I'm not in marketing or an editor, you kids can re-write this with a Slashdot spin. It's bogus and only mildly amusing until you realize they're all actors and the joke is on you.
As just heard on Off the Hook 10 January 2007, a Verizon feature that allows the staff, and apparently anybody else who has Verizon mobile service, to request warrants and other fun stuff. #3667
Biology grows on you.