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Journal Journal: No casinos in Gettysburg...for now

Not sure which side of the fence I'm on with this one.

I've lived by the 'burg all my life ( except for college), I could see the casino ruining the area.

But then too, the money could be nice...

Either way it fell, somebody wasn't going to be happy. It was an ugly battle before, it will get even uglier now I have a feeling.

Sean D

PC Games (Games)

Journal Journal: I can't help it I need a release...WOW... 5

My time maybe tight right now, but I can't do Maddie's feedings. So I have a few minutes now and then for WOW.

I'm still on a 10 day trial, a friend from work gave me a key. Damn HIM!!! now I'm a 7th level Undead Warrior Herbalist Alchemist.

All I have to do is balance Family, Work, House, and WOW. Just what I needed. Oh well. Once Maddie gets a little bigger I can put her in the baby carrier and strap her to me. Then we can decimate the Alliance as Father and Daughter and rule the world!!! Hahhahah!!!

But now tonight I'm going to dinner with guys from work and the CIO. This should be interesting. I probably won't get home till 10. Just in time to take Maddie off Amy's hands so she can get a shower. Luckily these dinner things are few and far between.

I probably won't be on tonight at all.

I'm on Blackwater Raiders. ID: Device (It's french...De-vi-cai, yeah whatever.)



Journal Journal: Let the games begin - Epilogue 5

More Pictures of Maddy.

I just posted 5 more up in flickr. She had just woken from a nap so the time was right for pictures. The hospital picture didn't do her justice.


Journal Journal: Baby of many 1

Baby picture of Madelyn Joi. You'll have to select November from the drop down.

Right now Maddy is resting comfortably in her bassinet. Mommy is giving me chores. I have to run to the store, of course.

I'll probably post one more journal entry with pictures, but after that I think this part of the journey is finished.

This is kind of weird, for the past 18 months or so I've been posting about a possible baby, and now we have Madelyn. I've gone from the highest of highs to the lowest of lows and back up again. It's been a stressful, tear-filled journey. At the end here I have 1 son, Zach, and 1 daughter Madelyn. I wish I could have both, but I couldn't have had one with out the other.

Thanks to everyone who supported Amy and me on this journey. I made some new friends I may never have had if it was for /. , so thanks to /. as well.

elmegil, thank you for your support and emails during the lows. They gave me the push to keep going. It's amazing to me how compassionate people are towards others that they never met. You're are a good man.

"This isn't the end, only the beginning of a new chapter", somebody probably said this before, but for me it's true. I'm not going anywhere, I'll probably post journals on occasion writing about the trials and tribulations of raising a daughter. But this is finished.

Thanks to everyone again. Sean and Amy, (though she probably doesn't realize it)

Journal Journal: BABY!!! Whoo-hoo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 11

Madelyn Joi Noel was born last night November 1st at 9:34 PM.

She weighed in at 7lbs 10oz and is 21 inches long.

She comes equipped with 10 fingers and 10 toes, and a hearty appetite.

Mom (Amy) is doing well, sore, but well.
I'm doing good too.

I will provide links to pictures later as well as more details. I just came home to shower, feed cats, and grab some things. Our mothers will start showing up at 11am so I need to get back to my wife for moral support.



Journal Journal: 37 weeks and counting 2

We've now switched gears. Instead of praying for her to stay in till week 36, we are now waiting eagerly for Maddy's arrival. She can show up at any time now. The official due date is Nov. 10th, I'm still thinking it will be Oct 27th. I don't know why I picked that day, I just did. We'll see how close she gets.

Amy is huge and the poor girl has stretch marks out the wazoo. She's all worried about them, I'm not. They are a necessary evil for some women. They say they're genetic, her mom had them. So what are you going to do? As long as she's healthy and Maddy's healthy, I'm happy.

The stress has now moved to the birth, Amy's already asking for pain meds for it. I think she'll be fine, this time will be definitely different than last. I still have those nagging "what-ifs" dancing around in my head, you know, cord issues, labor complications. I keep those to myself though, I don't need Amy to get all wound up about them. Once the baby is in my hands, yelling at me about how cold it is in the outside world, I'll get to relax, if only for a brief second. Then the other "what-ifs" can start up, day care, school, college...etc.

We are still debating about moving away, far away from our parents. I'm thinking Pittsburgh (240 miles away), Amy's thinking Shippensburg (40 miles away). I'm going to piss her mom and/or my mom off, I know it. I can just feel the tension already, they want to "share" with us all of their knowledge. (sorry for the "" that I use so much, it's a very limited tool to show sarcasm. I'm a very cynical person.) Knowledge transfer is fine, to a point. I may have to take us into seclusion.

Other than the week, nothing has changed.

I bought the mini-dv camera, Amy has her bag packed, the cats are aware that "something" is happening soon. I think we're about as ready as we can be for now.

When the day arrives I'll post vitals and pictures.

Sean D.


Journal Journal: Week 34 - She's an active little bugger 2

Yesterday we had the shower. Maddy better be a girl, (every picture says she is), we were given a ton of pink dresses. I cheered when it was any other color. We also got 4 or 5 quilts/afghans.

As far as baby progress...She's about 6 lbs (she was 5.5 last week at the doctors, so I'm adding the extra .5). So that puts us at about 8 - 8.5 lbs for a birth weight. That's about what I expected. Amy, obviously would prefer 6.5 to 7 lbs. But as long as Maddy's healthy.

Maddy is an active little thing, we can see her moving around, kind of neat and freaky at the same time.

Our stress level has dropped considerably. Amy got her last shot this morning, so after this week any thing goes. I'm starting to get excited about this, it's still difficult though. All the "what-if's" keep popping into my mind. I want to be prepared for everything, but that's not possible or practical.

Maddy's room is mostly finished. We have the psychedelic mobile hanging on the cribs, funky colors and swirls, plus it plays Mozart, Bach, and Beethoven. The crib and dresser are put together, the only thing we need to do yet it put the crib sheet on.

The cats are starting to sense the changes. Tarot, the english gentleman cat, will not like the loud noises or distruptions. However my guess is he'll be cordial to Maddy. Gigi, Surf-punk kitty, I'm not sure, she can handle the noise, but she gets pissy {angry pissy}. I've had her hiss at me just for looking at her. She doesn't swat with claws much anymore, but she still makes me nervous about how she'll deal with Maddy. Hopefully she'll just escape to the basement or under the bed. I can see her being interested in Maddy's toys. The cat steals Amy's pony-tail holders, she physically opens the drawer and pulls them out. I think there are about 20 scattered through out the house. We have to find them all before Maddy starts to crawl.

I'd love to find a Cesar Millon for cats, I don't think that person exists.

So to sum of Week 34, Everybody is good, Doctors are happy.

I'm picking Oct 27th as the birthday. The only reason for the date is that 27 is common number to "Weird Al" albums. No other reason.


User Journal

Journal Journal: Ending Week 27...and Aug 17th 2

Well yesterday came and went.

Amy and I took the day to prepare flowers for Zach's stone. We got him some "Little People" giraffes for a present. We connect certain animals to him. Giraffes and Cardinals. Cardinals because on the morning before we lost him Amy remembers hearing cardinals out side chirping. In an esoteric way we feel that was him saying goodbye then.

Giraffes? I'm not sure why. But we think of him when we see them.

It was touch and go yesterday. There were moments I thought I'd lose it again, but Amy and I seem to hold each other up pretty well.

Some weird coincidences, we had ordered a dresser for Madelyn. It came yesterday on Zach's birthday. Also we had birthing classes last night, at the hospital. Exactly 1 year later we were back to the scene of "crime". That was a weird feeling.

As for week 27, as of this past Monday Amy is on bed rest. Not the extreme type, just the stay off your feet, take it easy, and no going to work.

She seems to be progressing a little faster than the baby. So the docs gave her beta-something or other to help the baby's lungs develop sooner, just in case. But over all she seems well, baby is well. Maddy is kicking and moving, good heartbeat.

According to one of the tests the docs did, we have atleast 2 more weeks before problems could happen. I say atleast, I'm guessing in 2 weeks they'll do the test again. They were looking for some labor hormome, they didn't find it. So we have till about week 30.

Amy seems to think that Maddy will make her grand entrance at week 34. I'm saying the end of week 37. I hope I'm right.

Still haven't gotten the crib together. Maybe week 30.



Journal Journal: Week 26, still going strong 3

So far so good. Lots of sonnagrams, and everything is looking good.

Madelyn Joi. I think that's what we are going to go with for a name. My brother, a comic book guy, said, "MJ, where's Spidey?". I'll probably call her that on occasion, MJ, not Spidey.

It's kind of weird now, we're further along than where we were last time. So it's all new from here on out. I'm still a little skittish about putting the crib together. I think that may end up being a little emotional.

We did order the dresser/hutch thingy, so that's something else to put together. I may put that up before the crib. Something about that crib, it being Zach's, I just have to get past that.

Zach's birthday is coming up next week, August 17th. The closer I get to it the more I think about him, the day, Amy...the whole unfairness of the situation. We wanted him, he wanted to live, everybody was denied their wish. But now we have Madelyn to look towards, care for, love, teach... Damn, I hope we don't screw her up.

Amy is doing really well, she looks good, sounds good. Her birthday was yesterday, 29, she's dreading next year. She's done some shopping, we now have a plethora of dresses, and shoes. They only thing getting to her is the heat, but we do have AC.

Something weird, we started birthing classes last week. Yeah, we've already been through one birth, but we never got the classes. According to the class instructors they want you to be 30 weeks before attending the classes. They should start them sooner, at like week 14 or something.

My idea:

Group 1: Week 10 - week 20
Talk Nutrition, and upcoming changes, possible danger signs, problem pregnancies.

Group 2: Week 21 - Week 32
Talk Baby development progress, upcoming changes, intro to breathing, vaginal/Cesarian birth.

Group 3: Week 33 - week 37
Talk Labor, baby positions, first weeks of baby care, Relaxation techniques during labor.

Spread the classes out. Right now they talk about nutrition to women who are 35 weeks along...duh, should have talked to them at the beginning. With Zach, if we had been aware of some of the danger signs that they discussed we might have been able to save him, but our classes didn't start to about 2 weeks after he was born. To late, sorry please play again.

Yep, I'm still angry, hurt, sad (maybe depressed, Amy thinks so, and she should know). But I, I will survive...yada yada yada.

Sean D.


Journal Journal: Week 20, it's a girl! 7

We enter week 20 now knowing that we shall have a daughter.

Madelyn {something} ... Haven't decided on a middle name yet.

We had another set of ultrasounds done today. I'm thinking by the end we will have a flip book; "Here's one when you were a blob. (ala Stern), Here's one when your fingers were just nubs, here's one where you looked like Charlie Brown...etc

Amy is doing well, she not nearly as big this time. For some reason it's reassuring. We, as a couple, are starting to come out of our protective shell. It's really tough not getting excited, but at the same time we need to get excited to a point. We don't want to get burned again, but we also want to bond with Maddy as much as possible. It's a weird balancing act. I think if we can get passed we 25 then we'll breathe a brief sigh of relief. Then we need to get past Zach's birthday. Dang, his first birthday is coming up fast. I think I scheduled the day off. That will probably be a tough day for both Amy and me.

It helps knowing though that he's looking out for us, and his baby sister. In a way I wish I could have both of them, Zach and Madelyn. But I know I couldn't. That's one of the cruel twists of life.

We went shopping after the sonagram, we bought 2 newborn girl outfits, and a pink bunny. I picked out the bunny. Amy and I have this agreement, I think we do atleast, we can start buying stuff now. However if we lose Madelyn, everything we bought will get donated to some charity.

In the mean time, I'm planning on enjoying the fact that we have a daughter, who seems to be healthy. And from now on I will always have one.

One saying keeps ringing in my ears:
"When you have a boy, all you worry about is one little boy.
  When you have a girl, you worry about all the little boys" - not sure who said it, but I like it.

Sean D.


Journal Journal: A new single..You're Pitiful

If you go to Weird Al's Site you can pick up a new song. It's "You're Pitiful", parodying "You're Beautiful".

It apparently was suppose to be the single to be released off his new album. But something went wacky with the parodied artist's record company. So he just released the song into the wild.

It's a 192kbps MP3, so it is a decent quality.

I like it better than the original. The lyrics fit too many people I know.



Journal Journal: Baby status good... 2

So far so good. Amy is doing well, she's not getting as big as fast as last time. Plus her pains and sicknesses are a little different. So now we're both thinking it's a girl. No proof of that, just a gut feeling. I'll be happy with a baby. Boy or girl. She's currently at 15 weeks. 9 more till we hit the point we were at with Zach. That's kind of scary. We are being as careful as possible. Starting in June we see the Neo-Natalist doctors in York, (bigger better hospital 30 minutes away).
      I'd post the pictures of the first sonagram, but I think Amy would freak. We got to see that the kid had all the major pieces, head, arms, legs. So so far so good.

    And after much wailing and gnashing of teeth, she was able to pry my hands away from the Firebird. It was time, I guess. It had low miles but was becoming a maintenence problem. Plus whenever we drove it any where Amy would get sick.

    So now I have an '06 Scion tC. It's the V2.0 one, Blue Mica Blitz paint, special grills, iPod capable, MP3 ready. It's a zippy little 4 cylinder. Reminds me of my Dad's old Nissan Sentra. It has a better use of the interior space than the Firebird. Plus it has the Child seat LATCH stuff. Side impact airbags, blah blah blah. It's a neat little car. Definitely not a f-body GM.

Pictures of the "Old" and "New" are available. I finally signed up for a Flickr account. I'll post some more when I'm finished here.

Well that's all for now. I don't like to ramble.

Sean D.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Whoo-hoo I made it!!! 1

No internet surfing while I'm at work during Lent.

I took off early today, plus we have off tomorrow.

It was tough the first week or 2, now I barely notice it.

Other than that, Amy's doing fine. We go to the High risk Doctors in June. We'll get Genetic Couseling, not sure about that. Also we get the sonagram.

Not much else.

Happy Easter/Passover!



Journal Journal: Well it's official... 2

You already know that Amy is with child. We're at week 8.
She's showing already, so there's really no hiding it.

The official news, is that I did get the promotion...YAY!

It's kind of whacked though. Since I'm a newbie at this type of job I have Manager Mentor, who will be there for questions and the critical decisions. In the mean time I get to learn about budgets and projects and managing in general.

I did get my old Boss's office though. So now I have a door! and windows! Real windows! It's a little hard for me though to leave the area I was in though. I sat in the same area for 8 freakin' years. I know my group now, very well, almost too well. Now I'm around a corner and across the hall. Not far, but far enough that I don't get to hear the everyday banter that goes on in the group. Maybe there's a purpose there. I'll have to see.

My old boss retired today. It's sad to see him go, he's a great guy. Very easy to work for. But Golf is his life now. Not SAP.

My title has gone from Sr Programmer Analyst to SAP Coordinator. So I'm not really management. I'll have to earn my way up. That's fine though, I need to learn it.

And no, I don't believe there's any extra money. Yet. Once I prove myself in this position, then maybe.

This is going to be an interesting year.


User Journal

Journal Journal: Man, this Lent thing is tough 4

I still have God knows how many days to go, I'm starting to go nuts at work. Especially Friday afternoons. Fridays are dead in my office, so I've had to get creative. I have actually caught up on most of my projects, at least the projects that are worth doing.

Things are going well, for all. I'm in NJ tonight and tomorrow. Bored in a Hampton Inn. Watchin' Olbermann...

Amy's at home, a college friend of her's came down to visit her. She, the friend, brought her 2 year old daughter along to terrorize our cats. They needed a good chasing. Lazy cats.

About the previously mentioned news, it's true, Amy's currently with child(ren). We're still so very early in this process, just started week 6, so hardly any one but Amy and me know. Now you do, so keep it hush-hush, don't tell our folks. We're going to try to wait the 3 months before we tell our parents. My Mom will go nuts, happily, heck last time she went hyper-sonic scaring dogs 3 counties away. Her Mom, lots of questions, "Are you sure you want to do this?" uh duh. She has the ability to make Amy feel guilty about anything, it's amazing.

I say child(ren), because we're not sure. Amy's been extremely tired and hungry, and she's only beginning her 6th week. She also worried about it possibly being diabetes (Sp?) or her thyroid.
I'd rather it be twins that diabetes, but I'll be thrilled with 1 health baby. That's all I want. Anything more is gravy.

We've taken some pictures of changes, eventually I'd like to get a simple web page up showing the progress. That won't happen though till after the 3 month "quiet period".

I just can't keep this to myself any more, I'm happy and scared all at the same time. Scared because of what I know can happen, and Happy, well, that's kind of a given.

I'll sign off for now. My mind is wondering and I'm on a crappy laptop, so I can't type worth a damn.


Sean D.

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