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User Journal

Journal Journal: Merry Christmas Everyone!

Not much to say right now.
Just want to whore myself for a slashdot subscription.

If you buy me a gift subscription, I'll foe you.
Doesn't that sound fair?

Someday, I hope to be the slashdot user with the most foes, freaks and fans.

Thank you, and good night.

User Journal

Journal Journal: The Final Foe 2

Well, I've reached 199 foes, well, I have 9 friends right now but whatever.
I'll probably change them to foes or unfriend them at some point. I just cut my friends list a little to make room for more foes, but as far as I can tell, I only have 1 more relationship to give away without subscribing to /.

So I ask the question, Who wants to be my last foe?

The first person to post gets it.

If you don't understand why I foed you, read my last JE.

Anyone who wants to buy me a subscription can get foed too.

And I'd just like to take this time to thank all of you for your support.

One interesting thing is that I've been given the options to restrict posting like subscribers do, but I'm pretty sure I'm not a subscriber.

But I want anyone to be able to post here so I'm not going to use it.
Besides all my friends are foes so that wouldn't make much sense.

User Journal

Journal Journal: My Enemies List

If you haven't figured it out yet, the reason I have so many foes is a play on the Enemies List. So I foed you because I like you. I guess it is also to make fun of the whole slashdot foes concept. I guess that doesn't explain why I have any friends but whatever.

Any Questions?

I'd love to hear any input from my fans.

United States

Journal Journal: Shut Up! Be Happy! 5

We interrupt this program with a special bulletin.

        America is now under martial law.

        All constitutional rights have been suspended. Stay in your homes. Do not attempt to contact loved ones, insurance agents, or attorneys. Shut up. Do not attempt to think, or depression may occur. Stay in your homes. Curfew is at 7pm sharp, after work. Anyone caught outside the gates of their subdivision sectors after curfew will be shot. Remain calm. Do not panic. Your neighborhood watch officer will be by to collect urine samples in the morning. Anyone caught interfering with the collection of urine samples will be shot. Houses will be inspected for trace elements at noon. Anyone who fails to display the required embossed Mexican velvet painting of Alexander Haig on their living room wall will be shot. Cameras and surveillance equipment will be posted on all lampposts and streetlights. Anyone failing to attend required worship services on Sunday will be promptly arrested and dispatched to a re-education resort. Stay in your homes. Remain calm. The number one enemy of progress is questions. National security is more important than individual will. All sports broadcasts will proceed as normal. No more than two people may gather anywhere without permission. Use only the drugs prescribed by your boss or supervisor. Shut up! Be happy! Obey all orders without question. The comfort you've demanded is now mandatory. Be happy! At last -- everything is done for you.

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