Page 23 of Nearest Book . . .

Grab the nearest book. Turn to page 23. Find the fifth sentence. Post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions.

I looked for a book, any book, that was closer than this one. I gazed longingly at my Foundations of Education textbook, and slightly further away, my copy of Hackers: Heroes of the Computer Revolution. Alas, I was left with this quote:

"If a deposit is required, it will be returned as a credit on your bill 11 to 13 months after service is established, assuming your bills have been paid on time."

From the BELLSOUTH Real White Pages.

Buoyancy Disorders

Apparently, and this is from the New York Times Magazine, there is such a thing as buoyancy disorders among fish. The poor little guppies are doomed to swim upside down, or, worse, always tail end up or head end up. Feeding the fish a crushed pea might cure this disorder, or it might need surgery.

Dream Sequence

There's massive flooding in the town where my grandmother lives. This is a small town, but apparently they've built an airport here, because they're airlifting 250 guys to help. I don't know how 250 guys can help a town that's already flooded while it's still being flooded, but oh well. I have my car and my family is there. I tell them I'm going back to my hometown for something but I'm planning to be back in a bit. Should I pick anything up for them?

They need food. What kind? Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Apparently, you have to drive halfway across the state to acquire this scarce but desperately needed resource. I agree, but for 250 people that's going to be a lot of peanut butter and jelly, never mind the bread. Selfishly attempting to limit the damage to my wallet, I ask how much peanut butter each guy wants on his sandwich.

I really need to stop sleeping.

RATED_R LIVES!

You know who you are, and why I wrote this. Who is that autographed to? I don't recognize the name.

If you actually read this journal, make a comment!

#1) Showing up at work without pants. Cliche, but I dreamed it. Something along the lines of digging through the stock room looking for my pants hoping that BOSS_LADY doesn't find out I'm in violation of dress code.

#2) Fighting in the jungles and parking lots of Iraq. It was like summer camp, we even had our own rooms with made-up beds, except one guy in a boat shot a rocket at us. A few people died & in my dream my gun was so screwed up if I let go of it it would fall apart.

#3) Asteroid Strike. I was living in some other city, and suddenly find myself alone in my room (in this other city) covering myself with blankets because -- and apparently everyone else had known it was coming for months -- an asteroid was going to hit the city. It hit, I felt the shockwave, slowly tilting me side to side and then BUMP, but didn't catch on fire or anything. I washed myself off, grabbing a baseball bat from the car in case anyone came after me, and went to go see the destruction and help the survivors. I was trying to help the other people who were trying to help the survivors, but they weren't actually being very helpful.

MacOS X Reinstall:

Copied all my files to the other computer and back again. Noticed the thread on reinstalls, so let's see:

1. fink
2. gaim
3. povray
4. bzflag
5. the GIMP
6. GNOME
7. Enlightenment and fvwm
8. Mozilla
9. xplanet
10. dillo

Also, this post marks the passing of the first entire year of me keeping a /. journal.

Moo.

Progress: 331 locs/2 classes

I did mention that the lines of code count includes things like comments and GPL notices, right? I just use wc.

ME_MYSELF: Man, this lady was fat. She was getting winded just walking across the store. I could get down and hop on one knee faster than she walks.

DEATH_DEALER: Is it that lady over there?

ME_MYSELF: No, I think the one I was talking about is gone now. But she was like three or four times larger than that one. I mean we're talking really, really fat here.

DEATH_DEALER: Yeah, that's pretty messed up.

ME_MYSELF: I think, like if society just went to hell right now, and nobody could get any food, she could just sit in a chair for a year and metabolize body fat and be fine.

DEATH_DEALER: It would be like a movie.

ME_MYSELF: Huh?

DEATH_DEALER: Like you would just see her deflate in the chair.

ME_MYSELF: Like a fast motion thing?

DEATH_DEALER: Yeah, and like you would see it flashing back and forth, like night and day. Like in some stone.

ME_MYSELF: Stone? You mean like a stone chair? Or in some ruins or something?

DEATH_DEALER: Yeah, exactly. For some reason I just had a really clear image of her outside in this chair.

ME_MYSELF: ::walking in the door:: Hey, what's up?

KHALIS: Oh. You must have not gotten my message.

KHALIS: We think RASZAGAL is in labor.

RASZAGAL: Hey, ME_MYSELF.

JAY_JAY_THE_JET_PLANE: DADDY. SOMEBODY SHOT YOU DADDY. DADDY, SOMEBODY SHOT YOU.

ME_MYSELF: So, no game tonight?

KHALIS: Hold on, JAY_JAY_THE_JET_PLANE, I'm coming.

KHALIS: Did you want me to check on your car?

JAY_JAY_THE_JET_PLANE: SOMEBODY SHOT YOU, DADDY.

ME_MYSELF: Oh, no, I left it in the shop. Actually, I was going to get DEATH_DEALER or RATED_R to drive me back there so I could pick it up. I should probably call DEATH_DEALER.

KHALIS: I can take you.

ME_MYSELF: ::awkward concerned look::

JAY_JAY_THE_JET_PLANE: DADDY. SOMEBODY SHOT YOU.

RASZAGAL: You're really not imposing that much. It's gonna be a few hours.

KHALIS: We can hit the comic book store on the way.

ME_MYSELF: Well - yeah, I guess if you were going there anyway.

KHALIS: Here let me see. I don't see anything, JAY_JAY_THE_JET_PLANE.

JAY_JAY_THE_JET_PLANE: SOMEBODY SHOT YOU. I SAW IT.

KHALIS: Ok, yeah, he's there. But I can only go three quarters speed, cause I took damage in the last battle.

JAY_JAY_THE_JET_PLACE: THERE HE IS, DADDY, I SEE HIM.

KHALIS: I can't go to warp inside a solar system or I'll burn up. Or maybe you can go to warp. Hold on, I don't know what I'm doing with this because I didn't read the manual.

KHALIS'S COMPUTER: Warning: Cardassian warship decloaking. ::phaser sound effect::

ME_MYSELF: What game is this?

JAY_JAY_THE_JET_PLANE: THERE HE IS DADDY. HE SHOT YOU AGAIN.

KHALIS: Uhhhh, Starfleet Armada.

KHALIS'S COMPUTER: ::phaser & photon torpedo sound effects::

KHALIS: Hey, look JAY_JAY_THE_JET_PLANE, it's a photon torpedo. ::shoots more photon torpedos::

JAY_JAY_THE_JET_PLANE: YEAH, IT'S A PHOTON TORPEDO.

KHALIS'S COMPUTER: Target destroyed.

KHALIS: Ok, you want to hit the comic book shop, and then we'll take ME_MYSELF to pick up his car. But you can only take TWO starships, ok?

JAY_JAY_THE_JET_PLANE: Ok!

RASZAGAL: Hey, if you're going out, take hyper-boy with you.

RASZAGAL: And take the cell-phone too.

Microsoft is shafted . . . new BSG series . . . I no longer suck at bzflag . . . and I finished a major component of the Reciprocity Project.

I guess today is my lucky day.

We're at 35678 locs and rising, official progress report later.

I don't pirate stuff myself, including Halo, but really: Screw You, Bungie

MOO_COW: No

ME_MYSELF: I heard they were good. I got a CD today.

ME_MYSELF: They're like the Barenaked Ladies, but chicks!

ME_MYSELF: I didn't realize how that was going to come out.

ME_MYSELF: Ok

URAJ: You know how, for my birthday, my boyfriend gave me the mug with his drawing in it?

ME_MYSELF: Yeah. That was cool.

URAJ: Well I was thinking to pick out a few comic books and cut out the pictures -

URAJ: I know that's sacrilege -

URAJ: But because I don't have the artistic bent . . . I was going to cut out some of the characters - you know - and put them together - and make him a mug for valentines day.

ME_MYSELF: Cool.

URAJ: I was wondering if you thought he would like that?

ME_MYSELF: Well . . . you know your boyfriend better than I do.

URAJ: Yeah, but I mean if you were a guy, you would like it?

ME_MYSELF: Yeah, that would -

ME_MYSELF: Wait.

URAJ: Oh.

ME_MYSELF: I think I am one of those already.

URAJ: I mean -

ME_MYSELF: That's a classic.

URAJ: Would a guy think that that's neat?

ME_MYSELF: Well I think it's cool. But, you know, I'm not really a comic book person myself.

URAJ: But if you were you'd think it's a good idea?

ME_MYSELF: Well it's very creative. I like that. Yeah.