We got two rough mixes of songs up on the net. ROUGH i say! Some vocals will be redone, some mixing will be done, and some pigsticking will be done. In other news, Will and I wrote and recorded parts of a new song today. Rock and cock. Downloadage:

http://fredrock.org/newmusic.html

By the way....we still haven't come up with a band name yet. Its in the mail.

Update: June 21-The song "Chips and Salsa" has been removed due to Clint and I being the biggest wankers in the world.

Yea it's offical, The Jeff Mullins Band has reunited for another album (although we won't be called "The Jeff Mullins Band" anymore due to Jeff's current assumed hatred of me I'm worried I'd wake up with him crouching above my bed drooling blood with a knife in his teeth ready to slit my throat)...

N-E WAYZ...we have written about four songs and recorded parts of three. They are good. They are quite a bit different than the old cd though. Yesterday we put the finishing touches on a song about Will (that he happens to want to send Jeff after me for) that I think is pretty good! Today Will and I stood around the house in our underwear and recorded drums and guitar to a song we all wrote yesterday, and later Will's gonna add bass - hopefully in a thong. We will get Clint to put down his vocals sometime next week I suppose. When we get something totally mixed, I'll post it up for you eager kids. I'm off to the land of bacon, sex, and my mom. Latex.

I have a new house.
I have new neighbors.
I like pirate flags.
The neighbors don't.
I like to play drums.
The neighbors don't.
I like to have my new driveway installed at 7am.
The neighbors....don't.
I am ok with all of these things.

-An imaginary father figure used to scare little kids into not masturbating.

-A clever illusion designed by the mentally ill to keep human civilization from reaching the stars. An illusion created to prevent humans from accepting that they die and decay away like every other living being, and to effectively control the gullible, stupid majority of the human species.

-Takes full credit for your accomplishments, but is never to blame for your failures.

-Billions and billions of people all sharing an imaginary friend.

-A phrase that people repeat over and over during sexual intercourse.

-An old man in the sky who cares *way* too much where you put your penis.

-Something people look for but find religion instead.

-The universe's first pimp, he created Earth as his crib to hang with his homies and hos.

-Invisible Grandpa.

-A fictional character created by early human beings of many cultures and locations around the world to explain their existence and natural phenomina they do not understand

-An uberleet haxor (You may be root, but I am God)

-Idea used to control men, women and children into believing they should follow rules and regulations created by man so they will not go to an imaginary location (hell, heaven, etc.)

-That guy who looks at you when you're touching yourself. He also has the power to shrink male gentails at his will.

-A really tall dude that will pimp slap you with a lightning bolt.

-My cat.

I fucking love The Aquabats. They released a few new demo songs. The recording is rough, but the rock is present.
Download this song:
Aquabats-May 9 2003-Yo Check Out This Ride (Demo).mp3

Sing Along:
Yo, I'm A freak.
I'm so unique.
I'm rockin' dubs
On My Honda Civic
My woofers woof
My tweeters tweet
I've got A different ride
For every day of the week

So where my ladies at?
Well comeon ladies lets go for a ride
Cause we got stoopid cash
we're gonna throw it out the windows tonite

So check it out
What exactly are we checking out?
We're just cruzin around
Checking out each other
Checking each other out!

This car (This car!), I drive in
This vehical, that I ride in
So hard (So hard!), So Stylin'
Makin all the ladies we pass start cryin

Yo! Yo do you want to take a ride?
Lets go baby!
No she dosen't want to take a ride!
You gotta check out this ride!

Yo check out this ri-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ide!
Yo check out this ri-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ide!

I'm wicked sweet!
I'm rollin deep
More rap cd's than I got seats
My Kias smooth
I've been approved
This credit card, will put you in the mood

So where my ladies at?
Well comeon ladies lets go for a ride
Cause we got stoopid cash
we're gonna throw it out the window tonite

So check it out
What exactly are we checking out?
We're just cruzin around
Checking out each other
Checking each other out!

This car (This car!), I drive in
This vehical, that I ride in
So hard (So hard!), So Stylin'
Makin all the ladies we pass start cryin

Yo! Yo do you want to take a ride?
Lets go baby!
No she dosen't want to take a ride!
You gotta check out this ride!

Yo check out this ri-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ide!
Yo check out this ri-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ide!

I bought a 91 Celica
I lowered the back
I drop some duece
With some juice on the front of my gat
And I ain't braggin'
My back is draggin'
I got this fresh whale tale on my lowered covered wagon
You peeps is getting panic attacks
When i roll thru Iraq
With a sack of fat stacks
An airbrush of Shaq
On my Cizzadillac
And you know it's hard
I got A haunted house black light under my car
And I'm freaking people out dawg!

This car (This car!), I drive in
This vehical, that I ride in
So hard (So hard!), So Stylin'
Makin all the ladies we pass start cryin

Yo! Yo do you want to take a ride?
Lets go baby!
No she dosen't want to take a ride!
You gotta check out this ride!

Yo check out this ri-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ide!
Yo check out this ri-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ide!

Pissgasms are old and busted. Shitgasms are the new hotness. Here's detailed instructions so you can have your own shitgasm in your own home!

Step 1: Dont poop for days. Weeks if possible.

Step 2: Take a fat steaming shit.

Step 3: While dropping the Huxtables off, use your stomach muscles to push the painfully large load of ass tribblets towards your prostate.

Step 4: Push fast enough to cause friction upon the prostate, but slow enough to make it last. (This takes practice)

Step 5: Cum. Everywhere. Gallons. Piss if you can. Cum more. Cum till you bleed. Cum till your neighbor bleeds. Cum till I bleed.

~fin

The Aquabats never tour. Motherfuckers. The one time they came anywhere near us, Chip pussed out and wouldnt let me go see them. I was thinking about going and seeing them May 10th in California, but it would be like $400 for a plane ticket, the show, food, and all the Aquabats crap I'd buy at the show. I can't afford that right now because I'm buying a gay little house. So due to my shit-shocking situation I have devised a reason to get married. If I have a wedding it is tradition for someone else to play for all the shit. In respect of that rule, I want that someone to pay for the Aquabats to fly from California to Virginia and play at my wedding. And I don't mean play at the reception. I mean play the fucking wedding. Like Leah (or whoever is willing to marry me for this noble cause) can walk down the isle to "Red Sweater". And they can play "Monsters Wedding" during the vows. Sweet tits, thats for sure.

..But Eric...what *about* the reception!? Not to worry my fruit flavord turd bar of steel, I've got that planned out too! Not only will the mighty Aquabats play the wedding, but they will be engaged in a BATTLE WITH GWAR at the reception!! Blood and gore! Death and desrtuction! The two GREATEST bands ever, kicking ass and taking names in one awesome spectical! And the best part is your dumbass isn't invited, cause I most likely don't like you. Drop off the earth or I'll stab you in the eye with my rock solid nut napkin, fucknuts.

It's one thing to rock cock, but it's totally fucked up to piss rocks out your cock.

...but it's awful to look at the clock and realize it's 3pm and you still haven't gotten out of bed all day eventhough you've had to use the bathroom so bad for the past six hours there is a little spot of piss on your sheets.

The problem I have with religion isn't the Jebus. It's not the silly myths. It's not the fact that zillions of people have been slaughtered over it. It's not the hatred sponsored by churches over thousands of years. It's not the fact that people use "the name of god" to justify evil actions to each other. It's not the fact that people spend their entire lives acting like they aren't horrible just to impress their "all knowing" god. (If he's all knowing what good does it do to lie, fuckers?) It's not the fact that people are so arrogant they can possibly think their religion is the right one, just because it was the one their parents fucked down their throats. The real problem I have with religion is in order to have faith in a specific god you have to have faith in other people. People who documented your particular saviors actions. People who translated those works into a current language. People who copied it into new editions and versions. This is literally millions of hands the "authentic" scripture has passed through. Hands of people from different times. People with different agendas and inspirations. People with all sorts of different reasons to lie in documentation to make their lives better. To make their own name immortal. To make small changes they think don't matter. To make big changes they think do matter. People that don't mean to make changes but are stupid and make poor interpretations of others wittings. People that are smart and do the same thing. The fact that there have obviously been corrupt people in the church (as there are in everything), believing that an evil hand has never had it's digits bend the word of god for it's own good is an asinine assumption. If you don't believe people are lying cunts you've never worked in retail. Or gone to church.

Ever play a game of "Telephone" when you were a little kid? Imagine doing that, but in 40 different languages, and over 2000 years. And with a sentence 3,000 pages long. Now send it through power hungry insane tyrants who lived in something called "The Dark Ages". Seriously people, how the crap could *anyone* believe the outcome? Most of the people involved were less educated than the little kids playing Telephone, and remember how badly just one sentence got fucked up in 3 minutes?

I'm not creating a misappropriation about faith in a higher being. I'm not arguing there is or is not a "god" of some sort. Not this time anyways. What I can't believe is people actually get up and go to church, pumping hard earned cash into a strangers hands for him to read to you out of a book that is just obviously loosely (and I use that term loosely) based on fact. I would rather spend my money on the Jurassic Park trilogy. It's on DvD you know. And then I could buy a 5.1 audio system, and it would sound like dinosaurs were stomping through my house. And it's probably more likely that a real dinosaur would stomp through my living room than it is for Jesus to untack himself from his cross and come make me some Berrytastic-Blue Cool-Aid, despite what your read in your funny little book.

I have a weird feeling Justin has a thing for Claire Danes, eventhough I'm basing this on absolutely nothing.

...is kinda like making fun of deaf people. Even of they know what you are saying, they can't do anything but make dumb noises.

Masturbation is one of those things that can take a long time because you are really good at it, or equally as long if you are really bad at it.

~This entry is dedicated to the memory of Chip, whose soul was devoured in a awful quantum fart tunneling experiment~

Hi Leah! The Bouncing Souls show tonite was lots of fun! Geoffery thinks the singer is hot too! A girl that was taking pictures for the band took a picture of me from afar, and then winked at me. I think she thought I was cute! I think she's right! What time do you work tomorrow? Call me at work and let me know, ok? Love you..bye!


eric.


PS...Peeing in the back of a toilet is lots of fun!

A friend of mine just mentioned we are going to war in 48 hours.

Why are we fighting brown people in Iraq when North Korea is actively developing "weapons of mass destruction" (what bomb is not a weapon of mass destruction anyways..?). I'll tell you why we want to kill brown people. It's not the brown people, it's the lack of interest we have in N. Korea. The only known resource North Korea has is a surplus of naked Asian girls- I know cause I'm a geographer. Now as hot as that may be, a naked Asian girl is worth less pound to pound than oil is to Bush's stock portfolio. What we need to do is get Bush to invest in Asian shiteater porn and the brown-people seeking missiles will suddenly be switched to yellow seeking mode. Then instead of gas prices going up during the conflict the demand for naked Asian girls will triple, and I'll be rich.