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Submission + - Man throws away £4 million hard drive (

An anonymous reader writes: A man named James Howells recently discovered that he had thrown away a hard drive with over £4 million worth of Bitcoins. After his realization James Howells is frantically searching a land fill to recover said Bitcoins.

Submission + - TSA Tries Not to Handle Suspicious Pakage

Jeremiah Cornelius writes: Man with 'world's biggest penis' stopped at SFO security "They wanted to know if I had something in my pockets, and when I said no, they asked if I had some sort of growth," said Jonah Falcon. When he replied that it was just his penis, they "checked the area around it" ... They also wiped his hands to check for explosive powder. "It was probably harder on them than it was on me," Falcon said.

Submission + - Humor From the Bench (

Jeremiah Cornelius writes: In late July, Kenton Circuit Court judge Martin Sheehan received news of a settlement in a bitter legal malpractice suit he had been overseeing. Sheehan summed up his feelings about the development in an order (PDF) canceling the trial.

"Such news of an amicable settlement (has) made this Court happier than a tick on a fat dog because it is otherwise busier than a one legged cat in a sand box and, quite frankly would have rather jumped naked off a twelve foot step ladder into a five gallon bucket of porcupines than have presided over a two week trial of the herein dispute, a trial which, no doubt would have made the jury more confused than a hungry baby in a topless bar and made the parties and their attorneys madder than mosquitoes in a mannequin factory," Sheehan wrote.

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"The only way I can lose this election is if I'm caught in bed with a dead girl or a live boy." -- Louisiana governor Edwin Edwards