Comment personal ancecdote (Score 1) 527
By all means preserve what you can, but I'd like to relate a personal anecdote.
I'm an old guy, born a little after WW2. My father was a child of the depression. During WW2 he was trained to be a photographer's mate in the navy. Afterwards he worked in civil service, but moonlighted as a photographer, usually a wedding photographer, during my childhood years. He was very good at it. (Maybe that excellence of training is how we won the war.) Later he taught me both photography and darkroom techniques.
Just once I accompanied him on a wedding shoot, when he had injured his hand and needed someone to help carry equipment, and I learned something about the paradox of wedding photography. In a formal wedding, the photographer is the second most important individual perhaps after the clergy, but has a lot more effect of the proceedings. The wedding photographer must create and preserve a permanent stylized record of the _perfect_ wedding, while not getting in the way in the process of the _perfect_ wedding. That means staging and composing the _perfect_ record of the wedding party, and the various stylized posed events of the ceremony, while not leaving anyone with the perception that the entire event is being staged entirely for the purpose of its photographic record. This is difficult to achieve.
I still don't know how he accomplished this with a young, tense wedding party, but accomplish it he did. My father was not well educated (I, on the other hand, have been a college professor) but he sure knew a lot. I can only explain to myself in that I did not live through the depression, so I cannot understand.
But anyway, I can offer this advice. Since your children are old enough to remember what will happen during your wifes remaining lifetime, let them remember that as naturally as they can. By all means digitally record what your can, but don't let the process of that recording distort the experience they can have with their mother during her remaining time. Achieving this is a skill you don't have opportunity to learn, so when you are unsure, let life happen instead of recording it. They will remember!
Best wishes for all of you.