You're right, instinct isn't the right word, but your conclusion I think is correct also. Instinct really is a bad word because what is really the case is more affinity than anything else. When our nervous systems interact with the environment we feel pleasure, pain or indifference as a response to the stimuli. Animals aren't hard-wired to just act a certain way, instead animals behave a certain way because their nervous systems reward them with endorphins for behaving certain ways if the response from the environment is conducive to the animal in some way (either as a reward for short term survival of the organism itself or as a reward for the long term survival of the animals genes. The latter providing the strongest rewards). It really is a bizarre way to propagate genes when you think about it this way, but it must be noted that only a subset of the animal kingdom uses this system.
As far as rising above these affinities, it's very hard for us to do, but I think being aware of it is the first step to rising above it. A certain amount of it can be done away with just by changing the environment. Take hunting for instance, ask any hunter that doesn't have to do it why they hunt and ultimately it will be because the feeling of the hunt is powerful. Having never hunted myself, I remain ignorant of this affinity and don't have a strong attraction to hunting. Same thing with the feeling of glory that soldiers get from slaughtering their enemies.
That being said, I think the attraction to certain affinities that have never been experienced can be a driving factor for an individuals behavior. I think it's a part of what we might consider curiosity. Obviously, some people are more curious about some things over other things and this isn't a function of environment. Who grows up in a serial killer household? And yet there are people who are curious about what it's like to engage in acts that the vast majority of us consider outrageous.
Anyway, enough rambling, back to work...