joins with a hip new Gandalf to save Middle-Earth's ozone layer.
Then, they break dance!