Millions play and it is easier to attack the messenger because it is anti male biased but I am telling you it is not. I have a friend who is a woman who plays to escape as well and I told her that her life is going to suck more unless she stops playing. We do not talk as much as a result :-)
As you write it above, your statement is wholly unfounded. If you made a blanket statement like that and she stays away from you, more power to her. I suspect you left a lot out, or I hope so anyway.
I play DDO a lot, 90% of it with a good friend. She and I have both benefitted from it, its hardly making our life suck. We are both working professionals with careers that require a high degree of training and dedication. We play #1 out of friendship, and #2 to dump some stress from life. Our life will not suck less if we stop playing, so if your above statement is true, then it must be highly situational. It certainly is not true in general.
We both work hard and the game keeps us connected and let's us blow off some steam together. I have some friends which due to circumstance, I've not been able to see in person for many years now. Without things like online gaming, we'd have precious few moments of interaction, and I find my life made better by this.
Of course, I also drink alcohol, and don't have the problems of alcoholism. Personal responsibility is the bigger issue, no matter how much we try to come up with convenient excuses and other things to blame our mistakes on otherwise.