I think 5% is massively optimistic.

They might be capable, but do they? I don't ever remember ever picking a user agent for my android phone (whatever a "user agent" is...)

Android owners are all ghetto-dwellers or truck-driving-hillbillies. They don't mind the physical violence that goes along with shopping at sale time (in fact they quite enjoy it)

Apple owners are smarter and more sophisticated. They shop from home to avoid the Android owners from stepping on their new shoes.

Let's make sure it can be repeated before celebrating.

(looks around...)

Yes.

Maybe they used large screen devices called "tablets".

Android dominates the 'phone' market but I bet Apple still dominates 'tablets' (though maybe not for much longer).

....assuming they're dead. They might just be going tsk tsk.

I can already think in three different languages. One more wouldn't matter.

Yeah, that's the word. English isn't my everyday language, sorry.

Tape can do that, too.

Tape can be made to act like a great big disk, except some parts of it aren't available until the robot puts the correct tape in the drive.

It's on his face.

Huge-ass monitor can be behind a glass screen. Blast it with some antiseptic, job done.

How is this better than a huge-ass monitor?

And how do you sterilize them?

I think the website's logos are blue because the marketing department saw that everybody was choosing "blue" for their password...

No, RED! Aaaaaaaaargh!

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