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User Journal

Journal Journal: 2016, the WOAT?

Was 2016 the Worst Of All Time?

Eh, that's debatable. I like to think of it as a finale, in a trilogy. 2013 was the preview.

2013 was mired in 6 weddings I had to either be in or attend. I hate weddings like I hate country music, or having a doctor touch your balls during a physical. So that year was awful. Work wasn't particularly great, though I did get an award out of it.

2014 was a horrid year. The Lady was working a job she hated, being treated like a slave. So she transfered that energy onto me. We had the dog. That was terrible. Then the attempt at other animals. She got into CRNA school, but was diagnosed with Meniere's disease shortly thereafter, causing massive disruption for the rest of both of our lives. The sex started dying out in 2014 too.

2015 was a lot of dealing with Meniere's and the drama of school. Combining the two was a nightmare as well. More stupid animal bullshit. But she did find yoga and meditation and became a better person. Still, not much sex. And she was also diagnosed with Celiac's. This was the year I started school too, so while I gained a sense of purpose, I forfeited probably a couple years off my life too. So it goes.

2016. That brings us to this year. While we've kind of been coasting, there have been bouts of wanting to quit school. Feeling like she can't and shouldn't be a CRNA. Lot's of sick days. Presidential election all year. Football team doing good enough to get my hopes up, but no good enough to make me proud. Trump winning the election. And one of the most stressful semesters + work projects in recent memory. So that's how 2016 went.

And just recently, I decided to try and upgrade Ubuntu from 14.04 to 16.04. Well, that crashed and burned. So I was left with the option to install a new OS or throw my computer away and never look at the internet again. While the latter was tempting, I decided to try installing Arch Linux. That took longer than I wanted and I was having some trouble. I would like to try again, when I have some time. Possibly after graduation. But I gave up and went back to my long-time favorite, Debian.

I had it up and running in no time, with a few minor tweaks. For one, I didn't get the wireless card's firmware installed so my CPU was going crazy looking for it until I got it installed after the fact. Now everything's happy. Except my screen resolution on XFCE kinda looks like ass and makes my eyes hurt. I don't know what to change it to though.

So anyway, that's my year.

But everyone posting the "Me at the beginning of 2016 vs. me at the end" memes... what's their point? Like 2017 is going to be any better? If anything, I can see 2017 being way worse. I'm really not expecting much. My money is on 2018. Because that's when I graduate and become a data scientist and also will be going on another metal cruise. So that year can't be all bad.

Anyway, that's all I got. Passed Bayesian Statistics and Intro to Data Sci. About ready to start Time Series Analysis and Data Viz. Also about ready to release my mobile app. Pretty stoked for that (once I get it working ffffffuuuuuuu------!!!!!!).

Ok, I'm going to continue setting up this new OS. grumble grumble grumble.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Greetings, Comrade

Now that Donald Trump is our Supreme Leader, I guess I should start learning Russian.

Right now, all I know is Na Zdorovje. It's a start. On the bright side, I've always wanted to write a depressing 800 page novel. I'll find a silver lining to this election yet.

All kidding aside, that intro was just to bate the trolls into trying to bate me. Since my last journal was such a success with the anonotrolls, I figure just mentioning the DJT name will stir up a few. And notably, they don't actually read your post. They just comment, like turds. Probably because they're being paid by Russia. Anyway.

I'm currently running an MCMC for some real-world data. So that's kind of exciting, but I'm doing it on a p6-2330 dual core with 6GB RAM. It's crawling. I'm lucky I'm able to also use a browser. For this project, I've had to choose - do I want Chrome, or RStudio with my data loaded? Take your pick. Lately, I feel like I'm falling into despair. Not because of Trump (though that doesn't help), but because of this fucking hat trick I'm trying to pull off. Passing two classes (with style!) and my work project is teetering on the edge of failure for all three.

Not to mention, I feel like I'm not even myself anymore. I just stumble through the day, ticking off things that need to be done. Doing nothing I want to do, or need to do for myself, beyond drinking and eating and putting on weight.

Afer this shit is over, I'm defininitely getting back in shape. I'll do another Spartan Race. I hate being fat. Ok, I'll stop complaining. Time for the trolls to do their job. Annnnd, go. Aft
User Journal

Journal Journal: Fuck 12

Donald Trump is President-elect of the United States. There, that explains the title.

I've been sucked into politics for the last year, mostly by design of the media machine that started this fucking godawful election back in 2015. They built this monster, but the Dems turned him lose. I really sincerely thought that Clinton was headed toward an easy victory and that Trump would tear the GOP apart. But instead, now the Dems are being torn apart and the GOP owns both houses of congress, the presidency, and at least one supreme court seat. So yeah. Fuck.

I'm going to lay down my predictions (based not off of data but purely gut, so take it for what its worth) and we'll see how I do in a few years:

1. Trump doesn't finish his presidency. Either by way of stepping down or impeachment, he doesn't make it 4 years.
2. He doesn't build a wall, doesn't scrap Obamacare, doesn't appoint a special prosecutor to jail Hillary, doesn't ban all Muslims and doesn't deport all current illegal immigrants. Also doesn't rebuild a bunch of factories and coal mines either. Mostly because none of that is really feasible.
3. He will get much tougher on immigration and make life harder for people who have moved her or want to move here.
4. He will make some economic and trade decisions that won't be felt until after his (hopefully less than 4-year) presidency.
5. He will ease regulations on the energy industry that will cause irreparable damage to our planet. But he won't be around to see the effects, as Florida, Louisiana, California, and New York are slowly submerged underwater.
6. Already happening: Racism, xenophobia, and bigotry have been given the thumbs up by putting the supreme leader of all of that into the highest office in the land.

The rest is a mystery and I don't think even the GOP knows what he's going to do. It'll be a watch and wait game, and it's a shitty game.

In tech news, I'm slogging through my project. I don't know if I'll get it done in time. I fucking hope so. I need a win. I haven't had a win in a long time.

Bayesian Statistics is a tough class, but I'm learning a ton. I feel like I still haven't quite wrapped my head around some of the foundational principles yet. I'm going to come back to this when I get more time though.

Really, that's about all I want to talk about. It's late and I need to get to bed so I can continue work on the mobile app. So much left to do.

Hope I'm not reading this from a camp in a few years!

User Journal

Journal Journal: Hey there, Fuckface in 2020

Yes, you. I hope you're sittin' pretty high on the metaphorical (or physical, what do I care) hog. I'll keep this short, but I've noticed that in my 10+ years of Slashdot-journalling, there's one thing I can count on: I never expect this entry to last quite so long, nor do I expect myself to live quite so long. So, let's see who outlives who.


Anyway, if you can read this, 2020 karniv0re, you're in one of 3 states:

1. Super rich and totally banging models because your gf was like "Whatevs" and you have money and it's the future and WHATEVER DUDE
2. Pretty similar to now - still in school because you decided to do a PhD because you hadn't had enough of the pain, and because you think it's your one road to, er, being something.
3. In a prison somewhere. What have you done. Also, how are you reading this. Do you have internet?! WTF?! Our prison system is a joke.

I suppose there's all the other inconsequential scenarios in there too, but who has time or cares about that. Seriously, pick one or get out of the way. Preferably 1 or 2. Try to avoid 3.


P.S. 2030 karniv0re. Dude. How gross are your balls right now? As a vestige of the past, I am holding my balls whilst typing this right now. Hopefully that lets some youth time travel.

Anyway, I'm sure you're super smart and better than me at a lot of things. I just hope I'm doing my best to get you to where you are. Time is a cruel mistress and she don't give no fucks. Let's do our best in spite of her.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Miscellany Across the Spectrum

I don't have anything terribly specific to write about, but lots of little things.

Looking back nearly two years ago provides a pretty good picture of where I'm at. This tidbit from November of 2014 provides some insight:

After re-reading my last journal entry, man. This year has sucked. Shit was bleak.

That was from a journal entry titled Things Are Looking Up. But things never went up. I never got that architect position, and no more than a week later, the lady fell sick with Meniere's, which has been the centerpiece of our lives ever since.

Since then, it's been a war of attrition to see whether we can outlast our problems or if our problems outlast us.

I did end up going back to school, and I'm still in school. It's been a mixed bag of good and bad. I'm glad I'm learning things, and I'm glad I'm progressing toward a degree. I hate how much stress it causes me and how much time it eats up. I'm getting super out of shape because I don't have time to workout. I haven't been to the gym in probably about a year. I still run when I can, but it's not enough to counteract the booze and comfort food. I have cut back a bit on drinking. I don't keep bourbon around anymore. My regular mix of a couple beers and a couple manhattans from 2015 was slowly killing me. So I'm down to around 2-4 beers a night. Not great, but better.
I actually don't like being drunk anymore. I associate it with bad times now. So now, I prefer to be sober but still drink beers. It's a balance I guess. I expect that as I get older, and stress goes down (hopefully!), I'll drink even less.

But 2014 - 2018 (possibly even into 2019) maybe the most stressful years of my life. I feel like I can't relax until the Lady is done with school, boards passed, job acquired, and has been working for at least a year. In a way, I'm kind of glad 2016 is nearly over. I put this year on the calendar as a year to "get through." There were no incentives this year to speak of. None to look forward to.

I moved back over the the Glass Palace, giving up my awesome old cube and nice place in the company for a more anonymous role. Although it wasn't a great role there either. But at least I could focus on school. Now I've got a project due AND two classes. It's killing me. If I make it through this semester, I'm not sure what other challenges you could throw at me that would be tougher. I mean, I shouldn't say that. I thought I was being challenged a year ago with my Probability Models class. But Bayesian Stats + Data Science + work project + girlfriend with health issues is pretty much maxing me out.

Do I even need to mention how terrible the election has been? But I can't look away. It's such a fucking trainwreck. It also makes me question if I'm really a good person. I've done plenty I'm not proud of. Who really is good anyway? We're all sacks of waste waiting to die and fertilize the soil.

Maybe I'll list some good news. I did talk with my old boss and he's interested in bringing me on his team. He runs the Data Science team here. So that would be some great experience for me, and a definite change of pace. I'm going to talk with our AVP here pretty soon about that and my final school project. I want to work on ETAs. I think that'll be a great project. And next semester I'm taking a Time Series Analysis class, which will help in that analysis.

It looks like I will be out of debt by (revision number 920442) bonus time in 2018. So a little over a year to go. We'll see what pops up along the way. Kind of annoying that I'll be 35 just getting out of debt. Ridiculous, actually. But this is where we're at.

I have been toying with the idea of getting a PhD but I really don't know. Seems like an awful lot of effort for those letters. But I know it'd be huge for me. I'll probably continue to ponder it through 2017. Leaving it on the table.

But for now, I have a mobile app to build. I have roughly two weeks to put the finishing touches on the code. Time to earn my bonus.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Growing in Data Science

I'm taking two classes this semester. Stepping it up from the single-class semesters. I think it'll be ok though. I'm in Intro to Data Science and Bayesian Statistics. Man, a year ago, I was so excited to be in a DS class. And now, here I am, and it feels like bush league. It's because I've been studying this stuff so intensely for the last year, doing things the right way, no shortcuts, doing my own research, listening to DS podcasts, etc. I'm not terribly surprised when our professor is talking about reproducible research using Knitr. Got it, dude. I've been rolling with RMarkdown for at least a semester, and LaTeX even longer.

And despite how it sounds, I'm trying NOT to be a know-it-all. But it's hard. Because I've all the things we're learning in this class are things I've been doing on my own in other classes. So I'm just trying to keep my mouth shut and try to learn a thing or two. And I have! In learning R, I've skipped over a lot of the programming language aspects of it. I read somewhere, R is meant to be learned in tandem with statistics. So that's what I've been doing. And in doing so, I've skipped a lot of the fundamental programming language stuff that I would normally learn when learning any other language. So now's a good time to start picking that stuff up.

But to the title of this post, we've got a semester-long project we have to work on, and on a long run today, I was thinking about project ideas. Then I got to thinking about why it's so hard to come up with good DS projects. Here is my attempt to explain this, which can be used as a catalyst to explain why data science will never be fully automated, at least until we have artificial creativity (still a long way from reality).

1) There are two high level purposes of machine learning - classification and prediction.

So far so good. I think we can all agree on this. We're either trying to put things in buckets or guess what the next value is going to be. Of course it gets a lot more complicated when you dive in, but at the high level, that's it.

2) There are 5 types of predictions we can make (I came up with these off the top of my head while on a run, so don't take this as gospel).
2a) Natural phenomena - weather, stock market, global economies.
2b) Human phenomena - Baseball players hitting home runs, football teams winning the Super Bowl, how much I will weigh next year, will you click this ad, will you buy this product
2c) Social phenomena - Presidential elections, who you might want to follow on Twitter, Data Scientist wages
2d) Games of chance - Poker, Blackjack, dice, flipping coins
2e) Games of strategy - Literally any board game with multiple players

(There are almost certainly others, but this is seriously all I can think of and it makes sense to me)

Furthermore, there are three stages to data science (ONCE AGAIN, MAKING THIS UP AS I GO):

I) Asking questions, designing the problem
II) Modeling the problem, delivering results
III) Making decisions on those results

I am coming to the conclusion that data science doesn't spend enough time on I and III. It focuses so much on II, the technical side, that it forgets to even teach us to ask questions or tell anyone why the model is useful. And maybe in many scenarios, the business teams, managers, VPs and CEOs perform I and/or III. But I am somehow in a position where I need to prove why DS is useful. All the technical knowledge in the world ain't gonna make that happen. I need to be able to apply it. So really, I and III are about advertising ourselves, somewhat. Machine Learning without purpose is just a cool parlor trick. But use it to answer a really a good question and then perform some action to make life better, and you're a superhero.

So anyway, that was my key insights today as I hauled in 8 miles. If I'm way off on this shit, let me know in the comments.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Learning Data Science at t_1

Nearly a year ago today (give or take a few hours), I formally began this path toward Data Science. We'll call that t_0.

Back then, I had the faintest idea of what Data Science was. It seemed to me to be a collection of tools and programming languages. Like, oh, if I know R, or MapReduce/Hadoop/NoSQL, I'm a data scientist. Well, I'm happy to report, in the year that I've been studying Data Science, I know enough to tell you that it is a lot more than that. I am now on my fifth probability and/or statistics class. I've had one Big Data class (that focused on NoSQL and Hadoop) and I can say, it was probably the least of my concerns. Data Science is not just some extension of being a software engineer. Sure, being a Software Engineer will make a lot of things easier, but being a data scientist is an extension of being a statistician who incidentally has some software engineering skills.

I will still say, the biggest help to me throughout grad school thus far has been my professional background. I see all these kids going straight through from undergrad to grad, and they're still just students. There's really no professionalism in them. I've hit straight As or A+s in my first 4 classes, and I ascribe that entirely to having a strong professional background. I approach school like I do my job. I'm not trying to just pass the tests, but rather completely understand the subject.

So today, a year later (let's call this t_1), I am feeling smarter. But not by any means ready. If I were to be hired as a data scientist today, I would probably be in an intro level job. And I wouldn't blame someone for putting me there. I'm basically starting from scratch (with a little software engineering background to help me out). I am hoping I can sneak in some actual real-world work before I graduate to give me a foothold though.

I may have a little consulting work in the healthcare field, thanks to the Lady. I will definitely be able to help her with her Capstone project, but may also be able to help out one of her professors with data he collected on recertification of CRNAs and whether it is effective to do so. I'm kind of itching to do something like that. It's out of my realm of expertise, so it'd be cool to get healthcare data experience. Do I have time? Eh, I think I could make time probably.

My current work project is somewhat coming along. After hitting the point where I decided it all needs rewritten, things started moving faster. We just finished up a demo to our customer, and they approved. I think this is going to go nicely. Time to get the backend services knocked out.

Alright, well anyway. Intro to Data Science and Bayesian Statistics this semester. Two classes. But I think Intro to DS will be a piece of cake. Bayesian, though... We'll see. I want to keep my 4.0. Gonna have to keep pushing.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Big Data, Distribution-Free Stats, and Mobile Apps

Just a quickie before I start my next summer class. I just finished Big Data a few weeks ago. It was really a piece of cake, but also kind of awesome.

Remembering my entry from September 10th, 2015 Dear Gournal. The reason I was so confused is that these are all so new, and classifying them requires a good deal of insight. Well, my Big Data class gave me that, so at least I know what each of them are and what they do. Solid win.

With the mobile app, I at least have a plan. A plan is better than no plan.

And now I need to go to my Distribution-Free Stats class. Should be pretty straightforward, but my teacher seems all over the place. We'll see.

User Journal

Journal Journal: More Cordova Hell

By now, I am desperate.

This fucking app has advanced exactly 0 measurable units in the last 3 weeks. I have tried a lot of things, but I always get stopped a few steps in by more shit breaking. This is insanity.

I'm going to continue documenting my struggle, in the hopes that I figure something out and am able to articulate why this has taken so long.

Since the app I have is completely fucked as-is, I need to start small and add in. I will start with a clean slate. A sample app. My goal, by the end of this, is to have a working app that can take
a picture with my phone's camera. Doesn't have to do much else.

I will start with this sample app:

        git clone

Obeying the, I started in the directory and did

        npm install

        cd www

sh.exe": cd: www: No such file or directory
Great. I'll assume he means www-src and move on.

        cd www-src
        bower install

sh.exe": bower: command not found

        npm install -g bower

        bower install

bower retry Request to failed with ECONNRESET, retrying in 1.6s ...

Googled grunt ECONNRESET:

Googled "where is .gruntrc", because honestly, I don't even know where npm is putting shit. Find out it's in AppData\Roaming\npm\node_modules\bower

Settled on home directory.

Trying to update .gruntrc.
Error: Windows Explorer tells me I can't do that and that I must type a filename.
Find out, I can't do that in Explorer and have to do it on the command line.

        mv bowerrc.txt .bowerrc

Added to .bowerrc:

    "directory": "library",
    "registry": "",

        bower install
        cd ..

        cordova plugin add cordova-plugin-console

Error: Current working directory is not a Cordova-based project.

And at this point, I'm realizing this isn't going to work.

Starting over.

        cordova platform add android --save
        cordova build android --verbose

Copy platform\android\build\outputs\apk\android-debug.apk to phone and try to install.

Error: App not installed

Deleted old app and tried again. App installed.

Now I'm back to a starting point.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Mobile Hell

I've been trying to write a mobile app for about 5 years. What a fucking joke. Nobody even uses apps anymore.

I mean, sure, we use a few. But what was the last app you downloaded that you regularly use? Probably Facebook or Twitter. Probably not Billy Joe's Bait Shack app. You just go to his fucking website.

Anyway, my company wants an app. It kind of makes sense, and I can certainly do some cool things. But I'm inheriting an app that was already half-assed, and now I have to make it work. I am running
into so many problems.

So here's the specs:

It's an Apache Cordova app with some native parts to Android and iOS. The only other technologies are Backbone.js and Require.js. But it's also about 4 years old and age has not treated it well. And
I'm finding that the tutorials for Cordova apps are shit. So I'm going to try to follow one and see how far I get before I lose my shit.

I am here: Please follow along.

I already have Cordova, so I'll update:

        $ npm update -g cordova

That worked.

Ok, now I'll create my sample project:

        $ mkdir workshop
        $ cordova create workshop com.blah.workshop Workshop

        Error: Cannot find module 'config-chain'

Uhh. Ok.

        $ npm install -g config-chain
        $ cordova create workshop com.blah.workshop Workshop

        Error: Cannot find module 'umask'

Ok, I see where this is going.

        $ npm install -g umask
        $ npm install -g npmlog
        $ npm install -g uid-number
        $ npm install -g which
        $ npm install -g npm-registry-client
        $ npm install -g chownr
        $ npm install -g dezalgo
        $ npm install -g npm-cache-filename
        $ npm install -g char-spinner

        Creating a new cordova project.

Finally! Now I can create my Android platform.

        $ cordova platforms add android

        Error: Failed to fetch platform android
        Probably this is either a connection problem, or platform spec is incorrect.
        Check your connection and platform name/version/URL.
        Error: Cannot find module 'path-is-inside'

OMFG. More.

        $ npm install -g path-is-inside
        $ npm install -g fs-vacuum
        $ npm install -g async-some
        $ npm install -g fs-write-stream-atomic
        $ npm install -g fstream-npm
        $ npm install -g sha
        $ npm install -g normalize-git-url
        $ npm install -g realize-package-specifier
        $ cordova platforms add android

Finally that's done. Now we can move on with the tutorial.

        $ cordova plugin add org.apache.cordova.device
        Error: Registry returned 404 for GET on

You have got to be fucking kidding me. Thankfully, Andre had a useful comment:

For point 8, replace:

cordova plugin add org.apache.cordova.device
cordova plugin add org.apache.cordova.console


cordova plugin add cordova-plugin-device
cordova plugin add cordova-plugin-console

That worked.

        $ cordova build android --verbose

Now, I SHOULD be able to run this directly on my plugged in mobile device. I mean, it shows up in chrome://inspect/#devices.

        $ adb devices

No devices show up. It says I probably need the USB drivers, but I supposedly have them. So I guess I'll have to copy the file to my phone manually.

But you know what? That works!!!! Thank the fuck Christ. That gives me a Hello World. Now for the hard part...

User Journal

Journal Journal: Idea For a Bar

I was on the bus on my way to school and I thought of this great idea for a bar. So I'm going to write it down here so someday when I'm rich enough, I can make it happen.

I'd call it The Library, or something similar, and it would be almost a literal library.

The inside would be similar to the New York Public Library, with green lamps on desks. There would be actual books there, but like the old looking ones.

Here's the best part: The basement (cause there has to be a basement) would be the quiet section for people who actually want to study. We'd have coffee, and of course beer, wine, and cocktails. And here's the other kicker - I would have a broad range of prices. Cheap PBR and whiskey for the budget conscious, and higher end cocktails for people who want to feel fancy.

Oh, and there should be a "call" button for the waitresses so they're not always coming down and bothering you. (Why don't we have these already?!)

I would use data science to select the right building, market, handle the finances, etc. I would need a partner on this, someone who can run a bar. I just want to finance it and make my dream a reality. But I guess I need some money first. hrm. I'll come back to this when I have some of that.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Gets Worse

At least it seems like things are getting worse.
My weekend started off with annoyances by our architect on Friday. He was so goddamn worried about how we were going to format our code. He's contacted me on at least 6 different occasions every time it was brought up. He's so worried I'm going to throw some crazy book of rules at him. For fucks sake. I just want it to be formattable and not looking like shit.

And then another fuckhead at the company I'm consulting for made some stupid comment about me being a Millennial when I said I didn't have a car. What the fuck does that even mean? That we're breaking from the Baby Boomer and Gen X trends of destroying our planet and making better decisions about how we consume? Fuck you asshole. Of course he drives a Benz SUV. What a cock.

So that went with me into my weekend. Then I spent the day sharing the apartment as study space with my ever-increasingly disgruntled girlfriend. Her shit is getting tough, so now she's starting to crack. I can't fucking deal with this. Today, I started the day off with her calling me because she got pulled over by a cop because she was driving in the left lane on the interstate, but there were people in the right lane so she couldn't pull over. He flashed his lights at her and she didn't know he just wanted her to get out of the way, so she pulled on to the left shoulder, which is illegal. So he ticketed her for driving in the left lane and asked her where she learned to drive. Thanks asshole, for setting my day off wrong. Fuck the police if they're going to be unprofessional assholes.

Then she failed her patho-phys test and her teacher called out her Meniere's in front of the class. So I've been trying to assuage her feelings of uselessness once again and telling her that quitting is not an option. Fuck me. I don't know how many times I've had to do this. It felt like 2015 was this, and only this, over and over. But for a while, I felt like we were coming out of it. But I guess it's always going to be there, rearing its ugly head. Fuck all this.

I know, there's not much tech stuff here. Sometimes I just need a journal to rant in. I'm trying to figure out a bunch of shitty unit tests that aren't unit tests. They're all integration tests, and not even half of them pass. So I'm also dealing with that. There. Tech.

Alright, I'm out. Just wanted to bitch.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Quick-ish Rant

I feel the need to rant.

I am drunk, and this time it's not for "just because!".

We have a new architect (who is not me) and he has been spraying his scent everywhere to stake his claim. Outright, I can't say it's bad. He's ushering in TDD (which I am iffy about, given our limited time to market), collaboration (because he's remote), and some poorly thrown jabs at me, that I assume were meant to be humorous but as I already mentioned, they fell flat on the floor.

I don't know how to feel. On the one hand (the pro-YAY, NEW ARCHITECT THAT IS NOT GOING TO FUCK THIS UP hand), I'm ok with it. Ya know, it can't be worse than how it's been. We got rid of our worst asshole. So what am I worried about? Well, he's not at all cognizant of our current environment. And a large part of me says "OOOhhhh, so you're basically a big pussy who can't accept change!? OooooOhhhhhHHHHH!!!! FUCK YOU." Thanks, dick-me. Back atcha. But really, dick-me has a point.

It's hurting my sensitive little feewings a bit, and it's disrupting my day-to-day habit. So that's bothering me. It also kind of bothers me that this dude rolls in without giving much fuck to what we've already built. Maybe that's what's driving me the most nuts. C'mon, man. You can't roll into the Taj Mahal and say, "Wow. This needs redone. Let's start here..." which is pretty much how I feel this is going.

But I'm in a pretty precarious spot. I am trying to get through this Master's program, so I need things stable. I can't be rocking boats, and obviously, there aren't many boats on my side of the navy. So I guess I need to bite my lip. It's really not all bad, he has good experience, and honestly, I think in any other situation, I would value it a lot.

I just hate the feeling of a storming general coming in and telling me what to do. Because that feels like the "president" has decided that I am not fit to command and would be better suited to sit on the sidelines and follow orders. That's where my frustrations lie.

And probably will for a while.

Ok, drunk guy going to bed to get bossed around tomorrow by some dude he could probably be. Whatever.

User Journal

Journal Journal: You Can Chat in Hell

Back in late November of 2015, I was tasked with coming up with an instant messenger solution that our partners could use to communicate with our operators. That sounds pretty simple. Everyone uses IM and has for over 20 years. And Slack and HipChat are massively popular.

Here's where they start throwing wrenches into my plan. Any third party server is not allowed. Law does not want our conversations stored on third party servers, and security doesn't either. So that scratched off my obvious answer. We use Sametime as a company, and there is an external option for that, but security also denied that stating that then an external user would have visibility to the entire company and could potentially IM, say, our CEO. Ok, so there goes that too.

You know where I'm going next with this, right? Roll our own XMPP server, of course!

Ahh, XMPP. I have had a fondness for it since Google Talk came out. An open protocol that seems to work pretty well and has a lot of users. Ok, so we have a starting point. Now what.

Well, the next step was to figure out how easy it would be to host a server. We basically have 3 options. There's ejabberd, an Erlang-based server that's been around the longest. I like it, but we don't have a lot of Erlang developers (which is sad, because I also like Erlang. So it goes). There's Prosody, which is kind of a KISS model written in Lua. I liked it too, but it wasn't very Enterprisey. Then there's Openfire. Java-based? Check. Plugin architecture? Check. Mature? Very!

Openfire looked very intriguing when I started looking at it. Of course, being enterprisey, it's a lot heavier than something like Prosody. Which means it has a steeper learning curve. But you take the good with the bad.

So I pitched my idea to Legal. They said we have to archive messages for a certain time period, which I can do with this server. It can archive to Oracle. Perfect. Then I talked with security. My initial solution was to use Strophe.js to connect directly to Openfire. They put the kabosh on that when they saw that users would be unauthenticated in our DMZ. I walked away from that meeting a little perplexed. After educating myself on our architecture a little more, I dug around for a SiteMinder module. There was none. But, there is a webchat interface called Fastpath. It allows you to run helpdesk operations. That's my ticket. Because then they would be operating within our standing operating procedures, just like any other app.

This thing is ugly, and hasn't been given a good enhancement in about 10 years. So now I take that challenge on. More to come on that.

Once I overcame the architectural hurdles, then I had to start working with our infrastructure teams. This required an ungodly amount of requests. Oracle, server planning, application IDs, Linux guys, Apache rules, change management... I think I worked with just about every team in the company to get this done.

I've made a lot of progress though over the last month and I'm ready to go to production next week. I AM STOKED. I've been saving a cigar for just such an occasion. But next comes the hard part. I will need to start developing on this decade-old code. I have a user-request to add group chat, which is not at all what this thing is meant for. But even before that, I need to fix security issues and add SiteMinder integration. I don't think any of this is going to be a walk in the park. On the other hand though, it does sound fun! And I'm giving back to open source, which I love doing.

I'm omitting a lot of the trials and tribulations I went through when setting this all up, but I'll probably just put that in some internal documentation.

I'm just ready for a cigar.

User Journal

Journal Journal: The Streaming Data of My Consciousness

First of all, why is the "Write in Journal" button at the goddamn nether reaches of Slashdot? Are you trying to get me to not write my thoughts here? Too fucking bad. I've been doing it for over a decade, so deal with it.

This post will be largely drunken and angry and in a stream of consciousness style because I am drinking, angry, and don't care. I mean, most of my posts are stream-o-consciousness posts, but I am not always drunk. I'm actually not drunk... yet. I'm working on it. Drinking a LeatherheadRed which is quite delicious, and I took a shot of Evan Williams right when I got home because, well, that's where I'm at.

The Lady asked for more money to buy school books today. I don't think it would bother me as much if she just said, "heyyyy, I might need $500 for books. Can you swing that?" Rather than, "So I might need money for books." Me: "How much." Her: "I just hate how they do this. I hate not contributing. blah blah blah." None of that helps. In fact, it just makes me angrier. Just tell me what you need so I can figure it out. Right now, I'm still living on 401(k) loan money. The stupidest loan I've taken out, but what choice did I have. It is keeping me off of credit cards, but is in effect, decreasing my retirement significantly, and tying me to the company that I would like to have the option to leave.

This goddamn company, man. Stock is dropping. They're predicting another shitty year in 2016. For FUCKS SAKE. THIS IS NOT THE TIME. Everything else seems like it's falling apart. And what bothers me probably most right now is that I'm having trouble on my last homework in Probability Models. We're doing Renewal Theory, and shit got hard. All out of nowhere, everything was like, "Hey! We heard you've been doing well! We're here to fuck that up for you!" I have to turn it in tomorrow. I could turn it in and take a hit on it, which would keep me at a low A, high B, but for one thing, I want the A. And another, at least one of the problems on this homework is on our final, which is worth a shitton, so I HAVE to understand it regardless. So that, on top of realizing I spent over $600 on chameleons that we had to take to the Humane Society because the cats kept fucking with them.

Just came back from a break. I checked Facebook. That was a mistake. Read some bullshit about Nassim Taleb hating on GMOs. Goddamnit, nobody is good. Everyone has a part of them I will hate. Maybe that's just life. I'm sure there's things you'd hate about me (least of all my writing). I guess that just gives me more of a stance to take while reading Antifragile. The book overall is quite good and inspiring, but some of it must be taken with a grain of salt, or from a certain context. Like when he says that nothing good comes from universities, but rather from tinkering and hobbyists. Well, that's true for the big things (think the automobile, Microsoft, Facebook, etc), it's not true in general. But that's not what Taleb deals in. He deals in Black Swans - unforeseen groundbreaking events - good and bad, in which case, scientists being wrong about GMOs (lots and lots of scientists... lots) would be a Black Swan. Still, he puts the burden of proof on the scientists to prove that he is wrong. And that is not good skepticism or science. If you're bringing the skepticism, you better have science on your side. Unfortunately for Taleb, it is not. Can't get behind him on that one. Also, he resorts to name calling. That's pretty sad for a well-respected best selling author and academic. :/

Well anyway. My sister is badgering me to do her statistics homework. I partially want to to see if I can do it without remembering much from Prob & Stats I, but I also know I have a lot of shit to do and she's not learning anything if I do it for her. So I told her I'd give her an hour for questions. I have my own final to do! I'm genuinely stressed about this now. I want to do well. I want an A. For the first time in my academic career, an A matters to me. Demonstrable understanding of a topic matters to me. I want to be able to say, Yes, I took Probability Models. I can show you how to do Renewal Theory.

Alright, I'm gonna watch some 'flix and hit the sack. Peace. Hope you enjoyed the stream.

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