This is why I demand a copyright release up front from any photographer I pay to take pictures. I also demand all photos taken, not just the ones the photographer thinks I might like. It costs more, but it's worth it to me.
I did this for my wedding photos in 2002. I shopped around for photographers who would do this and the only one who agreed was actually cheaper than the others and took very good photos. The first few that I approached laughed in my face and smugly told me no-one in their industry would do it. I have since advised all my friends as they got engaged to shop around for a photographer who will let you have all the photos (and raw files) and release copyright to you.